Sexual Offender..moving in!!!

jacobsmama wrote: Ok, You read it, I'm so not sure what to think. We live in very small "suburb" 10 miles away from town. Dh and his family have lived here for years. His father, aunt and an uncle live here. All togther it has about 14 houses and we all occupy about 4 of them. And then neighborhood friends. Well a house went up for sale and a contractor bought it and remoldeled it well now he is renting it out.


He told another neighbor the name and for some reason he looked the guy up (he is single) and he is a REGISTERED SEX OFFENDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have majorly mixed feelings about this and wanted you all's input. I mean Jacob is only 2 and half, It is hard to teach him certain things and we have alot of you kids in our family, they know not to talk to strangers but this is freaking me out!

I know at least he IS registered but I'm just nervous, upset and not sure what to think, we have lived here 5 years and never had to worry about this that we are aware of...

MyBabeMaddie replied: I don't know what to say other than I hope he doesn't give you any trouble - we had a registered sex offended in the neighborhood and I don't think we ever saw him leave the house maybe your neighbor will be a hermit too.. Good luck

cameragirl21 replied: wow
i don't really know what to tell you, i mean it's not good but what can you do? is there a way you can stop that guy from renting to the SO?

jacobsmama replied:
Well the man that found out he is registered sex offender is calling the owner tomm to see if he is aware so I hope he wasn't and changes his mind about renting because I'm just worried about everyone around here.

cameragirl21 replied: maybe you guys should tell the owner that you are concerned...you realize that any wrongdoing that goes on on his property is his liability, don't you? if the owner doesn't realize it, make sure he does.

C&K*s Mommie replied: We have a number of registered offenders living within a small vicinity of us, one of whom I grew up with, went to school and even worked with. I met his g/f at one time too not too long ago- at the time I did not know he was a sex offender. I can only speak for myself, but I am not overly concerned with the offenders living nearby. They mind their business, and I will mind mine. I am more concerned with people that I come in contact with face to face moreso than I am about an offender 5blocks away. I wonder what is going through people's minds. Since I do not know strangers that I see from Adam, I have no idea what is going through their minds when they see my girls. Personally, that puts me at more ill-ease than to know that there is an offender a few streets away, who may or may not pose a threat to me or my family. I hope that makes sense.

I do not think there is anything that you can do, other than to do the normal that is when it is appropiate you can begin to teach Jacob about things he should begin to be aware of with people (strangers or not) that he comes in contact with. He/She has every right to live there as you do. My thinking, and I may be in the minority with it, is this: it is always best to be on your guard with people that you know or do not know, whether thier history is known or not. If I am remembering correctly, registeries for sex offenders is a fairly new practice for many states (I think someone mentioned this once before on here... I think ) who knows how many others have not been registered and are living and working amongst you. KWIM?

C&K*s Mommie replied: I am not brilliant with laws and such, but would not that be discrimination to not rent to a potential tenant for that reason?

redchief replied: I think I'd take a look at his offender profile before I let the warning bells go off too loudly. Sex offenders are rated by their propensity to commit a similar offense again. The registry also lists what the offense was.

As far as potential liability for the homeowner goes, I'm not so sure about that. In many states when an owner leases a property it's nearly like transferring ownership of the property to the lessee for the term of the lease. In those states the owner has no liability other than as listed in the lease regarding property upkeep.

The best weapons we have against potential predators are knowledge, preparedness and communication with our kids. Remember, most predators haven't even been caught or identified by the law yet.

C&K*s Mommie replied: In short, that is what I was getting at in my novel length post.

MyBrownEyedBoy replied: Also, I have a friend who dated a girl through high school, he was two years older than she. They had sex when he was just barely 18 and right before her 16th birthday so she was 15. Her parents found out and he was charged with statutory rape. He has to be registered as a sex offender. So not all sex offenders are rapists and molesters.

CantWait replied:
Ditto.

I also think it's the ones that you don't know about that you have to worry about. The fact that he's registered means that if something were to happen, the police know where to look first, and you know where to keep your child away from.

mom2my2cuties replied: I have something add here - and considering my current situation - this is gonna shock some of you -

But you DO know that trying to prevent this man from living a NORMAL life is considered harrassment and YOU could very well be the one in jail for that?

jacobsmama replied: Wow...

Not the responses I was expecting to get. I'm not really looking for ways to prevent him from living a normal life or harrassing him. But the thought that someone could hurt or do wrong to your child is always in your mind right? But to have it broadcasted that he did hurt a child before (which I did find out why he got in trouble and do not want to go into detail about it) makes it harder to accept him in the neighborhood.


Just a little in shock, Thought I might get a little bit of support like "it will be ok" type of thing, felt more like a scolding...

Just different opinions.

mckayleesmom replied:
I don't think that is what people are saying....I think they are just reccomending that you prepare yourself before he moves in and do a little research on what he was convicted of before freaking out...kwim? At least that is the way I took it.

And like some of the others said....There really is nothing you can do. Unfortunantly, even sex offenders have rights , and you can get in trouble for harrassment if you try to stop him...It sucks, but that is just the way it is.

Knowledge is power......

CantWait replied:
I think people were just trying to educate especially since you didn't know the reason he was on the list, or hadn't shared the information. In all actuality it is unfortunate that there is nothing you can do. You know that he's there, so with a watchful eye though, you know that your child (ren) will be safe from him.

C&K*s Mommie replied: So sorry that it came off that way, there is no nice way to put it.

Brianne and Marie said it best regarding the shock/scolding that you may have felt.

MommyToAshley replied:
I completely agree with Ed.

I think I would feel the same way as you if a registered sex offender moved nearby. It's only natural to want to protect our children. However, I think that the registry is a good thing... it makes people more on guard and protective. The person moving in your neighborhood may be harmless, but the stranger walking down the street might not be. So, as Ed said education and communication are important whether there's a sex offender on your street or not. This may force the parents in your neighborhood to be a little more cautious, whereas the kids in the "safe" neighborhood may not have the same benefit.

jacobsmama replied: Thanks!