She called my bluff----what to do - Related to M2A post on being influenced

Jamison'smama wrote: Jamison has a horrible fear of needles so she has never wanted her ears pierced. I know she has this fear so I have said to her whenever we have been in the mall--"okay, ready to get your ears pierced??"...knowing I will get an emphatic NO WAY--which I have heard for the last 6 months. I was clearly being sarcastic with her (yes, my parenting style is a bit unconventional). Now she made a new friend and things have changed. She will now wear 2 piece swimsuits (which she has refused for a year), since her new friend does and has now said "okay mommy, on Monday, I'm ready to pierce my ears". (her friend has hers pierced). I discussed with her the process etc. but she says she's ready....but I don't think I am.

Opinions on ear piercing welcome here. She will be 6 in September, and in the 1st grade.

What do I do????

A&A'smommy replied: yikes I dunno I want to get alyssa's ear peirced but she is like Jamison only alyssa's fear is that its going to hurt not the needles I got my ears pierced when I was 5 and it didn't hurt me at all and I LOVED it. Good luck

ediep replied:
i'd let her get them done..... at the mall, some places will do both ears at the same time, so she can't change her mind after one

Emma is 19 months and has hers done, looks adorable!!

MommyToAshley replied: Ashley wants to get them done for the same reason that her friends have pierced ears, but she won't because of the fear it will hurt. We watched a little girl get her ears done at the mall a few years ago, and the little girl screamed and cried when it happened, so I think it put a permanent fear in Ashley.

I'm glad though, I want her to wait until she is old enough to take care of them herself. I don't think she would be responsible enough at this age to do it herself, but I know I am in the minority. The majority of the girls she knows her age has them done.

MoonMama replied: I've had mine since I was 6 months old.

mom21kid2dogs replied: Olivia was always a "No way Jose' " girl when it came to piercing her ears, too. Last November she flipped on it totally. In one day, she wanted them pierced. I had no issue with it whatsoever because I like how they look. It wasn't anything I'd ever discussed with Stephen though (just because I was basically teasing her) and he wasn't as thrilled. He saw it more as a right of passage for older girls~and I agree this used to be the case. It just isn't anymore. There are loads of litttle girls with pierced ears.

Long story short, she got them done the day after Thanksgiving. She did both ears at once as Edie suggested so there was no turning back. She's never had a problem taking care of them. She's too chicken to change them so she's been wearing the same pair for 6 months but it's not infected, looks very healthy, she turns them all the time, etc.

I've also heard that it's best to pick a bigger size of stone in the first pair. I did read a horror story on another board about the earring being a little too small and it went through the front of the ear and got lodged in the ear lobe itself. The only other consideration might be summer sports. If she plays a sport where she wears a helmet~T Ball, bike riding, etc. it could get a little touchy getting a helmet on and off. If that's the case, I might try to put her off till late Fall or Winter so you don't have things close to her ears.

gr33n3y3z replied: I guess let her get those done but tell her she should only get those done bc she wants them done not because her friend has hers done.

luvbug00 replied: mya was 6 when she had hers done for the third and final time. She loves them and didn't cry at any of the 3 times it was done. As for earrings she is currently sporting pengin studs lol!

Maddie&EthansMom replied: Maddie is still afraid, even though her friends have theirs done. I think since Jamison says she is ready, that there's really no harm in it. You can always take them out if something happens.

I got mine pierced when I was 7. They were little gold balls. They grew thru the front of the ear and my dad had to pull them out of the back of the ear. But, the reason this happened was b/c I was allergic to them and they got infected. Just keep a close eye on hers, help her clean them and turn them and she should be fine.

I let mine grow up and then waited a few years to get them pierced again. Maddie will probably get hers pierced in a couple of years. I'm letting her decide. But, I also think there comes a time when they work up the courage and if it doesn't happen while they are courageous enough to do it, then that passes and they will never do it. I would be fine with it if Maddie decided today that she wanted it done...even if her friends encouraged her to do it. It's not a bad thing IMO. I wouldn't necessarily consider this peer pressure or bad influence.

Teesa®© replied: DD had asked to get hers done last year, so we did it for her Bday. She was turning 8. She was a big trouper getting them done - at the mall, and two grrls, each with a gun. We had only one minor problem with a bit of an infection, but it cleared right up. She's great with turning them.

DH was kewl with her getting them done, and how could I say "No", even if I wanted to? I have 12 piercings She wants to get a second set done, but I told her she had to wait for at least one year and it depends on if her ears are big enough then to support two sets.

DS wants his done now. I'm thinking maybe for his Bday next month - if he still wants it done. He'll be 7. What ear does he get done, left or right?? Does it matter anymore for boys???

grapfruit replied:
Pretty sure left is the correct ear....

luvmykids replied: Kylie got hers done at 5, Macie at 3...Kylie has done a great job of taking care of hers. Macie's were a little tough so I just took them out and we'll do it again when she can take care of them herself.

mckayleesmom replied: Mckaylee got hers done (at her request when she saw her cousins) at 2...She wanted "petties".....We took her and the lady pierced her and she told her she was "mean", but she didn't cry. She was great with them for about 5 months and then she kept taking them out and saying her ears itched...so after buying replacement earings 20 times I gave up and took them out of her ears and let them close.

This past Christmas we were at the mall with grandma doing some after xmas sale shopping and she wanted them done...So I took her in and she did it....They did one ear at a time...She was kind of hesitant on the second one although she still didn't cry....She just chanted "be brave, be brave" for the second one and it was fine. We did have a couple problems with the backs comming off the earings, but we finally found some that fit snugger.

Mckaylee did a great job taking care of her ears all by herself. She was very proud of these earings. She would wash her hair and before she got out of the bath she would put her cleaning solution on them and turn them really good. I would check the backs when she got out to make sure they weren't on too tight.

Today Mckaylee can clean her own ears and change her own earings.....Right now she has some purple turtle earings on.

stella6979 replied: Well, I'm one of those Moms who wants their child to be pure and holeless for as long as possible, so she will not be getting them done anytime soon. I know, I know....I'm such a mean Mama.

Kirstenmumof3 replied: I know it's a big decission whether or not to get our daughters ears pierced. Both Emily and Claudia had them done. Emily ended up being allergic to her earings, so we had to buy her gold earings. Other than that, everything was fine. Just make sure they will pierce both ears at the same time.

~Roo'sMama~ replied:
I'm the same way. I'll probably make Allie wait until she's at least ten. I used to say 13 though, so we'll see.

Mine were done when I was four, and I still remember the pain. Then I had problems for a few years with the right one always being infected, even though we cleaned them all the time.

mom21kid2dogs replied:
They told us when we got O's done if you follow the cleaning & turning regimine and they are still getting infected, it's likely a metal allergy. They recommended waiting at least a year or two before attempting it again. I thought that was good info to know, even though we didn't have this isuue with O's!

~Roo'sMama~ replied:
I did end up only being able to use the nickle free kind, because both my ears would get irritated by the regular kind. But it was just my right ear that was always so infected. I wonder if that was still the metal allergy or if it was something else?

mom21kid2dogs replied:
They said it could be a sensitivity in one or both ears but the underlying cause was an allergy. It was the one ear info that caught my attention because it sounded so unusual. I would have never guessed that!

Jamison'smama replied: well......

MommyToAshley replied: Aww... she looks beautiful! And, talk about looking grown-up!! WOW -- when did that happen????!!!!

MommyToAshley replied: Forgot to ask... how'd she do? Did she cry at all?

Jamison'smama replied: I need to get a better picture--in the sun so the earrings can be seen better but she did amazingly well. I took her to Libby Lu's. It was agreat experience, they did a certificate, wrote down how she felt before and after, sprinkled her with glitter dust. They were tricky which was good, they said 5 was the magic number---counted to 5 but pierced on 3 so she was not expecting it. She was surprised and I think she was close to tears but did very well. I cried though.

mom21kid2dogs replied: Awww . . . . too cute Hope they heal really well!!
I took O to Icing and they did the same trick with the counting. It made me jump because I wasn't expecting it
O told the girl who did the piercing that it didn't hurt but when we got to the car she told me (secretly, of course) that it hurt a little.

Maddie&EthansMom replied: Awww! I'm about to cry, Brenda! She's so gorgeous and SO grown up!!!

I'm glad you went to Libby Lu...all Maddie's friends had good experiences with them as well.

luvmykids replied: Aw, she is so pretty And she looks very happy about her new earrings

My2Beauties replied: Awwww she looks so gorgeous. Hanna is scared to do it too. I ask her everytime we go to the mall. She says she wants earrings but doesn't want to go through with the actual piercing process. I will wait until she is ready though. I won't force her. DH wanted me to get both the kids done as infants and I figured they'd be too hard to take care of since I'd be the one taking care of them and I want them to WANT their ears pierced not just do it because I think it looks cute on babies. It's a girl thing, I will never ever forget the first time I got my ears pierced I felt so grown up, I want my kids to have this same feeling.

jcc64 replied: Hey Brenda,
I must have missed this post the first time through. Too bad, b/c we just went through the piercing thing. I really had no opinion on the matter, I could have cared less if she got them now, when she was 12, or never. I know she wanted them b/c of all the reasons stated in this thread, but was afraid. A few months back, we were at the mall, having a girls' day- trying on makeup, buying clothes/shoes, the whole 9 yds. On a complete whim, I said, "Hey Corey, wanna get your ears pierced?" She said yes, we did it, end of story. A few tears AFTER it was done, but otherwise completely incidental. I promised her a new pair of earrings after school was done, and taking out the first pair, which had been in there a few months, was more traumatic than getting them done the first time. She's got tiny little sapphires, and I had a really hard time getting them out, probably b/c my fingernails are so short. And then when putting in the new pair, I was aiming the post slightly crooked, which hurt her and she freaked out. I never realized how hard it would be to put earrings in someone else's earlobes, particularly when they're so teeny.
In any event, Jama looks beautiful and very grown up. Glad it all worked out.