Would you ever - No arguments please

My2Beauties wrote: No hurt feelings by this at all - I promise. I had a terrible dream last night, it was so weird. It was about death. I had a dream that I was looking through some pictures and that there was a picture in there of my aunt laying dead in a casket. So in my dream someone had actually taken pictures of her laying there, it was terrible because her mouth was open instead of shut and all kinds of unimaginable things you wouldn't normally see a corpse in a casket looking like and it tied into another dream I had that she actually did pass away months ago, so it was terrible. I hate dreams like that. It really bothered me. BUt anyways, I woke up thinking to myself why on Earth would I dream that someone took a picture of a corpse? I have been at funeral homes, you know how they have 2 people showing in seperate rooms usually and Brian and I walked past one room one time to get to the other and we saw people taking pictures of the person's body laying in the casket Brian was like OMG that is too weird. When I was 16 a girlfriend of mine was killed in a car accident and I thought I remember someone taking a picture of her in her casket as well that I didn't know who they were. Would any of you ever do this and if so, I just wondered why? My thoughts is that the mental picture of that person laying there is captured in your mind forever, I know with each funeral I've been to I can remember exactly how they looked laying there. It's just an honest question, I don't want anyone to get upset if they do this, I just want to understand why??? No arguing please.

MomToMany replied: I did when my dad died. I never thought it was freaky. You are so overwhelmed with emotions at the time that you might not remember everything clearly. I'm glad I have pictures, because I can barely remember it now.

Maddie&EthansMom replied: Nope, couldn't do it.

Insanemomof3 replied: As you know, I lost my sister 2 years ago (almost 3 now). When I went to see her body, I wished I had a camera. In my grief, I didn't think about it.

My reason...was because her WHOLE life, she had one mess after another. She was always hurting. Emotionally and everything. She was always sick. Something was always going on. When I saw her laying there, she FINALLY looked so peaceful, and happy. She was finally in NO pain, no turmoil and it was the sweetest thing I ever saw. I loved her so much, I just wish I could have captured that peaceful look in a photo so I could see it forever. Yes, the picture in my mind will always be there, but after time memories can fade, not disappear, but fade a little, they are not as black and white as a photo.

I know, I make no sense, and maybe I am a little morbid, but that is my thought.

coasterqueen replied: I'd honestly have to say I've never heard of someone taking pictures of someone who's passed on. With all the people I've buried it never crossed my mind. Honestly I don't think funeral homes do a great job of making them look like they did before so I wouldn't want to take a picture to remember them that way. I know when we laid my aunt to rest this past September I would have never known it was her in that casket, ugh that memory alone will last me a lifetime, wouldn't want a picture of that.

Edit to say oddly enough I still remember exactly what my grandpa looked like when we buried him 19 (or 20) years ago. I can clearly remember all the loved ones I've buried and what they looked like.

DansMom replied: My mother took pictures of her mother on her deathbed, but before she had passed. I think for me, it might depend on my closeness with the person and whether it meant something to record that life event, but I probably would not be inclined to take a photograph---it would not feel right to me somehow. In some cultures it is customary to make a deathmask---a mold. That is more tangible, and more along the lines of something I might consider, but also probably would not do.

5littleladies replied: I don't know if I would or not. My grandmother is the only person I've had close to me die and the thought never occured to me-I don't think in that case I would have. I do have a friend though whose father died when he was young and his mother took pictures at the funeral for him to see when he got older-so he could have some closure and that I can understand. I just don't know for me personally though......

booey2 replied: I hadn't heard of it til I say pictures many years ago in my grandmothers house of a little baby in a casket and I being child asked who that was. They told me it was one of my aunts who had died as a baby. I was really glad that they did this so I could know about my aunt as they hadn't told us about her yet. I would probably do it if someone close to me died.

My2Beauties replied:
Well now that does give me a good insight into it, I never looked at it that way. Someone who was suffering maybe and miserable for the last years of their life finally being at peace.

My2Beauties replied:
That is my other thing, I remember every SINGLE LAST person's funeral I've been to and what they looked like, I could tell you what they were wearing and everything. I mean those images stay etched in my mind. I understand where insanemomof3 is coming from, I just wouldn't want to look at that to remember them by, it would seem that I would want to remember the good times when they were alive and look at pictures of them living.

CosmetologyMommy replied: I could never but I have seen pics of my great grandmother in the casket and it creeped me out.

coasterqueen replied:
You know, I probably would do that too. I don't know why, that seems so different. I think if I had a baby die at birth or there after I'd want to take pictures too, because you probably wouldn't have many pictures of them anyways and it could keep the memory alive.

luvmykids replied:
Me too.

MomToJade&Jordan replied:
I was thining about my great-grandfather when I first read this topic. He didn't have a difficult life, but passed on nearly 20 years after his wife did. That was a long 20 years for him and at the end he really wanted to see her again. The peaceful look on his face made me believe that he had infact re-united with my great-grandmother. I think I would have liked to have a picture of that.

gr33n3y3z replied: I could never do it either and I remember both of my parents to this day what they looked like and what they wore at that time and My Mom was burried over 16 years ago.

But I have seen it done
I guess its one of those things Its not wrong either way

My2Beauties replied:
Yes now this I can understand.

TeagansMom609 replied: My Grandfather took pictures of my Grandmother in her casket. I remember watching him do it and thought it was pretty weird. Im not sure if I personally would do it or not.

TANNER'S MOM replied: My step mom who died of cancer..was so peaceful.. Her and my father were married such a short time before she she found she had cancer. She looked awful..I mean awful Refused to have her picture made that way. She was 40 years old and looked 60 or 70.. she was in so much pain.

But she had a peace I had never seen. I was there the moment she took her last breath..and I have never forgotten that moment..Man..this is choking me up a little..

And when I went with my father I was so surprised and he was too. Her face was so at peace..so pain free. She knew her race was run..she didn't have to fight for her next breath. My dad has said he wished he had a picture like that but he felt it to morbid. He remember the bad times..and the suffering..he wants to remember the ending peace.

Just last weekend we went and bought her a headstone. She had been a year without one due to the expense. The funeral was finally paid for ..with no insurance..so we saved enough for the stone. My Dad said he felt so much better giving time to heal before he went to get her something. We picked the prettiest stone.. It has horses on it. A barn scene..a saddle over the fence..like she just got done riding away into the sunset. It says Until We Meet Again.. It was so pretty.. I am so proud of that. I will take a picture of that.

Let me just caution anyone who doesn't have life insurance..to get some. We had a small grave side service..with No insurance..and it cost me and my father almost 7 grand by the time it was done. She wasn't my mother but I helped my dad pay for it. Her family didn't pitch in. So, please take care of your family that way..it is so important..

Way off subject but I needed to say it.

BAC'sMom replied: No I would not, but I do have members of my family that have.
It freaked me out!

punkeemunkee'smom replied: I do not think I ever would-simply because I do not believe that my loved one is there anymore-I have also never seen someone that I would want to remember that way. I would rather look back on the good times, I suppose I do understand that someone might want to have a last image-and I do understand it more in the case of a baby,I can understand wanting at least one picture of them to remember


LeeAnn I am sorry about your dream! I hate nights like that! Here is to peaceful sleep tonight!

1lilpeanut2love replied: [FONT=Arial][COLOR=purple][SIZE=1]

I do not think I could take a picture of a dead person. I have only really seen one person in a coffin and I would have never thought to take his picture. Also, when my mom died(I was 8 years old) she had a closed casket. Death is a very hard thing for me. I would not want to remember someone for how they looked when they died, but for how they were when they were living. Also, I have watched such movies as FACES OF DEATH-- they are freaky movies. They show people dieing and I did not like it. It was crazy.

My3LilMonkeys replied: Personally, I wouldn't. I would rather remember people in their life than their death.

3_call_me_mama replied: I know several people that have done it as a sense of closure and a way for them to grieve on theri own time. I ahev lost several people very close to me.All four of my grandparents passed before I was 13 years old. And all with in a 2 year period. It was an emotionally exhausting adn draing coupel years. I wish I had pictures of tehm in their final peaceful state to know what they looked like at peace. I remember their tortured appearence that they held in their last coupel years all too well. but the peaceful face before then i was too young to remember. I really don't feel that a loved ones passing is any more difficult wether it be a child or adult. A last picture to remember someone by in my mind isn't any different for an elderly person or an infant.

CantWait replied: There are a couple people that have definetly given some great insight into this. My grandmother has pictures of someones funeral and with them in the casket, I think it had something to do with the culture (not really sure though). I just might take a picture of my grandma though when she passes away. She means so much to me, that I think it might be very healing.

A&A'smommy replied: I don't know... maybe depending on it is....

Actually way back when they use to do that it was customary.. something they just did... in fact Jeremiah and i were going through some of his grandmothers pictures and there were several pictures of dead people I found it kinda creepy though

Hillbilly Housewife replied: yes. We took pictures at my grandfather's funeral. He died of cancer, and he looked peaceful. Abd the flowers were all so pretty...

since my grandmother lost her BIL within a day or 2, there were 2 funerals... and my mom and I thought it might be a good idea to take pics, so we could all grieve properly when the shock wore off.

mysweetpeasWil&Wes replied: I've actually never been to a funeral, only memorial services for family members that were cremated. I want to be cremated myself, and so do most of my loved ones, so I personally hope I never have to witness an open casket. I would of course go to one if asked, out of respect, but I would never take a picture. We all grieve in different ways, so although I don't quite understand it myself, to each their own.

MamaJAM replied: I would never take a picture of a dead body....in the casket of anywhere else.

Kaitlin'smom replied: I guess it would depend. We just laied to rest grandpa and NO I would not take a pic of that, he did not look good and I really dont want to remeber it but I do. I do wish I had one of my each friends that died. I miss them and they died soo young. I still can rember seeing Doug laying there very clearly in my head and that was 11 years ago. His death was never clearly explained. I wont go into it. So Yes in some case I wish I did but in others no.

danahas4monkeys replied: My grandmother does but only before everyone comes in. I think if it helpsgo ahead, I personally wish I had taken a few of my mom. Now there was a crazy aunt at my mom's funeral who was taking pictures like it was a party that was tacky and she was asked to leave!

Dana

fashionmumofboys replied: Don't know if I would or not.

Hillbilly Housewife replied:
Definitely tacky when eberyone is there... it's a private thing.

3xsthefun replied: I'm not really sure if I would or not.

I remember when DH's grandma passed away, DH's sister asked their mom if she wanted to take any pictures. At the time I thought it was strange. But then again it wasn't either. They didn't take any pictures though.