Whose responsibility is it? - vent about my inlaws

PrairieMom wrote: Last week on vacation both of the other kids that were there were sick. There was a 1 year old and a 3 year old, and they both had very congested chests with nasty coughs, and green snotty noses. My kids were perfectly healthy.
All the kids were playing with each others toys, the 1 yo kept putting The Boys toys in her mouth.
I tried to keep Ally's stuff up and away from them all, but I wasn't always successful.

I bought a bottle of hand sanitizer and put it on the counter for everyone, but I was the only one who used it. I acutally watched my MIL wipe my nieces nose with her bare fingers and then try to pick up Ally! When I stoped her her response was "Well, if she hasn't had it before, she's gonna get it now" Okay, she's 4 MONTHS OLD!

Am I unreasonable to expect that my SIL and Cousin would watch their sick kids and make sure they aren't putting our stuff in their mouths, and to expect them to wash their hands to at least TRY to not get every one else sick?

Like I said, I tried to wash Ben's hands and use the sanitizer and all that, but It was impossible to keep them and our toys seperate.

amymom replied: I agree with you. AND it is hard to get other parents to see that it makes a difference.

Sorry, and yeah your kids will probably get those germs. It is too bad that they do not consider that she is only 4 mos old.

mom2my2cuties replied: I agree with you - however I admit I am pretty "germaphobic" about stuff. I don't want the kids getting sick. And if it can be prevented it should be. Too bad you didn't have any lysol wipes and things to wash Ally's toys with. She is so young - and doesn't need to get sick.

PrairieMom replied:
I kept throwing the plush stuff in the washing machine, and the hard stuff in the dish washer.
I was just so frusterated at their total disregard ya know?

mom2my2cuties replied: Yup I do know I went through the same with my inlaws for a couple months they didn't see or talk to us or the kids because we had it out something major over thier 6 year old punched my 1 year old and they thought it was 'Ok'

PrairieMom replied:

Talk about timing. Guess who just woke up with a fever? Poor kids gonna miss school again today. Thats 3 classes in a row, and he was really looking foward to taking his seashells to all his friends at school.

Hillbilly Housewife replied: Oh that SUCKS. I know what you mean.

Last week the daycare kids showed up here with a runny nose... and they were coughing everywhere. They wouldn't even put their hand in front of their mouth...

I had to "teach" them that we cough in our ELBOWS. (less germs on the hands that way. ) I also kept a bottle of antibacterial on hand... we used it everytime the kids touched their noses or forgot to cough in their elbows and did it in their hands. Instead of running up and down the stairs everytime to get to the bathroom, ya know?

I sanitized all the hard stuff and washed all the soft stuff... but... my kids have been sick all weekend. They cough with a rolling chest cough. Naomie hasn't been sleepig well these last 2 nights...hence mommy hasn't either. She has a slight fever so she's stuck on my boobs like a fat kid on cake.

Knock on wood...neither dh nor I are sick.

MyBrownEyedBoy replied:

Sorry to, but LMAO at that image. Tara, sorry Ben got sick. I hope the Girl doesn't get it. And that was totally rude and disrespectful. Everyone has always been very careful around Logan, but I think that is due to his "special" status. No one wants to be responsible for getting the heart kid sick.

boyohboyohboy replied: Tare hope the boy gets well quickly, and the girl doesnt catch it at all....
i would have been livid, i was clenching my teeth when i read your post just thinking about it...
i wish people were more considerate.

luvmykids replied: I'm more suprised at the other moms that at your MIL, considering it's been a while and maybe she's forgotten what misery it is for those little ones but the other moms who have kids sick RIGHT NOW should have been showing more concern. When my kids are under the weather at a family function I'm extra diligent about making sure they don't play with the other kids toys, keep noses wiped, etc. Hope the Boy feels better soon

punkeemunkee'smom replied: I have always wondered at the idiocy of saying 'It's just the common cold' when parents bring their sick kids around.....UMMMM [B]it wouldn't be common if sick people would stay home when they have it!!! Sorry your kids are sick now Tara...I would call them and say something like 'I am so sick of the stupid parents who let their kids come to school sick(like you aren't realizing it came from them) now poor Ben is running a fever ' I have done that more than once when a friend has brought some sort of nasty germs over

PrairieMom replied:
This morning I am thinking real hard about sending them thankyou notes. I know that sick happens, but good grief. It wouldn't be so upsetting if they had at least TRIED to keep their germs to them selves.
And as for my MIL, she is famous for her bad judgement.

Boo&BugsMom replied: I would be more upset at the fact that the mom or dad didn't keep them home if they were that sick! That is just irresponsible parenting if you ask me. I would be livid too.

Kaitlin'smom replied: I am sorry did I get that right the mom of this sick kids did nothing?

kristy-n-chad replied: That stinks! I hope he feels better soon.

lisar replied: I totally agree with you 100%. I think they should have tried to watch them more closely. I would have done the same thing you did.

mummy2girls replied: I agree they should of been more aware and try to keep the germs from spreading. I hate when people do that! If jenna is sick I dont bring her near family and her cousins expecially because of that reason!

GRRRRR to your inlaws!

My2Beauties replied: Some people just don't think! I would be LIVID!

TANNER'S MOM replied: Girl I know what you mean. My kids are grown and I still look at it and think what are they doing.

But when Tanner was a baby, my nephew and him where only months apart, and they did baby stuff. They could be each laying in the floor each sucking a bottle and suddenly decide to trade, the same with a pacifer. THey would do it themselves. It was so hard to keep them apart when they were sick. But we did.. back then we didn't have clorox wipes.. my sister in law and myself would keep a sink full of bleach water and wipe and until we couldn't wipe anymore and we would put one child in a swing, one in the floor, one basket of sick child toys one backet of well baby toys. It can be managed but you have to all be helpful.

That being said..my brother in law used to get offended when my his son would come over and ask to hold the baby, and I would say sure please wash your hands first. He said is my son not good enough, I said our own children wash up first and so do we. But let me tell you I was thinking...look under his nails.. heck no he isn't clean enough..lol

I know where you are coming from.. hope Ben gets better soon and Ally doens't get it!

Maddie&EthansMom replied: I feel sorry for those kids who were sick. They needed to be home resting. I feel awful when I have a cold. I kept Ethan home from school yesterday b/c he was coughing. No fever, no other symptoms, but when their immune system is down they can catch everything and get so much worse. I've always done this and my kids are only sick for a couple of days vs weeks. So no, I don't understand the moms who drag their kids around everywhere.

I'm sorry they got the Boy sick. I bet you will be a good momma and keep him in so he can get better a lot faster.

hawkshoe replied: While I think the mom of the sick kids should have done everything she could to help ensure that your children didn't get sick, ultimately that is your responsibility. Had it been me, I would not have let my children play with their toys or visa versa. I would have also been sanitizing everything and often. Still, chances are your kids probably would have gotten ill just being around them.

Generally when my kids are sick and others are involved, I call them to let them know and will change my plans if at all possible.

punkeemunkee'smom replied:

I know that feeling is the reason soooo many parents take their kids out when they are sick and should be at home. That and the mentality of kids get sick... But I really beg to differ that it is my responsibility to babysit for parents who are #1) too lazy or #2) too stupid OR selfish to care if their sick child is spreding germs to everyone else around just so their schedule is not interupted.

Hillbilly Housewife replied: I wanted to mention earlier... and i'm sure you know this because of where you work.. but by the time the kids are snotty and gross, they usually aren't contagious anymore.

ediep replied: oh man, I would have been so PO-ed!!! That would have potentially ruined my vacation! I hate sick germs everywhere! The fact that your MIL wiped a green snotty nose with her hand is so disgusting that I almost gagged reading it....and then tried to pick up the baby....well..I think I would have screamed and lunged to get the baby first if I was there!!

it is completey the sick kids parents responsibility to keep their noses clean, their hands clean, get them some medication, and keep their toys separate from your kids

cameragirl21 replied: that is highly obnoxious both on the part of the sick kids' parents and your MIL, she should know better.
Just fyi, if it makes you feel any better, sometime back I became really sick with strep the day after I took pictures of a six month old baby and I completely freaked out, thinking I got her sick and spoke to my ob/gyn about it and she said that babies who are over 3 months but less than a year have a very strong immune system and that if the baby were closer to 18 months, then she'd probably get sick but a 6 month old wouldn't and sure enough, when I called her mom to inform her that I got sick, she said the baby was fine.
Hope the boy gets better and that your MIL knows better next time.
It's impossible, btw, to keep kids' toys apart when a group is playing because they are bound to get into each other's toys, especially when kids see toys that aren't theirs.

PrairieMom replied: The whole thing just sucked. I think it should have been a group effort on everyones part to make sure that everyone's kids stayed healthy.
The thing that I keep thinking about was last year the my germy little one year old niece was 2 months old and I got to meet her for the first time. I was so sick with a cough, sore throat and body aches, so I never went near her. It was sad and hard for me, but I didn't want to be the one who got her sick. I would have apprecieated the same behavior from her mother this year ya know?
Oh well. It is what it is, just the first cold of the season.

gr33n3y3z replied: I agree with you

I just cant see why they couldnt help to keep the germs down
and the nose thing with out a tissue was gross and not washing her hands and then picking up your daughter

Boo&BugsMom replied:
I've heard this before, but I don't really buy it. Even when I send a daycare child to get a doctor's note, I have not had a single doctor who will put "child is no longer contagious" because they really don't know for sure. I'm still cautious of it.

PrairieMom replied:
I don't really buy into it either. I'm sure its true for some bugs, but not all, and I have no idea what they had.
I know that the 1yo was sick the whole week before and my inlaws were babysitting her, so my MIL could have spread it to my kids too. with her awesome hygene pratices it is highly possible. About 1/2 way through our week with them she made the comment that she had watched Morgan all last week and now she was starting to feel sick too.

C&K*s Mommie replied: A missed vacation due to sick children is nothing compared to the peace of mind I would have knowing that I was not exposing other children to illness unecessarily.

Sorry your vaca was ruined. Hope The Boy feels better soon.