its up to me , right?

abunky wrote: hello all i'm new , but any how i have 2 boys ages 2 and 4 , well my 2 year old is still nursing , i dont see anything wrong with this by no means , he sorta weaning but he seems content at where hes at so i'm not pushing the issue to wean him...now i would think my family of all people would be understanding , but they are giving me grief about BF for so long , but i know the choice is mine , and my baby is happy , so i dot see the big deal from them or anyone , but yet i still get the freaked out looks , , i know its a weird question , but should i try to try to wean him , or just ignore the harrasement and keep doing what makes me and my baby happy..i know dumb question , but i live with my mom and she a real mouthy person when she doesnt like something..i guess i'm just looking for some women out there to understand what i'm feeling and going threw a good support team

boyohboyohboy replied: I can remember thinking when i was deciding to nurse that people who nursed that long, well it seemed strange, but then when i did nurse, and the experience was so great, i kept it up as long as i could, now that he is two and i see that he still seems like a baby, i can see where a two yr old could still nurse..and its not weird at all.
i would think if your mom was negatively vocal that he would pick up on that soon though. i am sorry you dont have more of a support system.
good luck, and i say do what feels right for you and your child.
welcome!!

kit_kats_mom replied: I nursed my first until she self weaned when I was pregnant. She was 23 months. I nursed my second until she was 25 months. I was thinking about starting to wean, just so I could get a good nights sleep, when I had a medical procedure done which required me to stop. She did fine. However, surprisingly, I sort of miss it sometimes. I had a wonderful support system and I'd educated those who I anticipated problems from. I just pretended like I had no idea that they were bothered and if anyone said anything, I said that it was working for us.

I guess that I just don't really give much of a hoot about other peoples opinions on how I raise my kids. My mantra "We do what works for our family, you do what works for yours"

Try not to feel pressured to give it up. Good luck.

mommy~to~a~bunch replied: I say it's up to you! Who cares what other people think? They are usually CLUELESS on BFing, and I really don't care about others' opinions about MY kids. I'M the mom, not them. As long as both you and your son are enjoying it, don't stop! There are still great benefits of nursing a toddler: http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/index.html .

Congratulations for nursing so long! Keep up the great work!!

abunky replied: thanks girls ,

PrairieMom replied: There are lots of people here who have done "extended" nursing and let their children self wean. If you can do it, and it is working for you, then more power to you.
Personally, I am a little creeped out and uncomfortable around people who are BF lap babies, but that is MY issue, and I keep it to my self. Why should you stop a bonding experience that you are having with your child because it makes other people uncomfortable? The most important relationship is the parent child one. Maybe just be mindful and discrete.

ZandersMama replied: I think you should do whats right for you and your baby. My oldest nursed for about a year and I wish now I nursed him longer. My wee one didnt last nearly as long because of medical issues but if it wasnt for that im sure I would still be nursing him now.

bawoodsmall replied: Why is is that people always feel the need to tell you what to do as a parent. If you feel that you want to nurse still then nurse. Tell your mom not to look..its not her child its yours and you are doing what you feel is right for your child.

Boo&BugsMom replied:
Yep. Ditto!

I am in the same boat as Tara really (and I don't like feeling that way, but I do and can't really explain why...like she said...my/our issue not anyone elses), but just because someone has an issue with something doesn't mean they should tell others that their way is wrong. That is why we have choices! There is no right or wrong, just differences. Others don't have to agree, but they should still be supportive, I think that is the key, to be supportive. I wish I could have breastfed longer than I did (a whopping one week ), because I really enjoyed it and saw the many benefits. Tell your mom she doesn't have to agree, but she should be supportive in your decisions and except them.

abunky replied: thanks girls ,

mysweetpeasWil&Wes replied: Well if it makes you feel any better, I'm nursing my toddler as I type. He is 18 months and I don't see him stopping anytime soon. I tried weaning him back in October becase my DH and I went away for two nights. He did great, but when I got home, he was back at it even more. So I just kept at it. I now know HE wasn't ready, so why force it. I admit to wanting to be done, but I think about how my first had such a hard time weaning off of his pacifier, which was way past 2 years, so why should this be any different. I really do enjoy the closeness with my son.

My mother disagrees as well and makes stupid comments like "well I just think it would be easier for you if you weaned him", which honestly, that's just another way of saying it would be easier on HER if I weaned him. Nursing your child is really YOUR choice. And doing it for however long you want is also YOUR choice. My mother didn't nurse at all and she just doesn't relate, which is fine, but don't tell me what to do!

I too have a har time nursing in front of my friends now that Wesley is older. I know that it sounds sorta sad, but I don't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. Same with out in public. But if someone were to ask me if I'm still BF, I would say yes. I NEVER imagined I would get this far, and when I had my first, I thought it was sorta strange to nurse past 12 months, but until you've BTDT, you just don't know how special it really can be. My point is, I'm really happy with my decision.

CantWait replied: I have my own opinion on the matter, but I'll keep it to myself.

The fact of the matter is, it is YOUR choice and no one elses.

maestra replied: I will add this- my youngest will be 3 next Friday and still nurses at night when she wants to fall asleep. I have no problem with this, and my husband gives me a little bit of a hard time, but oh well. And for the rest of my family/friends- we just don't talk about it.

abunky replied:
its great to see that you are kinda in the same boat with me , it makes me feel so much better , ...i'm getting alot of great addvice here and thanks you so much ladies for the help....i'm going to continue to do whats my son wants and no so much for my moms mouth LOL, .... thanks everyone ,

redchief replied: If your mom's giving you so much grief, why not move into a small apartment with your child so you don't have to listen to her. No matter how independent you want to be, it's difficult to be so when you're living under your parent's roof.

abunky replied:
, trust me i wish i could move out right now , my divorce was horrible , so i'm trying to save as much as i can to move...

mysweetpeasWil&Wes replied:
Hmmm Ed, my mom lives states away from me and I STILL hear it from her. I am a mom myself, so I have learned to let things slide when it comes to my own mother, but no matter how old we are, whether we're living near or far, I think moms will always feel they have the right to state their opinions. There is really no escaping it IMO, unless you just learn to ignore it.

redchief replied:
That was my advice... And I understand your situation is a tough one, but you must expect that as long as you're living under her roof, she will make her opinion known whether you like it or not. Heck, moms give their opinions to their daughters even when there's distance between them!

Is your continued BF preventing you from working a normal work schedule? Is your mother providing for you and your children? If either of these are the case, then perhaps she has a right and responsibility to discuss lifestyle changes with you. I'm not judging, just playing devil's advocate for your mom.

redchief replied:
That's funny, I was pretty much saying the same thing at the same time you were. Get out of my brain!

abunky replied:
see i pump and he always has plenty of breast milk left when i get home , i love my mom to death but maybe it doesnt help that i'm her only child and my dad leaves the house all the time, so she needs some one to nag at LOL , but i understand what you mean