im having twins....what do i do now? - help/advice

misslovey wrote: well hello everyone....i came across this site in hope that i could get some great advice....my name is heather, im 18 years old and im pregnant with twins....i just dont know how im going to do this...i mean i love kids and all and i think i will be able to deal with the kids themselves but what am i to do about financial problems and my living situtation....i only work at applebees as a host (making a mere $3 an hour) and i still live at home with my parents because im still in school....so if any of you have any advice as to want i should do please let me know either here or you can email me at heather.rimbey@gmail.com

thanks,
heather

CosmetologyMommy replied: Are u still with the father? Or is he going to help u with money?

PrairieMom replied: How far along are you? and what about the father? is he able to help you at all?
BTW, welcome! I hope you find this a good place for advice and support.

my2monkeyboys replied: Welcome to the boards, and congratulations! While it may seem like a tough thing now, I'm sure you'll do great, and there are lots of programs for women in these types of situations. First of all I would go to your local Dept of Social Services. They should be able to help see what programs you qualify for. Since you live at home and are in school, are you still covered by your father/mother's insurance? Also, if the father of the twins is in the picture, I'd certainly get child support from him. Unless of course you don't want him to have any visitation rights... then that's another matter all together. I think DSS would be the best place to start, though, regardless.
I hope to see you around here on the forums!

C&K*s Mommie replied: Willsmama, had the right information. Down here we call it DCF (Depart of Children and Families) I think it is the same thing, they are there as a go-to when things are tight for many families. They have aWIC program (Women, Infants, Children) where you can get voucher for specific foods and formula until your child is 5yrs old. There is Medicaid, and they will be able to determine if you qualify depending on your state. They have to take into account that your parents are in the home, as well as an unborn child. So that would make 4 members of that household, right there. Medicaid (at least for my state) is based on income.

Start there, they will steer you in the right direction. There is no shame in asking for help when you need it. Come back here, you are always Hope to see you around soon.

CantWait replied: Welcome to Parenting Club. I'm not sure what services are available in the US, but I'm sure there's many of the same agencies as there are in Canada that can help you out financially etc..

The father doesn't really have a choice in helping you out financially, unless he's not working, and even then you can noramlly get back pay.

Best of luck to you, things will work out.

Nina J replied: How far along are you? If your not too far along, you could possibly look for a higher paying job. That way you'll have a little more money. Or go to social services.
Are you still with the father? Is he able to help with finances? What about your parents, could they help you a bit?
Also, you can cut back on things for the baby's. You don't have to buy expensive baby clothes, and breastfeeding will save money on formula.

Good luck, and welcome to Parenting Club I hope to see you around.

GourmetCandleMOM replied: First of all.....take a deep breath....relax, it's going to be ok.

I was a teenage parent too. Seventeen actually, and also with TWINS. I was a senior in high school. I graduated (I filled the graduation gown, lol) and had my twins a week after I graduated. Their dad was only 16 when they were born, but 15 when I got pregnant . It was hard to finish school, and everyone told me I couldn't do it...that I SHOULDN'T

holley79 replied: First off Welcome to PC. There are a lot of wonderful people here. Congrats on the twins. I am Holley, 27 first time mom to Annika.

I don't really have any advice but if you ever need a place to vent or just need friends this is the place.

GourmetCandleMOM replied: OK, don't know what happened there...but my message sent itself halfway through, lol.

ANYWAY...

People told me I shouldn't do it. I could never raise them so young. Well, I made it my life mission to prove everyone wrong!!! Was I ready for them? NO. Am I happy I made the choice I made? I couldn't picture my life without them and I honestly don't know where I'd be if it wasn't for them. So, really, it's not as bad as you might be thinking right now. It can be a great thing! They are 12 now.

What about the dad of my twins you're probably thinking right? Well, we've been happily married for 7 1/2 years (the twins were the ring bearer and flower girl at age 5) and we have another daughter who just turned 5 last month. So, it all worked out fine. In a perfect world, dads would stick around, but it doesn't always happen. Just make sure that you have some kind of support whether it be your parents, siblings, family members, etc. It's SSOOO important to have someone beside you in all of it.
Good luck! If you ever need to talk you can always email me at rebeccahart05@hotmail.com

misslovey replied: well i appreciate all the welcomings and advice i will definitely consider it all....btw i am 5 months along as of monday march 20, 2006.....the babies dad wants to help with the children however me and him are no longer together...he is 24 and still chosses to live with his mother which is 3.5-4 hours away from me he works at a home depot so theres not much money there either....but i do appreciate ya'lls help and advice.....my parents are helping out alot too and my older sister and i are discussing living together when we can move out so that she can help me with the babies....oh and btw i found out on march 23, 2006 that i am having to identical little girls....i have chosen the name Jamie Lynn and Amber Marie.....that is their first and middle names btw not their whole first name....anyways yeah.....

na81 replied: Congratulations on the twins. BTW, I like the names. My sister's name is Jaime Lynn! I sent you a personal message when you first posted, but I don't know if you received it. I just wanted to say welcome and congratulations! Hope you decide to come here more often- this is a great place for advice, support or just to vent! Well, take care and feel free to PM me any time!!!

Buckles&Chains replied: Congrats on your girls!
I don't have any advice as I don't know the procedure's in the States (I'm in Australia).

Good luck!

Mommy2Isabella replied: First off Welcome, and Congrats on the TWINS! I was "having" twins. Now, just one ... in my opinion God's way of saying we wouldn't be able to handle both. There a good number of women on here who have had twins. As for being young ... I AM RIGHT THERE WITH YOU! I just turned 19 in January. I am about 20 weeks along. Due in August. The women and men on here are ALL very supportive. I wish you the best of luck and will pray for your safe delivery and the best in everything! Of course, I am always here to chat, I was put on bed rest so I am on the BOARD ALL THE TIME NOW!

MM'sMama replied: Fisrt off welcome and congrats on your twins girls. I hope you have a very happy and healthy 9 months.

I'm Karah 20, mommy to Brice who is 4 yrs (5 in July), and Caroline who is 6 months.

I know how scary this can be I had my son at 15, and lord knows I was scared out of my mind. Like you said you do have family support and that does make a whole world of difference. I can honestly say I don't know what I would have done without the help of my family and my DH's. How does his family feel about it? Are they willing to help too? When I was PG I had no job DH only worked at a local carwash making next to nothing and we were both still in school. But some how we hung in there and managed and we are doing great now. And at 24 I really hope he is ready to step up and take care of this baby and help you. Just remember to hang in there honey things have a way of working themselves out. Feel free to PM me if you need someone to talk to or anything at all.

NEWMOM05 replied: Congrats on your girls I know that as for social services you should qualify for WIC an dprobably food stamps. I saw a phone number where they are giving away free diaper genies to mom or moms to be of multiples. Anyone know about that and other things she could look into that way? I'm not that knowledgable.

Good luck with everything. We all are hear to offer support, advice and just to let you offload if needed. This is a great site.