OK for those who have kids in day care... - what would you do... SOO MAD

MyBabeMaddie wrote: First off let me start by saying



Okay.. this could be long

On Friday, I picked Madison up from day care as usual except that when I put her in the car I noticed she was having trouble swallowing and whenever she tried she would cough as if she were choking, I did a quick check to see if anything was in her mouth, and by just peeking in it was clear. I shrugged it off because she is getting her bottom 2 and top 2 teeth right now so I figured it might just be a lot of drool.... So...... We get home and I immediately sit down to give her a bottle and she couldn't swallow... The formula was just leaking out of her mouth and she was coughing like crazy. So I open her mouth again and noticed the roof of her mouth was black. My first thoughts were "OH MY GOD SHE SWALLOWED A PEN AND HAS BLACK INK IN HER MOUTH" but when I went to touch it, it was a warning label from a toy from daycare - How ironic that the label, WHICH WAS FREAKING CHOKING HER said: "Disgard before giving to child, May be a possible CHOKING HAZZARD!" It was about 2-3 inches long and about 1.5inches wide... It was one of those plastic-type things that you can stick to other plastics or windows that kind of material. I was soo shocked I didn't know what to do I was going to call the daycare right then and WHO THE **** knows why I didn't. SO today I go and drop Maddie off and the women (normally I REALLY like her shes always friendly but recently has been a bit of a jerk) was like hanging over the side of one of the cribs just kind of resting there while the 3 other babies were crying. I take out one bottle for the lady to put in the fridge and she says with this attitude "Why did you only bring her oooonnnnnneeeee bottle?" She knows that Madison is only there on Wednesdays for a max of 2 hours and plus she had just finished a bottle 20 minutes ago, Please you think I don't know my own child? Anyways I set maddie down on the play mat and go to kiss her goodbye, and of course she starts crying because thats what she does when she knows I'm leaving, and the lady goes to pick Maddie up while I"m walking out she says in her snippy little attitude voice "WHY DONT YOU JUST JOIN THE CLUB MADISON EVERYONE ELSE IS CRYING" I had it with that place, I went in after school today and talked to the director of the daycare and told her what was going on and she was just like I'm so sorry my teachers know better than to act like that... And i'm like BUT WHAT ABOUT THE FREAKING PLASTIC STUCK IN HER THROAT? She acted as though I made it up and told me I had to bring the piece of plastic in, but dummy me I think I threw it away.

Thank you for letting me get that out, WHEW!

What would you do?

Edited for a type

my2monkeyboys replied: What would I do? I'd want to choke somebody! I'd search for that plastic tag, first off, and make sure I take it to her if you find it. I'd make sure she knew how serious the situation is, for sure!
I hate that the lady that keeps her was being such a hiney-hole, but maybe she's having a really bad time... you never know what may be going on in her personal life, ya know?

MyBabeMaddie replied:
Yeah, she was on vacation last week so I'm sure shes a little depressed that shes back in Sh*tsburgh - She could have at least waited until I left the room to say that though.

my2monkeyboys replied: Oh yeah, no doubt that would have probably ticked me off, too. I just meant that maybe since she's been acting odd lately that maybe there's something serious going on personally. Not that she should take it out on you, the other parents and (certainly not) the babies though!

MyBrownEyedBoy replied: Personally, I'd pull Logan out faster than a New York minute and file a complaint with the day care provider's regulation agency. All certified daycares have to inspected regularly and you can file a complaint just like you can with the better business bureau.

Jackie012007 replied: Sarah I work in a daycare and I would report her *** to the state!! I dunno how strist PA is about certifying daycare providers but NY is a bunch of Nazis... something like that would close a daycare for sure!!! When any new toys are brought into the place, wether by children or us, any tag HAS to be cut (per NY rules) before it can be given to a child.

Secondly she should NOT have blown off your concern - by procedure (here, anyway) parental concerns are supposed to be handled immediately and also documented!! And as far as her just sitting there while babies are crying, etc... that is so not cool. I would find another daycare at the very least!

BAC'sMom replied: Yes I would be PO'd and I would have gave her an earfull.
Then I would not take my child back.

HuskerMom replied: I think I'd be finding another daycare. If she's saying stuff like that while you're there then who knows what she says while you're gone. And where was she when Madison almost swallowed the warning label? Even if something was going on in her personal life that doesn't give her an excuse to act like that.

Twelve Volt Man replied: Why in the heck does she need to see the plastic that Madison was choking on? If you were going to make up a story like that, you could easily produce something, and "claim" she had choked on it. It sounds to me like she's disregarding your concern (which is legitimate, in my opinion). You pay good money for day care, and deserve to get good service in return. I'd seriously consider changing day cares, and let the current one (and everyone else you talk to) know the reason why.

jcc64 replied: Hon, I would look for another place to leave your baby. The writing's on the wall- get out before something more serious happens.

Mommy2Isabella replied: I WOULD FREAK. First off Isabella and I stay home and play together so this has NEVER been my experience HOWEVER, I do day care for other moms who need help and want IN HOME care for this very reason.

I am so sorry you have to deal with this. Too bad you don't live in Charleston, I would hook you up!

lovemy2 replied: Honestly and I am not a major alarmist and have learned that you have to roll with some punches with daycare and realize it isn't you taking care of your child BUT I would take her out right away and report the incident.........that is a major safety issue......

Crystalina replied: Oh wow! I would have been kicked out (with my child) because I would have been all over that woman!

I know it's easy for all of us to say what shoulda, woulda been done had it been us and I know it's harder for you when there is a job waiting for you. I would just start looking for something else quickly and I would be sure that place cringed whenever my name was mentioned because I would not take my child out quietly.

Crystalina replied: And if she's saying stuff like that while your there I could only imagine what she says when no parents are not around.

And the whole thing about her choking on the plastic..

Calimama replied: I'd find a new day care and file a complaint. That is scary.

mummy2girls replied: PULL HER OUT!

jenna was neglected at thsi one daycare and she was not getting fed and was being ignored. She was 8 months old. The workers were very snippy towards me and mean towards Jenna. I yanked her out faster that they could blinka nd when i went to grab her i made sure there was parents near us when i told them why iw as yanking her without notice!!!!!! and then i made a complaint to social sevices about the centre!

hawkshoe replied:
My feelings exactly.

boyohboyohboy replied: I know how hard it is to start over and find a new daycare with people that you trust and that is affordable, but honestly in this case, I think you have no choice. I would be concerned about a woman who spoke to my dgt that way in front of me, what does she do when she is over whelmed with all those babies crying? Does she just throw a bottle at them? Is that why she wanted you to bring extra bottles?
and why was the manager not totally upset with her employee for speaking to you that way. What happened to the customer is always right. I would get the name of the district mananger, and the regional manager, they have to give it to you, and it should be posted in the lobby, and write your concerns down, then call them! I did this before, and believe me that will straighten them out, and if I were you I would still pull her out. Thank god maddie wasnt able to swallow that plastic tag and it was stuck in her throat where you couldnt see it, not just the top of her mouth,.
good luck.

gr33n3y3z replied: I agree with Kelly

And I would dig through that trash for that plastic thing too and take a pic of it

lisar replied: I say pull her out of there NOW!!!! Thats just crazy. I made my sister pull her DS out of a daycare after I went up there and they didnt give him snack. All the other kids were eating snacks and he wasnt and I asked him why and he told me they told him no. I asked them why and they said cause he was being bad. OH WELL You still dont deny a child thier afternoon snack. So for that I would be so GONE...And I think you kept your cool alot better than I could have.

MyBabeMaddie replied: You know looking back I should have pulled her a long time ago. I remember one day my afternoon class was cancelled so they were a bit surprised when I picked her up 3 hours early... I walked in and Madison was sitting in a bouncy seat (almost completely hanging over the side) and there were other babies there sharing HER bottle, the lady was a bit disgruntled when I walked over and grabbed her out of that seat. I put away our bouncy seat as soon as she could sit up by herself beacuse the label on it said that infants who can sit up by themselves should not be put in the seat anymore... So I told her please don't put her in that seat and wouldn't you know it the next week I came in and she was sitting in that seat while the bigger babies were after her bottle again. My poor baby

lesliesmom replied: I would DEFINITELY start looking ASAP and pull her without notice. Like Shelly said, when you do, make sure there are other parents around so they know why you are pulling her out. File a complaint as well. Hopefully you can get her in a new center quickly but this needs to be reported and investigated. Admittedly, at the daycare my kids are at, I have seen them, especially the little ones, go over and pick up a bottle or sippy that fell on the floor and help themselves to it; however, our DCP will take it away as soon as she notices or the kids in the daycare "self-patrol" each other and will either try and correct the situation themselves or let the DCP know. Good luck to you and KUP.

Kaitlin'smom replied: OMG get her out NOW. I would not leave her there a minute longer. This is the biggest reason I with with in home care, and was very picky about pre-school. I woudl also make my complaint know LOUDLY.

sparkys2boys replied:
Exactly.. get out now.

TheOaf66 replied: get your kid out of there, report the daycare, and find another place. Obviously it is a shabby place and you don't need that.

PrairieMom replied: They sound very irresponsible, and un professional, and I would yank my kid out of there so fast it would make their heads spin. Then I would report then to who ever regulates them. Oh my goodness. she totally could have choked on that plastic, and with that level of indifference, (3 baby's crying and leaning against a crib listening to it) would they even notice if she choked?

DO you have another child care option?

MyBabeMaddie replied: Well since Adam got laid off he's around but he is probably going back to work in a week or so... I put her on the waiting list in January for this place which IS AMAZING I called yesterday and there's still one more baby in front of us

jcc64 replied: Keep calling- and looking around. Listen, I know how hard it is to make a big change like this- and it's easy for all of us to tell you to get out. I had a woman who used to come to my home to watch my dd (and I worked from home- so I was always completely aware of how my baby was being treated at all times- a luxury, to be sure). While the care she gave my dd was very good, she was borderline abusive to me, IN MY OWN HOUSE. She was an older woman- my mother's age, and she just had some definite ideas about the way things should be done. I put up with it for far longer than I should have, because, well, I was afraid I wouldn't be able to find anything better. I was miserable, completely, utterly miserable- it was like an abusive relationship. Anyway, we wound up having a huge explosive screaming match on my front lawn, and we parted ways that day. In my heart for a long time, I knew it was a bad situation, but I was kind of paralyzed. Make the move, you know in your heart it's the right thing to do- you won't regret it. Good luck, and kup.

mummy2girls replied: yes it can be hard.. it was hard for me to yank jenna out that day because i am a single mom so it was really hard to get a day off... as i was a nanny. but i would rather lose my job than have my daughter be tretaed that bad. Have the dad take care of her for those days he is still nto workinga nd take the next coupel weeks and find a new place top put her ion. I wish i lived near you as i would taker her in a heart beat! I need more girls in my dfayhome as i have nothing but 2 girls and 4 boys:)

sorry about the spelling errors...LOL

punkeemunkee'smom replied: GO PICK HER UP NOW and NEVER GO BACK!!!! It sounds like something horrible is going to happen there...OMG you are so blessed that the label stuck on the roof of her mouth and did not block her throat completely! I would file complaints with the state and put everything in writing for the daycare manager. That is just scary!

my2monkeyboys replied: Oh, I'm so glad to hear all of you so willing to say "pull her out"! I thought that too, but was afraid that since I'm a SAHM that it would be looked at as though I were saying, "see, you should stay home with your child, too," which I do not at all think. (I always fell like people think that's how I believe, when it's really isn't.)
So now I'll say what I really think -- go to the daycare, let them have it about everything you and Maddie have been dealing with and then take her elsewhere. File a complaint with any and every place you can, too.
Also, I'd ask around with other people you know that have children... ask who keeps them, if they are happy with them, etc. Even if they tell you that the person isn't accepting anymore children, I'd call anyways and make sure. And, for what it's worth, if you can find a day home provider, I think that'd be the better choice most times. It seems that the parents I know who have day home providers are much more satisfied than those with daycare.
I hope it works out for you and Maddie quickly!

amymom replied: I know how hard it is to pull you child when you are worried about something happening. I know you are still in school, but you can make something work. If you want more details about what I went through feel free to ask, but I was in a similar situation and am glad I pulled my son from the home day care situation when I did. We all wish you well. KUP on how things go. We can give you lots of moral support.

Boo&BugsMom replied: What would I do? Find a new daycare. Not because of the choking incident, because accidents do happen when you are taking care of that many children as sad as it is to say, but because the teachers and director all acted like it wasn't a big deal. If that were my center, I would be apologizing up and down to the parent, adding it to my notes for the next staff meeting, and having a talk with the teachers about choking hazzards! It certainly would be made out to be a BIG deal!!! Because it is! A good center will listen to your concerns no matter how big and small and do something about it when something can be done. The way the director handled it seems plain lazy.