Rules for eating?

C&K*s Mommie wrote: Do you encourage your child(ren) to eat all of their food or do you encourage your child(ren) to try a little of everything without having to eat it all?

Were you raised the same way?

TheOaf66 replied: we allow tanner to eat the amount of food that he wants there is no "clean your plate" mentality. We do encourage him and sometimes force him to try food he has not had before because a lot of times he says no just because it is new and many times he likes what we make him eat. But he knows when he is hungry and full so he eats as much as he wants. Sometimes he rushes through because there is something else he wants to do but I am not worried about the amount he eats.

mom2my2cuties replied: With the kids, I make them eat at least 4 bites of everything on thier plates. I believe you have to eat more than one or two bites to really "try" something.

I was raised with the notion that "If you don't eat it know you will be served said meal until you do eat it" and "You will eat it if you get hungry enough".

I have always believed that just as I have food I don't like, my children will have thier own likes/dislikes and it's not really fair of me to force them to eat something they really don't like, especially if they had adequately tried it.

stella6979 replied: Growing up, we had to eat EVERYTHING on our plates which I hated. I don't see anything wrong with having your kids try everything, but sometimes you just don't like something. I plan to NEVER make my kids eat something if they truly don't like it.

Boo&BugsMom replied:
Hummm...it depends. We don't make Tanner clean his plate, but we make sure he eats a certain amount of it. He doesn't get a treat/dessert if he doesn't eat all of his food on his plate. We don't have dessert often, but for example, he'll get chocolate in his Christmas stocking and we'll let him have something from there if he asks and after he eats all his food. If it's a food he hasn't tried before, then he must try it. If we are having a food we know he really doesn't like, then we wont make him eat it, but he has to eat the stuff we know he likes.

ETA: my parents were the same way, but they were much more strict and stubborn about it.............and so was I.

Interesting how my hubby explained it. We do have him eat a certain amount, but it's generally smaller portions.

grapfruit replied:
I only had to eat everything if it was the wicked witch of the west making it. There were many times I sat there for a LONG time.

I don't eat meatloaf to this day Not b/c I don't like it, but b/c I think of HER everytime I THINK of meatloaf. (Note: I didn't like her dry crusty meatloaf smoothered in ketchup)

Also I remember my mom MAKING me drink all my milk before I could come downstairs and watch soaps w/her. I had to be like 5 or 6. I HATE milk, so I would carefully and quietly pull the chair to the sink and very very carefully dump it down the drain, right down the middle so I didn't have to turn on the water. (All this after I gave myself a milk mustach so she thought I drank it ). She didn't realize I did this until I told her a few years ago.

There's a LOT of things I don't like so I wouldn't make my kids eat things they didn't like, they'd have to TRY it though!

C&K*s Mommie replied: We do not make the girls eat all of their food, they have to eat some of it at least. Else they will not get a dessert of fruit then ice cream (if we are at a restaraunt). Healthy foods they have to eat most of. Fried foods they can eat a bite or leave it alone, we do not encourage that as much.

Those words ring true for me. That is how I have come to like certain things (mashed potatoes for instance) is because I was hungry enough one day when I was younger and ate some and still eat it as an adult. I am not a huge fan of it, but I will eat some of it.

I was raised to eat all of my food, but there were times when I could get away with pushing it around the plate to make it look as though I ate it. My parents knew what I did, and even made it known to me that they knew what I was doing but I was able to throw the rest of the food away even still.

Kaitlin'smom replied: grwoing up it was clean your plate, with Kaitlin I give her small portions and if she wants more she can have more. I usually have a variety of things and if she has not tried something I aske her to at least try it, she is good about tring it. If she likes it she can have more if not no big deal. I have also found that while she might not like it the first time she might the second or third time. She has been supprised many times when she find out she likes something new. Now if I coudl just get DH to try more things, he is better but still need to watch what he says and does.

Boo&BugsMom replied: I was not so smart and tried hiding the food under my plate. Then when they would excuse me I would bolt to my bedroom before they lifted my plate up. After that didn't work, I started feeding our dog. Those beagles are great eaters!!!

redchief replied: We never forced our children to clean their plates. I think eating disorders can, at least partially, be born in that. We always encouraged our kids to try everything, even things they've tried in the past and did not like... tastes change and sometimes they're surprised.

One thing on the clean your plate thing, especially as they've gotten older. While we don't force them to eat everything on the plate, if they repeatedly take more than they will eat and throw good food away, I'll suggest they not take so much, knowing that if they want more they are welcome to it.

MommyToAshley replied: I don't force Ashley to eat everything on her plate. But, I let it be known that if she doesn't eat the healthy things then she doesn't get dessert or a treat. She doesn't have to eat all of it, but I do have her eat a certain amount of the vegetables and fruit every day. Usually it's not a problem because she likes both.

MyBrownEyedBoy replied: Heck, if Logan eats anything at all, I count myself LUCKY. I didn't grow up with parents that made me clean my plate and if I didn't like something, I was allowed to ask for a "No thank you" helping, which was about 1 or 2 bites. I'll probably follow similar rules with Logan.

My3LilMonkeys replied: I grew up with a clean your plate rule, and you always got a normal sized serving. The rule was you didn't leave the table until you ate your dinner - on nights when we didn't like the food, we could be there for hours.

Really my only rules are to taste things before you say you don't like them, and you must eat at least part of your dinner or no snack/dessert. I'm very tough on the trying things rule though.

DillsMommy replied: I was never forced to clean my plate and I never make Dylan clean his. I know about how much he has to eat to be full, so if it looks like eat didn't eat enough I'll tell him "take 3 more bites and you can be done" He's usually a good eater though anyways.

Hillbilly Housewife replied: Well I believe that many eating disorders can be brought on by bad eating habits. And just as you shouldn't wake a sleeping baby for a feeding, the baby will wake up when hungry, you shouldn't forcefeed a child more than they can/want to eat.

I don't give my kids big portions... I only give them about the amount of food they can hold in their hands....which is the recommended meal size, anyways. If they want more, they can have more, of course... but they know that they have to at least eat what's on their plate if they want a second helping of something.... like if we have mashed potatoes, mushrooms, and chicken, and they eat the chicken and potatoes but not the mushrooms, and they request more chicken or potatoes, the answer is yes, since obviously they are still hungry, but only after they finish the mushrooms. Then it's their choice if they forego more food. If they're no longer hungry, I won't force them to eat the mushrooms... but they're not getting anything else from that meal. They don't usually get a snack anymore before bed, so they're not going to get one now, either.


Emilie's pretty picky... but she'll eat what I give her anyways, because as stubborn as she is, I'm worse... and will re-heat and re-heat and re-heat her meal for a whole evening.

3xsthefun replied: Rob and I kinda of use to butt heads on this. But it has gotten better. He grew up with the rule to eat everything on your plate, if you said you didn't like it you got even more of it. I didn't grow with either of those rules.

We usually let the girls eat until they get full, but sometimes will ask them take at least one more bite. That is if we think they had not eaten enough, but if they don't want to then we usually do not make them.

luvmykids replied:
Same here.

mckayleesmom replied: I don't have a clean your plate rule...per say... Like I said before, Im very lucky that my kids are not picky eaters....My problem is them not bouncing off the walls long enough to eat....I usually put it on the table and they have until they go to bed to eat it....Then its off to bed...They usually eat it all. Russell I have to sometimes feed because he is stubborn.....I don't force feed him...He just likes it when I feed him...If I don't feed him his food...he trys to eat off my plate.

lesliesmom replied: I grew up in a clean your plate household. I remember sitting at the table MANY times until 7 or so because I wouldn't eat my peas. With our kids, we use kid-sized plates and give them small portions. They don't have to eat everything on their plates but if they want seconds of something (say their veggies - which is usually what they want more of) they have to finish their startch (stuffing, potato, rice, couscous) and their meat. If they are still hungry then they can have more. DH was VERY overweight when we had DD#1 and has lost 100+ lbs. We are trying to teach the kids good (at least decent) eating habits and not to keep eating if they are full, but they do have to have at least 4 bites of everything on their plate.

boyohboyohboy replied: we do make the kids sit at the table until everyone is finished, unless its a social occasion and there are many adults talking...but we do not make them clean their plates, we do however make them try what is there.
my parents always made us eat what was on our plate no matter how long it took.

Our Lil' Family replied: My mom quickly learned that even "just one more bite" when I was full would make me throw it all up....so I was never forced to eat more than I needed. Thomas is still young but I don't force him to eat, he'll eat when he's hungry. But like this morning, he would not eat breakfast so I let him down and gave him an extra cup of milk, I hope that's not sending the wrong message but he needs the vitamins!

mom2my2cuties replied: I really think that all kids do know when they are hungry. But I also know sometimes it's easy when they eat out a lot or something to get accustomed to that. I have had a really hard time breaking Andrea (and myself) from that mentality since being back from Spokane. And when they get used to something, or have only 2-3 foods they are eating, then it's hard to get them to eat more than that.

Hillbilly Housewife replied: Another thing to keep in mind is a scary proportion of people often mistake thirst for hnger... they eat when they really should be drinking. Probably from being forced to eat when not hungry as children... and likely to be one of the causes so many people are fat.

CantWait replied: We encourage to at least try a little bit of everything. It's evident when they REALLY don't like it. They tend to either gag, or hold it in their mouth.

When I was growing up, we had to sit there and eat it till it was gone.