just don't know what to do

sunrosejenn wrote: it's been awhile since i've talked about this.

I saw a dr and was diagnosed with PPD (been denying it for over a year now) ... this dr referred me to a local dr. call the new dr to make an appt and they give me this round around that they usually only deal with referrals from family physicians associated with Memorial Hospital. at this point I was upset. she then stated she would get the referral form filled out by my first dr but this doesn't mean they can take me on as a patient.

in the meantime I re-applied for medicaid as something happened and it got cancelled. I also had to re-apply for Eliana. well guess what? Eliana qualifies but I do not. I make too much money GGGRRR being a single mother and no CS and doing everything on my own I DON'T QUALIFY.

since my job is through a temp agency I will get insurance once I get hired in. the only problem is this position is temp to hire 3-5 YEARS. so I have to wait 3 years for insurance.

my first therapist dr wants me to see this local therapist and get on some meds. but with no insurance there just is no possible way.

as time goes on i'm getting more and more depressed. i don't want to get out of bed. i don't want to go to work. i don't want to eat. i can't sleep right and the list goes on.

how am I supposed to be the best mommie for Eliana when I can't even help myself??? just at a loss as what to do

PhiMuMommy replied: have you thought about getting insurance through an outside agency? you'll pay a little more but it would be a lot better than none at all.

My3LilMonkeys replied: Maybe try to find a therapist who does pro bono work or will offer reduced rates? It might be a start.

MommyToAshley replied: I wish I knew what to say.

I have to agree with you that insurance and the medical system just plain SUCKS. Can you talk to your doctor or therapist? They may know of a resource for people with PPD that you aren't aware of. When my sister's child was having seizures, they didn't qualify for assistance but had no insurance. However, the doc found a program to help pay for everything. It never hurts to ask.

I hope soemthing works out.

sunrosejenn replied: I spent an hour online yesterday getting insurance quotes. I was given quotes of $173-255 a month for myself. And they all had $30 office visits and 20% co pays on everything after the deductible.

I will contact my doctor today. on friday's we only work 630am-1030am so i'll have time to make some calls.

thanks for all your help!

ammommy replied: I know that it seems like a lot of $$, but those are pretty good rates. It's less than we pay with our crappy insurance I hope that something works out. Can you reapply? Maybe a mistake was made in the calculations.
and good luck.

jcc64 replied: First of all, I'm very sorry that you're having such a hard time. It's hard enough to be struggling with depression, which by its very nature. robs you of your energy and ability to effectively problem solve. But then to have to deal with bureaucracy and a very unsympathetic and withholding medical system. I suspect the dr to whom you were referred may have given you the run around b/c of your unresolved insurance issues. Whenever I call a dr, before I get 2 words out of my mouth, the receptionist is asking what my insurance plan is.
But there are resources for people like yourself, although they vary from state to state. You may have to do a little searching before you find it. Because this is a pregnancy related illness, you may start with Planned Parenthood. They undoubtedly have a list of resources or providers who will accept people in your situation. They may even be able to handle the counseling themselves. If they can't, I suspect they will point you in the right direction. The other place to check is your county mental health services, which you will probably find through the dept of social services. Not sure if you're affiliated with a particular church, but they can often be a very valuable resource for counseling and support.
I know how bad PPD and depression can make you feel. I've been through it. But there are so many ways out, once you gain access to care- it's totally unnecessary to suffer indefinitely. You gotta keep fighting- for yourself and for your dd. Nothing else matters more. Good luck and feel free to pm me if you're having a bad time. Sometimes it helps to talk to someone who's been there.

jacobsmama replied: hello, I just wanted to say that I"m sorry you are going through this and I know exactly what you are feeling. My son is 22 months old and just about 5 months ago I got on some meds for PPD. I like you didn't want to admit it. I'm a nurse at OBGYN and the dr I work for also delivered my son and we are very close. She called me and said I really needed to do something b/c I just wasn't the same anymore. She was right and I knew this but I was like you denyiing it. But I was getting to the point of not wanting to do anything, not caring, not wanting to work or get up. And like you I have NO insurance. So I was refered to this counselor and she only charges me 40 dollars which is great but she also put me on meds or suggested it and I explained I had no insurance and could not afford medicine and she suggested that I get samples from where I work....What a great idea and it is helping me tremendously. If you need meds then you need them. Ask them to put you on something you can have samples of and don't let them tell you theydont' have them b/c believe me they have pleanty. Here are some that aren't generic yet that we get samples of and the people all over the US should as well. Hope this helps and please IM I know how hard this is.

Lexapro
Wellburtin XL
Zoloft
Cymbalta
Effexor XR

Hope this helps some of these may have generic but they are still sampled!

jem0622 replied: I'm sorry that you are still struggling with these emotions, and I'm sorry that the extra burden has been put on your shoulders to find something to cover yourself. Some doctors will give out free sample packs of meds to those who cannot afford it. Can you be seen by your local health department to get the script? There are many support groups in the community that cost you nothing (through churches and other means). This might be the answer in getting support you need at a better cost (none!).

HUGS

sunrosejenn replied: ammommy - i've seen the medicaid income guidelines...i have to make less then 17 thousand a year before taxes...well after taxes I make 15 thousand something a year and before taxes 20 thousand something. if I spend $173-255 a month on insurance for me I won't be able to afford food, diapers, and wipes or anything else Eliana needs. Once bills are paid I have $250 left for utilities, food and Eliana's diapers, wipes etc.

jcc64- the 1st dr has worked with the 2nd dr before so I'm not sure why they say they don't take referrals from outside dr's. the 2nd dr's receptionist didn't even ask what kind of insurance. just stated they only deal with referrals from dr's assocaited with the hospital not the dr that referred me. I find this to be BS as I know these 2 dr's have worked together before. this town is small so I'm not sure we even have a planned parenthood. the 2nd dr's office is the county mental health services as far as I understand. the reason I was seen by the first dr was that Child Protective Services referred me to them. the thing is I have to see a dr and etc otherwise who knows what they will do. seems someone called CPS and stated I'm neglecting my daughter. I find that quite funny since she doesn't go without but I do. I do not attend a church and haven't since 1998. I went to my friend's church for help and the lady wasn't of much help. she didn't know what to do or suggest to help me.

jacobsmama - with this town being so small we don't have alot of resources here. and to really find the resources I need I will have to drive 1hr 15mins. I can't afford to take a whole day off work and then the gas $ plus paying for the dr & meds. it's a catch 22 cycle.

jem0622 - i'm not sure the health department can help. i'm waiting for a call back as Friday's they are only open a half day.


on another note even if I paid for insurance on my own everything would be considered pre-existing condition since i've already seen a dr and had phsycological(spelling) testing done. And wouldn't be covered for a year. another catch 22.

thanks for all your help and suggestions.

PrairieMom replied:
I know that it sucks, but you really should have insurance, even if it won't cover your preexisting condition. One little accident, and you could be financially wiped out. Even just something like breaking your leg. you have ER costs, xrays, Dr.s , and equipment, it could thousands of dollars.
Not to be a huge downer here, I know the whole insurance thing completely sucks. I have to carry 2 insurances because I am waiting out a 3 YEAR rider for my totally under control mild asthma.

sunrosejenn replied: yea I know I should have insurance but paying $173-255 a month would wipe out all my money meaning none left for food or utilities or diapers or wipes.

i'm not sure I can justify insurance over heat, electric, food and essentials for Eliana

MyBrownEyedBoy replied: I have no more advice other than what has already been said here. Check with your doc for samples, that is important. Also some doctors have programs where they can get the drug companies to supply your meds for free or reduced prices. Other than that, I just thought you could use a huge HUG!!

~Roo'sMama~ replied: I'm so sorry you're going through this!! Insurance is so expensive, even if you're getting it through work let alone having to pay it all by yourself.

Sometimes just being able to talk to someone about it all is a big help. Do you have a church you go to, or even if you don't go I'm sure the pastor or his wife would be willing to listen, or recommend someone they know who has gone through the same thing.