Someone help me talk some sense into my Dad

MommyToAshley wrote: My Mom told me today that my Dad went on a 37mile bike ride today by himself! He did it in a little under 4 hours. DH and I usually ride bikes with him but things have been hectic lately. Not only did he go 37 miles, but he didn't drink enough water. He said he only drank two bottles of water the entire ride, and he ended up getting sun burned too. It was really hot and humid today. At least he had his cell phone with him. Anyways, I tried talking to my Dad about being careful... he's 65 but he thinks he's 20. But, he's stubborn... just ask DH, or anyone for that matter. I have never met a more stubborn man in my life. I don't know if he is trying to push himself since he had the cancer removed? I am sure that is a pretty traumatic experience and everyone deals with it differently. How do I get through to him that I love him and that he needs to be more careful because I don't want anything to happen to him?

Boys r us replied: Oh wow!!! I don't know what to tell you!! I have a dad with similar qualities...you know..the superman syndrome! I think at this point, all you can do is encourage him to drink more water..maybe help him come up with some inovative way to carry enough water with him and not have it be in his way while riding.

Hillbilly Housewife replied: Yikes. I`d just butt heads with him.

punkeemunkee'smom replied: I would say excatly what you said on here: You LOVE him and need him to stick around and so does Ashley! He may just be feeling good since the cancer is gone or he could be trying to prove to himself that he can still do the things he used to! Sounds like he is in gret health to ride like that! I probably would have needed EMS!!!

gr33n3y3z replied:
Just keep telling him

CantWait replied: I don't know what to say, but BAD DADDY!!! Please be careful!

coasterqueen replied: I agree just keep telling him. I do know many cancer survivors though that push themselves and try to live every second to the fullest being so thankful that they still have life left in them. I'm sure that's what he's doing. Some even go more into a denial state and do the same thing. He'll eventually 'figure' out his life/feelings towards what happened and calm down a bit.

NummyMommy replied: We have the same situation with DH's grandmother....shes in her late 60's and she goes rollerblading by herself.....she once broke her wrist from a fall and rollerbladed back home from a mile away. We all said "You need to have someone with you just in case" but she is ornery and is convinced that we are wrong and she is right. I think its hard for someone so independent for decades to ever depend on someone else. They are so used to doing for themselves they can't imagine why they need anyone now. She still doesnt think there is anything dangerous about it. I guess I have no advice cause the more we try to convince her the more she wants to prove us wrong....so no solution here (although we have thought of having her discreetly followed)

Kaitlin'smom replied: can you give him a nice gift basket with sunscreen and a bigger water bottle for his bike in it with a sweet card about how much he mean to you and your thinking of him and want to help take care of him?

if that wont fly just talk to him, or at least try.

kellibellisdillybear replied: I agree w/NummyMommy. If riding is important to him,but you don't have the time to go, he's going to go w/or w/out you. by him a camel pack for his water, urge him to use sunscreen, and let him go. None of us want to see our parents suffer, but just as we did when they took care of us, they aare going to do what they want. So, congratulate him on the distance, get some gatorade and aloe, and go help him heal. Never miss a chance to be with him or tell him you love him, and help him make the most of his life.

I lost my father two years ago, at the age of 57, he was diabetic and lived his life how he wanted. Had we realized that he would never change, maybe we would have found a better way instead of nagging him, he could have been happier, and we all could have spent more together time happy, not fighting. Now I have to cope w/the fact that he will never meet his grandson, nor any other children to come. But, if I embrace the fact that he did what he wanted, which was a lot, I feel a lot better. I'll always wish I had more time with him, but you already do, so enjoy it, and congratulations on having such an active Dad. We could all learn from him.

Kirstenmumof3 replied: I don't know what to say. I think you are right to be concerned about your dad and his health. Try sitting down with him and telling him about your fears. Good Luck!

kimberley replied: omg! i can understand why you are concerned, but in my experience.. you can't tell someone like that what they should or shouldn't do. is there not anyone who could ride with him? maybe make it out like it is just a fun thing instead of keeping an eye on him? good luck and i hope he is more careful!

A&A'smommy replied: OH dear I don't know what to tell you!! I hope he will listen to you and be careful at least so you don't worry!!

CantWait replied: ohhhhhhhhhh good ideas ladies The sunscreen, waterbottle and card for the next time. And some aloe, and a congrats for now.
You guys proved again just how smart you are.