What should I do

BilCon32 wrote: 3 weeks ago I was told by my 4 year old son's teacher that he said the F work. We'll He was punished when he got home & could not have any friends over. Yesterday I got a email the he said the B word twice. we were going to take him to a pizza place & I stopped that. I told him that if he talks nasty like that again I will bring the soap out.
I asked him where he has heard this & he says his friend at day care.
I will be talking to the day care on Monday.
I swear I felt about 2 inches high when she told me that. The only thing I know to do is take things away & when his friends come over let him tell them he is grounded.


Thanks for listening

hawkshoe replied: I feel your pain. Unfortunately, kids will pick up things they hear and then repeat them at inoportune times. Your punishing him at the end of the day probably has little effect on him. I would think that the teacher should discipline him when it happens. If this was his first time saying the word, he should just be told that it is not acceptable to use that word as it can hurt other peoples feelings and leave it at that. If the word usage continues then the teacher should put him in a time out. Kids that age do not understand what they are saying, only that it gets a reaction.

gr33n3y3z replied: yeah they pick up all kinds of bad words there
The best you can do is explain those are not nice words to say and if he repeats them again you will take his toys away and ground him from playing
I hope things work out for you

CantWait replied: Just wanted to mention also, because I don't know if you're serious about the soap thing or not, it can be poisonous and cause death.

amynicole21 replied: My dd has said things like that at daycare, too. We didn't make a huge deal about it and as far as I know it hasn't happened in a while. It's inevitable that they'll hear the words and try to test the boundaries. I think you've done what you can for now.

boyohboyohboy replied: I also wanted to say, if you were serious about the soap thing, thats really a bad idea imho.
also if you make a bid deal out of him swearing then he is more likely to do it. i think i would sit him down and explain that some people use words that they shouldnt, and if he isnt sure if its a bad word he shouldnt say it until he talks to you about it.
explain that these words hurt and are wrong to use.
i agree that talking to the daycare is important. how do they handle it there when he or another child swears? i would hope they dont make a public spectical of it.
good luck, i am sure its just a phase...

is there anywhere else he might be hearing it other then at school? does he ride a bus? or any other play groups?

BilCon32 replied: no, I was just scaring him with the soap thing hoping that would help. The teacher did put him in time out & he did get punished at school but I thought with what he did on Fri. & us going to go to the pizza place wasn't good so we didn't go. I'm hoping this will stop soon


Thanks

jacobsmama replied: Hi, Nice to meet you. I"m so sorry that this is happening. My son went through this too he is a little younger. I just tried to ignore it as much as possible because he did do it worse when I made a big deal of it. I think you are doing all you can. Make sure that he knows too that if other kids or adults say those words it isn't nice and they shouldn't but sometimes they do. That way he knows he may here it but it just isn't nice. Good luck!

mckayleesmom replied: My 3 year old is a little sponge also. We have what we call a POTTY WORD LIST....when she says something naughty, I tell her that little girls should not say those things...its disgusting to hear a pretty little girl say those things.....Then I tell her to add it to her POTTY WORD LIST......Sometimes when she hears a word she is not sure of...she will ask me if it is a potty word and wether we need to add it. I think it helps to remind them what that word is when you hear them say it. I don't make a big deal out of it, unless the word persists.

BilCon32 replied: I haven't heard anything from the school lately so that is good. When he had to tell his friends that day that he was grounded I don't think he liked that.
He is very sick now with fever & alot of bathroom trips.

Thanks
everyone for your help.
BJ

JanetH replied: I understand where you are coming from. I have a four year old and a three year old. My three year old is the one is the one who picks up everything. Any how I put soap in his mouth when he says things that I don't like and that is the only thing that worked. So I would definitely try that.

Hillbilly Housewife replied: I'd say it depends what type of soap...

skinkybaby replied: When I was little we had to brush our teeth with baking soda when we said something bad. Yuck. It still makes me cringe