bedrest at 8 weeks - worry mom

bedrest at 8 weeks wrote: hi there, i am new on this site, i am now at 12 weeks and have been on bedrest starting at 8 weeks. i am 35 and got married 5 months ago. we both planned to start a family right away and 3 months later we found out i was expecting. this will be my first. everything went along well until i started to bleed and was told i have fibroids growing inside my uterus which are causing problems. it is competing for space with the baby and right now the baby happens to be 9 cm and the the fibroid right next to it is 12 cm. i still have 6 months to go and i am on very strict bedrest. i can only get up to go to the washroom. we live with my in-laws and they bring all my meals to me in bed. i am a bit of a worry person and it makes it 10 times worse being in bed b/c all i do is think about the baby. if i bleed i worry, if i cramp which i get a lot of i worry, i feel nausia all the time so i worry when i bring up b/c my cramps then get worse....... my latiest worry now is b/c i am 35 i have been asked if i want to get the amnio done. i am at greater risk to have one done b/c of the fibroid growth. then we both think we have no history of disoders of anykind on either side so why bother. i worry worry and worry.
i sit in bed watch a bit of tv, go on the net and read the odd magazine. i am motivated right now to do nothing
has anyone had fibroids and b/c i only just turned 35 is it really a big deal to get the amnio done? i mean if i was 34 would that really make a difference? what is so trajic about 35? overall i have been very healthy. can anyone share any info with me and help make the next 6 months go easier.......

mama3x replied: Hi and welcome to the boards! CONGRATULATIONS on your being pg! I'm Dionne, mommy of 2, pg with my last one. I was born/raised and am still living in Hawai`i.

Many here, especially on the Jan-Apr Club are very supportive. Since you are on bed rest, this is a great way to pass some of your time. Reading and writing may help as well as getting hooked on soap operas or other dramas (just not too stressful or emotional). Someone I know of put together a scrapbook for baby while on bed rest and designed the nursery.

I have been there with the worrying about every cramp, twinge, pain, spot, discharge (TMI?), twang in the back, headache, constant nausea - you name it, I have worried about it. My advice about worry is to allow yourself to do so. Don't drive yourself into fits by trying not to worry or trying to ignore what you are feeling about things. Read the "What to Expect" books, those are upbeat and positive, encouraging and informative.

And some drs. do make a big deal about being 35+. Well I had my 2nd child last year at 35. I declined everything - the triple-marker, the amnio, and whatever else is usually "required" at that age. DH and I have no family history of anything. My OB was right there with me because he doesn't make a big deal out of 35. This time, I am 36 and I again declined the amnio (my OB wanted to do the triple-marker though) and whatever else there was. However I did go for the 2 ultrasounds so far (1 more in about 6 wks).

If you want to, we can hook up as email buddies or just a friends here on the board. For this pg it's taken me all of the 21 wks to feel better. Part of it was residual from my last pg.

Take care of yourself ok?

kit_kats_mom replied: I don't have any great input on bedrest because thankfully, i've never been there...this control freak would have major issues with that. LOL

Anyway, about the amnio, honestly it is not a necessary test. With my first pregnancy we had none of the "elective" tests done. Fact is that they often give false positives and unless you would just want to know if your child was at risk for downs or something so that you could prepare in advance, then I wouldn't even bother.

Try not to worry yourself, take care and think positive, healthy baby thoughts.

A&A'smommy replied: First of all Welcome and congratulations on your pregnancy... secondly I wouldn't get the amnio done unless you were really worried about your baby having down syndrom or something, I'm scared of them at any age (i'm 18). I was lucky enough to have an easy pregnancy so I can't offer to much advice I just wanted to let you know that if you need to talk we are here. Oh and one thing try try try not to worry too much its not good for you, stress is VERY bad for pregnancy (at any age) my friend had TWO miscarriages because of stress one of them being VERY early on. You don't have too much longer left just try to enjoy what you can! And lastly ((((HUGS)))) for your hard time!

ediep replied: Hi amd welcome!!! Congrats on your pregnancy....Try to relax! All of that worrying isn't good for you or the baby!! I have no advice on bedrest, but I found out I have fibriods when I was pregnant with Jason. They saw them at my first ultrasound. The doc said he will keep an eye on them if they don't grow, it won't be a big deal. Thankfully, they didn't cause any problems and I now have a beautiful, active 2 year old!
Good luck!

momof2girls replied: Honestly Id being going nuts, but then again you have to do what is best for the baby.
I have a close friend that this happened to, her Dr basically told her to stay in bed and she did until almost the 2nd trimester, after that the bleeding stopped she also had fibroids and that it what was actually bleeding... not anything due to the baby
now she has a baby that is fine and healthy but she had a rough start.

try to get some things to read, start a journal, its very healing.. listen to music, a good book can really get your mind off of things, although its hard not to worry Im sure.

I wish you all the luck!!! and I hope all goes well for you!!!
keep us updated!

bedrest at 8 weeks replied: thanks for the kind words i have never been in a discussion on the internet before and it's nice to talk to people who are going through the same things
i have decided i do need to relax more......my husband keeps telling me the same thing....but by nature i think i am a worry person
for now my cramps have gone down and i do go for a 2nd opinion this friday regarding the fibroid growth
that fibroid right now is way bigger than the baby, i am really big....almost as if i was carrying twins
the doctor will firgure out exactly what this fibroid is doing and also to talk about the amnio
my husband and i have had some lengthy discussions over it and i have to say it is not easy getting it off your mind
i do feel better after talkiong it over and my husband knows how to make sense and reason really well
i will let you all know that the 2nd opinion has to say

Kirstenmumof3 replied: I'm sorry you have to go through this! I wanted to offer my support! Maybe you need to start a hobby while you are in bed, something to take your mind off of things. Like knitting or crocheting. Try not to worry! I had a friend who had the same condition you are describing. She was able to go through her pregnancy without going on bedrest and her baby was fine.

bedrest at 8 weeks replied: the bedrest is hard. i got married 5 months ago so i do have things that can keep me busy like my wedding album. i worked on it for a couple days and then put it aside. i get really bad cramps that put me off everything for a week at a time. i get such severe cramps that at times i cannot stand, getting in and out of bed is a challenge. my cramps are worse than the monthly cramps, add to it shooting pains, pinched nerve and the feeling you get when one goes for a run on a full stomach...........all roled in one
no position seems to be of confort
i also get this sensation like somthing is trying to come out of me
for the last couple days i have been on t3's every 2-3 hours
these are some of the things i had never heard of from my friends

bedrest at 8 weeks replied: hi there, i am back again........18 wks now
does anyone out there have major pain from fibroids?
in the last few weeks i have had such bad hip, lower back and lower stomach pains
on some nights i have taken up to 8 t3's......makes one feel like a zombie
i am now left with this really bad right hip pain.....feels like someone kicked my hip really hard
i try hot baths, hot water bottle.......has anyone tried something else that has helped them?
sometimes it is just nice to chat with someone going through the same thing

A&A'smommy replied: ((((BIG HUGS))))) awww I wish I could help you but I didn't have problems like that. I hope that the pain will go away for you soon that sucks so bad that you don't get to enjoy this special time. Keep us updated and let us know how you doing when you can! ((HUGS))

mama3x replied: It actually sounds like you may have sciatica.

This time around I am having some bad right hip pains (both in the back and front as well as along the inside of the right side of my pelvis, right thigh) with less severe pain on the left. BAH

I am also having lower back pains, especially on the right side.

I wish I could give you some form of relief but I haven't found one yet. Can't use heat since it's too hot here! Am hoping to try massage therapy or head for the chiropractor since I found out medical will partially cover.

Oh - actually lying on a tennis ball helps a bit. It's totally sore when I'm on the tennis ball but feels a bit better when I get off.

Much luck and take care!!!!!

bedrest at 8 weeks replied: so i am not alone
the pain drains me so i can't do anything all day and i still have 22 weeks to go.....
i have my 19 week ultrasound this friday, that will be my 5th ultrasound
they say this is when they tell you if the baby has all the major organs
i hope all goes well
i still don't leave the house
once every 2-3 weeks, makes it really hard b/c it is the same old stuff day in day out
i am not sure if i can feel the baby move yet, if it is moving the pain won't let me feel it
i only go on line when i can sit up long enough at the computer....
chat again later

mitchzgirl replied: I have had really bad sciatica since about 8 weeks. My back is very out of allignment, like an S was laid on top of my back and that's how god decided to shape it. It's not the normal S, but my spine is curved, my tailbone is actually in my right buttcheek. Now add a new 90 degree angle dip towards the front. I just try laying on my right side. I wanted to offer my encouragment and let you know i'm here! Anything worth fighting for is worth having, right? The amnio can pose risks for anyone, I wouldn't personally get it done. Try making stuff for the baby to help pass the time. Take up poetry or write a journal. I wish you the best of luck and my thoughts are with you hun!

MamaMartie replied:
Hi
Congratulations on your pregnancy and your new marriage! How exciting!

I am sorry you're having such a rough pregnancy. I've been on bedrest before, but at the end not the begining and I've never had a fibroid, so I don't think I am much help.

I did see a "Birth Day" show where the mother had a large bibriod removed half way through a pg and went on to have healthy baby boy (via c-section b/c of the scar from her operation). So maybe you could keep an eye out for that on tv and you'll learn more or at least feel better.

Hang in there, you are half way through!

bedrest at 8 weeks replied: today i am 20 weeks!...........half way, that sure feels good

the way things have been going it seemed like forever

i am having better days, had an ultrasound last week and they said baby looks well but they couldn't fully see the heart so i go back in two weeks

the pain has tamed down for now but i still get the bad hip pain every other day

i don't know if it is a boy or girl but i think i want to know now......i don't want to call it "IT" anymore..........not sure if they will tell us

i am still under strict house arrest.....bedrest, i still feel i am going nuts

but i have started to work on my wedding album again, can't wait until that is done

just touching base with everyone

GavinsMommy replied: I thought you said you were 12 weeks? Your original post says 12 but the last post says that you are now at 20 weeks. I'm confused! Lol. Anyways...this is my first pregnancy, it's almost over for me. But good luck to you and take it easy.

OOPS! Didn't realize you brought your post back...lol. I was wondering how you went from 12 to 20 in a matter of minutes. Lol. Well good luck on hitting 20 weeks!!

jcc64 replied: Hi there and welcome. Wow, you're doing your whole pg in bed- that's a devoted mama!
I know sitting around gives you LOTS of free time that you can fill up with worry. I'm a worrier by nature as well, and it sort of goes with the territory of becoming a parent.
Just try not to let it consume your every waking thought- it's very unhealthy for you and your baby (oh great, now you can worry about worrying )
But if you find yourself obsessing and unable to think of or do anything else, you may want to consider the fact that it's an anxiety disorder, which should be addressed by your ob/gyn or family dr. I know, b/c I have one, have been through more than one pg with one, and it's very difficult to manage at times. The good news is that there are many ways to treat it, even while pg, if you wind up with that conclusion.
Now, about the fibroids. While I have no personal experience with any sort of pg related complications, my sitter is at the exact same point in her pg as you are, and she has fibroids and pain very similiar to what you describe. She hasn't been put on bedrest, is in fact caring for my toddler as well as her own, so obviously her situation isn't as severe as your own, but I know it bothers her alot. I've since come to understand that 30% of all women have fibroids at some point, and many are never even aware that they have them. I know pg changes things, but hopefully with all the care and caution you are receivng, things will work out fine for you and your baby.
As far as the amnio, I had my last baby at 37, and refused the test, against my dr's advice. I wasn't willing to accept the risk of miscarriage, especially since I intended to continue the pg whether the baby had defects or not. It's your choice, if you don't feel comfortable, don't do it.
Good luck, and keep posting, we're very good at passing time here.

bedrest at 8 weeks replied: i am doing better right now. my husband took me out for a movie, dinner and even dropped me off at a friends shower for an hour. that was such a breath of fresh air. these days just that much will get me excited.

i finished my wedding album and now i am starting to surf the net for what different baby things they got out there

the bedrest is still in full force.......i went to the doc this week and she was very pleased with my progress

i don't have any financial worries, thank god for that, my company has a really good plan and my husband has a good job........i have read for some money has been a real worry

this is our 1st x'mas together and i can't do anything or buy anything for anyone, that sucks

i can now feel the baby move a lot, especially at night.......at times it even keeps me up

i get my 6th ultrasound next friday, i will be 22 weeks, i'm hoping we will be able to see if it is a boy or girl.........i didn't want to know before but now i don't think i can hold back, not sure if they wil tell us but of course we won't be telling anyone.......they will have to wait for the big day

that's all for now