Old women irritate me!!!!!! - venting

Jackie012007 wrote: I have been kind of down in the dumps lately, so DF decided to take me to this REALLY NICE place to eat... I had never been there and it's pretty far away so the car ride was fun and then going someplace I had never been made it even better! We went to dinner a little early, and the place was filled with older/elderly people... you know, who all eat at like 4 We ordered our food (mmmmm seafood alfredo) and then went up to the big soup and salad bar they have... it's awesome, it's HUGE and has lots of goodies all over...

anyways! So we have to walk through the restaurant to get to the bar, and I feel all these eyes on me... looking around, every old lady in the restaurant is giving me looks. Perhaps this is because I'm almost 12 weeks and already slightly heavy, and because I'm so short waisted, I'm pretty round!

So I'm like whatever... I get back to the booth, and DF goes to the bathroom. I go to take a bite when I hear some old biddy sitting next to me say "How disgusting! Knocked up at 17!!"

uhhh... yeah I'm 22. And I don't really like the term "knocked up"... so that really upset me! No, we aren't married, but we have been engaged for 2 years and apparently the huge rock on my left hand wasn't enough to keep them from making nasty comments just loud enough for me to hear!

So my nice dinner was ruined... I ended up leaving before I said something, as I'm not one to keep my mouth shut when people are insulting me. DF was so upset, all he wanted to do was cheer me up. I hate nasty old women!!!!!!

ZandersMama replied: Dont you love how the elderly think they have a right to comment. I was married for awhile when I got preggo. I had a cute tshirt that said BABY across the front of it and an old woman stopped me and told me that in HER day they didnt advertise when they got in trouble. I said times have changed LOL snotty old women anyway. Dont let them get to you.

kimberley replied: rudeness at any age is uncalled for. i am sorry that happened to you.

TheOaf66 replied: well I have nothing against elderly people but I agree that no matter what age, comments like that should be kept in your head. There is no reason to say things like that and I would have said something and I know my DW would have as well

Boo&BugsMom replied: Jackie, that is very rude of them to treat you like that! People like to assume things, especially when they don't have anything better to do. Some people also like to place their judgements out there and let it be known. I'm sure if we opened up their closets, their skeltons would come out just like anyone else. I can't stand it when people act all high and mighty like that. And Oaf is right, I would have opened my mouth. I'm not very shy about letting my feelings me known when people tick me off.

TheOaf66 replied:
especially when she was pregnant

Jackie012007 replied: darn my parents for teaching me to respect my elders!!!! I felt bad saying something in response, isn't that horrible????

TheOaf66 replied: no, respect is a 2-way street, I am not suggesting you should have called her an old bag or anything but she was out of line and you would have been in the right to call her on it elder or not.

Jackie012007 replied: yeah... but ooooh I wanted to call her an old bag SO BAD

Boo&BugsMom replied:
You probably shouldn't follow in my footsteps. I tried to teach the hubby to open his mouth at his last job, and it only got him in trouble.

Jackie012007 replied: I've never been one to be walked all over, but MAN I am so bad about my mouth since I got pregnant!!! I've gotten a lot of %$#@ from people for being unmarried, maybe that is what is making me like this... but omg it is so bad, even driving I'm like yelling WAY TO PULL OUT THERE %$#@$%#$$ (in the comfort of my own car, lol) and I was never like that!!

TheOaf66 replied:
that is true and it was bad cuz I loved that job

redchief replied: I think some biting sarcasm would have been best played there.... Something like this:

Old bag says, "How disgusting! Knocked up at 17!!"

You say, "I couldn't help but overhear, maam. At what age were you first knocked up?"

She stammers... sputters, maybe she even answers that she was 20!

You say, "I really must thank you though for mistaking my age at 17. I'm 22 and quite able to handle being pregnant, motherhood and the trials of family. By the way, speaking of disgusting, you have guacamole on the end of that wart on your nose. Have a good day!" Evil grin, walk away.

C&K*s Mommie replied: I have nothing against older women either. But as you said, maybe it was the combination of feeling protective (not sure if that is the right word) over being unmarried, and PG. There is nothing to be ashamed of, whatsoever. I only say this because as the female in an interracial relationship I was always self-conscious (sp) about being in public and I felt very small. Couple that with our children, plus several other things that have always plagued my mind while out in public. I would become defensive and agitated at the slightest thing. Not anymore so much, but I did. Nowadays, if I notice someone is looking cross my way, I go about my business, and not take another second to care for their inconsideration.

That is not to say that you were in the wrong for feeling how you did, you were right in feeling angry. That was plain rude and uncalled for by her.

Sorry your dinner was ruined by inconsiderate people, maybe you can go back again soon with your head held high as the proud momma-to-be that you are, and enjoy your meal this time. Inconsiderate people!

Hillbilly Housewife replied:
You made my day Ed..you made my day. I was just thinking of pretty much that type of response... I went to the parc with my kids and this woman was all like...

her: wow..they're all YOURS?

me: Yes. (i wanted to say - no, this one i found and these two i kidnapped)

her: And you're only 24?

me: Yes.

her: wow, that's pretty young to have 3 kids

me: Yes, I know (i wanted to say - by 24, in YOUR day, if you weren't married with a few kids you weren't going to get married and have kids)

C&K*s Mommie replied: I should not laugh, but that is the truth!

redchief replied:
It is sinful that our so called advanced society can't get beyond such primitive, racist attitudes.

redchief replied:
I think Lisa often got embarrassed by my public sarcasm when people uttered off-hand remarks. She's more of an "in your face" responder. She's gotten used to me though.

Jackie012007 replied: OMG your comment early killed me... darn I wish I was one of those quick thinkers, I'm the one that imagines like 3 hours later what I should/would have done and it's all witty and perfectly timed!

luvmykids replied: When I was pg with the twins I had to quit wearing my wedding ring, people always made "unwed mother" comments It's so rude to assume and even worse to say it OUT LOUD

MyLuvBugs replied:


Sarcasim is ALWAYS my come back when people say crap like that. Unfortunately, when I'm PG...the brain isnt' as quick as it normally is. So, it would have probably taken me a bit to get over the hurt feelings. Just like you, my parents taught me to respect my elders....however, they also taught me Independence (which they regret ) and how to defend myself and my loved ones by using my brain, and my mouth has gotten me in tons of trouble b/c of it .

Obviously no one ever taught that lady how to have tact or respect for others, so in my book she didn't deserve to have respect from you (no matter what her age). But it's too late now, so try to just let it roll off your back. You still have a wonderful DF and a beautiful baby on the way. That's all that matters.

PrairieMom replied:
When I was prego with The Boy and to swollen for rings I had a guy ask me if I was pregnant. (Um yeah, I'm VERY noticable like 8 months along) Then he asks "are you married? " My response? "No. Why? are you looking?" jerk. Don't people know that baby's don't come from weddings?

Jackie012007 replied: ohhh I love you guys... made me feel so much better and I love all the witty comebacks!