What advice...

holley79 wrote: What is one thing you would tell a first time mother about that you had to learn the hard way?

HuskerMom replied: It doesn't matter whether you're changing a girl or boy, you can still get hit! I always thought it was just if you had a boy that you had to watch out for that. Summer got my MIL pretty good! She said after having 2 boys she never expected to get hit changing a girl but Summer proved her wrong!

maestra replied: When people come over to see you and the baby and ask if there is anything they can do around the house, Let them! With Jaci, I would let them hold her and go about doing my housework, and sometimes, that was what I needed. With my second, I learned to just suck it up and say "Yeah, would you mind doing the dishes?" Saved me a lot of time and let them feel like they were helping. (Especially with mother, mother-in-law)

moped replied: Oh so many things - i would need to think on this one!

msoulz replied: Lower your standards when it comes to the housework and appearances. It's too much to keep up the perfect home, care for a baby and still get enough rest. And that goes right along with "sleep when the baby sleeps".

punkeemunkee'smom replied: Hold them 'too much', Spoil them just a little, say I love you 1,000 time a day, Enjoy every moment! They all go by so fast. Write down every milestone because although you feel like you will remember that date forever there are so many things happening that you will forget!

my2monkeyboys replied:
I absolutely agree with this! Growing up happens way too fast!

mckayleesmom replied: Don't overdo it when you first get home.....relax...let the dishes and housework go if needed.

I made the mistake of trying to do everything when I first got home and it made me so sore....I think it actually made my healing take longer.

ZandersMama replied: your kid will not go to collage in diapers they will potty train!

Crystalina replied:
Good one!

Gosh, most of you have already said what I will say so I'll pull something else out....

Ok...

At the first sign of redness in the diaper area let the baby air out! If they pee they are washable. Air them out before you need a cream! It does work.

sparkys2boys replied: I think one of the most important thing is that if you think something is wrong with baby.. then something IS wrong. If you think they are sick don't put if off or let a doctor tell you that you are being over-bearing or to protective. A mother ALWAYS knows best no matter what. Trust yourself.

Celestrina replied:
The same thing goes for when people try telling you what to do (when you're not asking for advice). You know your kid best. You will learn to recognize their cries and what they mean. You know your kid's schedule. Don't be afraid to ask for advice, but don't be afraid to figure things out on your own.

holley79 replied: Awesome ladies!!!

There is NOTHING natural about breast feeding now matter what others and the book says. It's going to hurt, it's going to take time getting use to holding baby and feeding at the same time, let someone get you a glass of water, and if you and baby are not happy with breast feeding don't let someone make you feel bad about not wanting to.

(A friend of mine just called me crying because her MIL told her she was being selfish because she wanted to quit nursing. I told her she was Corbin's mama and they were her breast she didn't have to do squat any longer. She has been pumping because she could never get a good latch. She gave him 4 weeks of BM. )

blondemom replied: To sleep when they baby sleeps I tried to do to much after Dylan was born when I should of just slept when he slept I learned my lesson with Derrick I slept when he slept, I didn't worry about the house work I just slept!

holley79 replied:
I wish this bit of advice I would have followed. I tried to play Hostess when people came over and tried to make sure everything was in order. Dummy me, lesson learned.

blondemom replied: I did too Holley with your first baby everyone wants to come over and see you and the baby I kept the house spotless I should of just slept and not worried about the house

holley79 replied:
Isn't that the truth!!! I will hopefully remember this fruitful advice IF I ever decide Annika is going to get a sibling. She may be an only child by choice though.

lovemy2 replied: Definately sleep when the baby sleeps and lower your standards on your house, etc. but not on yourself.......

And I agree too Holley on the BF thing - I was so determined to BF with Dylan - it was a horrible experience for both of us - much do I think to him being very toungue tied - if someone had just told me or noticed it may have been different - I pumped for 6 weeks - it was not fun but he got the BM.....

MommyToAshley replied:
I agree. I second-guessed myself for rocking Ashley to sleep every night and getting up in the middle of the night and snuggling with her and rocking her back to sleep. Everyone said I was spoiling her and I should just put her in her bed and let her cry. But I can tell you now that even though I am much more rested these days, I miss those days of rocking her to sleep. I get some hugs and cuddles still, but she is so independent these days and doesn't have any problems going to be on her own. So, my advice is to go with your gut... what works for everyone else may not work for you. There is no perfect way to do things. So, relax and enjoy the moment because they go by so fast. The saying that it is just a phase is true, they won't go to college needing you to rock them to sleep and wearing diapers.

A&A'smommy replied:


Everyone has pretty much already said what I would say but here's one more

Don't be ashamed to ask for help, in any area breastfeeding, diaper changes, and remember daddy helped make baby he can help take care of baby even if you just need a nap.

holley79 replied:

AMEN SISTA!!!

redchief replied: I know I'm a dad, but one thing I noticed was this... There is, in every family, that aunt (or MIL or whoever) that thinks they have some God given talent for baby rearing... She will insist that since she did it this way with her child, that's how you should do it too ("it" can be almost anything). It took Lisa a while to get up the nerve to tell the busybody to back off. She didn't want to hurt feelings. Don't be afraid to get your DH to tell the person to back off if the busybody comes from his side of the family. In fact, have an agreement between you that this is how you're going to handle such problems. It's easier to do that when there isn't a near and present issue.

luvbug00 replied: there are a 4 ways to find out why a baby is crying,

1. check the bum ( wet diper is no fun)

2. burp them (tummy bubbles are uncomfortable)

3. check the time ( may be hungry time to eat!)

4. look arround ( someone or somthing may have startled them , hugs are in order)

chances are one of thease culprets caused the screamfest.

holley79 replied:
We had this arrangement. Thank goodness and it was a lifesaver.