Not to start a debate - circumcision

kit_kats_mom wrote: I know that this is a hot debate topic on other boards and I certianly don't want to start one here. However, I have to post this because it effected me so deeply today. I still don't know if I'm having a boy or girl but if it's a boy, I made one decision today that I will not change.

I was at my OB's office waiting to be seen. My OB performs circumsicions in his office. They had taken me to the "second" waiting area which is near all of the exam rooms. Two little boys were brought in to have circumcisions while I was waiting. The parents waited in the lobby and the dr's performed the surgery. It was fast. All you heard was a bit of crying as they were prepped, a loud click, then the most ungodly wailing, screaming and crying that I've ever heard. Both babies kept crying for at least 20 minutes and when they had calmed down, the parents were brought in and told how well they did. It just broke my heart to hear these babies crying over something that obviously hurt terribly. The fact that their mothers werent' there with them also made me nauseous. All I could think was, that poor baby needs to be held, nursed and comforted.

I vowed that I will never do that to my little boy...if that's what it is.

I hope I didn't offend anyone. It just really effected me more than I thought it would and my decision is to not have it done. I was actually really pleased that K was a girl so that the decision was made for me. LOL.

amynicole21 replied: Ugh - that is awful. I wonder why the parents weren't there with them? I guess the docs know that it would be awful for them to see their boys in so much pain Horrible. I agree with you - glad Sophia was a girl

Kirstenmumof3 replied: I had Spencer circumsized when he was 1 day old and if Claudia had been a boy we would have done it again. He didn't cry at all, they put a little freezing in and when they brought him to me he was asleep. I did this because my husband and brother where circumsized. I also had Spencer circumsized because when my sister had my nephew she was 17 and the nurses made her feel so bad about the circumsision that she didn't have it done. When my nephew was 4 years old he developed an infection and had to be cicumsized. They had to put him to sleep, the nurses kept asking why she didn't do this when he was a baby, it would have been less tramatic they said. I remember him waking up after the procedure screaming and he wouldn't go to the bathroom. He said it really hurt. The doctor who did it also screwed it up and when he is an adult he may need to go and have it corrected. I agree that this is a decission that everyone has to make for themselves. I hope that this doesn't turn into a big debate. No one is right or wrong here.

Littlejojames replied: Oh My God! Thats sounds far to painful.

My friends Ex is Jewish and he had it done when he was young and he says it the best thing every on Hygiene perpose but i could never do it to my child.

jem0622 replied: Both of my boys are circumcised. They can medicate them and if the doctor's didn't then that is just wrong. Circumcision is a very personal and private decision. I respect everyone's choices on the matter for that reason.

KatieLeigh79 replied: It is a real personal choice for any family - I was against it, but my husband wouldn't stand for it not being done, in the end we had it done with JR just after he was born, in fact the Dr that did it had him all taken care of and back asleep before she even brought him back into me, they put numbing stuff on him and I guess aside from the bright light waking him up he slept through it and was back in my arms 9 minutes later... in the end I think I'm glad we had it done though prostate cancer and what not runs high in the families and I've read that it can also give you a better chance of something like that as well as SDT's later in life if you don't take care of yourself properly..

Granted, if we had another boy I can't honestly say I'd want to do it again, I still in my heart believe the little guy should be left natural but it would probably be done again, 1 because i know with how my OB is they try the best they can to keep the baby comfortable throughout, and 2 because of family history I wouldn't want to increase his chances of getting something in the end that could have been somewhat prevented,,,

Granted this is just my .2 so no one get upset with me, just felt like speaking my mind.

kit_kats_mom replied:
maybe that's it. Perhaps it was the fact that the parents weren't there to comfort the baby that really bothered me. I'm all about not letting my babies cry for any reason if it can be avoided...at least until they turn into devilish toddlers LOL.

I'm sure the doc's use local anestetic but it sounds like some of you had better experiences.

I totally respect everyone's decisions to do it or not. Especially for religious reasons.I know that many dads feel strongly about the boys "looking like them" and if a heath issue runs in the family that may be effected by it..go for it. I know that cleaning is a big issue too and I know that there can be some health issues. I guess I need to do more research on it just in case but my heart tells me not to do it.

I was just really effected by it yesterday. I know that yall are a great bunch of ladies and I could get it off of my chest without causing a big stir.

Thanks for your input and keeping it civil.

DansMom replied: Thanks for this story---I think everyone's experience is different, but I'm glad we decided not to circumsize Daniel.

CMD3989 replied: Omg, that is horrible. My boyfriend wants our boys to be uncircumsized. I don't really care either way so that is fine with me.

Kaitlin'smom replied: I agree its a personal decision, and its your choise to make. Me I would never do it and my husband knows not to step on that decision, thankfully I had a girl so we did not have to argure about that. I just dont agree with it, but I wont slam anyone who does.

5littleladies replied: My Dh and I have discussed this and have decided to circumcise any boys that we have. Dh feels very strongly about it and I repsect his opinions. I agree it is a personal decision. Our hope is for Dh to be able to be there with our son/s while it is done. I would feel terrible otherwise, and he feels he should be there.

kimberley replied: hmmm sounds awful the way your doc does it. i would have been disturbed too. most hospitals here will let the parents be there when it is done and there is anesthetic used so the baby usually feels no pain. we did both the boys and would do any boys we have in the future. definitely a personal choice.

A&A'smommy replied: I'm sure that was the worst sound, if I ever have a little boy I will circumsized I don't know If I could be there I would be FREAKING out but Dh and I believe in it and plus I have heard TONS of horrible stories of children who never had it done

maestra replied: Thanks for posting this- it has been a discussion in my house too. I'm against it, dh would rather have it done.

For those of you who have circumsized boys, has there been any scaring? My dh has a rather large scar from his.

MomToMany replied: My boys are circumcised, and I'd do it to any more we may have. There has been no scarring with them. Definitely a very personal decision!!

kimberley replied:
Jacob has absolutely no scarring at all. James had a tiny scar when he was smaller but i can't even see it now (not that i look that often). also, (sorry TMI ) but none of the circed men i have known had any scarring either.

alice&arik replied: When I had Arik circumcised, the doc took him down the hall without me. I didn't have a problem with that at all. The doc also talked me through everything they were going to do. He also said they use numbing stuff. When he came back like 10 minutes later, he wasn't crying at all. The doc said he cried for a sec, but that was it. And he also said he peed all over the wall when he took the diaper off . I would have it done if I had another boy. That is just my personal opinion.

Arik doesn't have any scarring either. And I don't know if this is TMI but since we are on the subject, I think they did a hack-job on Arik. The edge around his looks all jagged and stuff. I changed my nephew when he was just a few months old and his looked different, smooth line? I have always felt weird to ask. Is that normal? Arik has never had any problems with it or anything, but I am a little curious.

KatieLeigh79 replied: Sounds like Arik has some nasty scaring JR has what looks to be a little red dot on the top of his (okay I know im a parent, its odd but I had to see what damage it did) but DH has a rather large red mark where his parents had it done, so I guess it depends on the Dr. and what they use and how..

CMD3989 replied: From what I've heard I think I will leave my babies uncircumsized. It seems much better.

momof2girls replied: Reading all this just makes me glad I had girls and we are done so I dont have to worry about that, I guess its just a matter of choice and sometime religion.

KatieLeigh79 replied: Wonder how many of our DH's would kill us if they knew we were also discussing the scars that they either do or do not have *lol*

3_call_me_mama replied: Cameron was circumsized the morning after he was born, my OB did the circumsision and we were not with him. (my mom waited outside the door, she was afraid they would switch himwith someone else's kid )(It was against hospital policy to be in the room ) but if we waited until he was a few days older we could have done it at the dr's office and have been with him. We opted not to wait because we wanted all the tests etc done at once. THe interesting thing about his circumsision is that he was never cut! Our OB uses a method called plastibell, where a plastice ring is slid over the head of the penis and the foreskin is pulled over the ring and tied (essentially a tournequet). It is absolutely painless, Cameron never made a peep, anestetic is not necessary and the is NO Scarring! THe other nice thing about it is that you don't have to clean it as you would a regular circumsision. You just wipe it with a wipe when you change him and wash gently in the bath and in a few days the ring falls off (about the same time that the umbilical cord falls off) and you have no infection or anything to worry about.

WE opted to have Cameron done because DH is and we figured that since the method our OB used was painless, why not. Dh has a small scar from his but nothing that has ever caused any problems i guess.

Glad this ones a girl though, our OB is the only one at our hospital that uses this method, and two of the other OB's REFUSE to do it at all! SO we would have to wait if for some reason our DR was not around when I delivered (which would really tick me off!!! ( not the waiting, the not having him there when delivery time came! )

alice&arik replied:
So that's what they are talking about scarring. I don't know, I am going to have his looked at when he has his next checkup. His dosn't have any red marks though, looks like a normal willy to me, except for the jagged edges. Ok, I think Arik might be embarrased if he knew i was talking about it, so I am gonna quit.

Kirstenmumof3 replied:
This is how Spencers was done as well. No scarring for him either. They still did the freezing though before the procedure started.

ediep replied:
Jasonw as circed, but I never heared of this method...it is very interesting.

coasterqueen replied: I'm personally against circumsizing any future boys I have. This was a heated debate between DH and I before we knew we were having Kylie. But I listened to DH's side of the debate and feel that I have to understand where he is coming from and we will more than likely do it if we ever have a boy. BUT I told him it could only be done IF he is there to comfort him. He said absolutely not and then I said, well then it would never be done. IMO if he wants our son (hypothetically speaking) to go through the pain, he should be there comforting him and watching him go through it. I have heard it's completely painless for them though .

BTW, I guess I don't pay attention to my DH's you know what because I couldn't tell you what-so-ever if he has scarring or not. Guess I should take a look, huh?

Guest_micah replied: my 1st boy we decided not to circumcise & ended up having to do so at 1 yr. (he was put under anyway for tubes in his ear), I thought I would never want to have the procedure done either till then, he struggled constantly with infections( & we made sure he was always cleaned. )My 2nd boy, he had what was called a plasti bell. There is no surgical procedure. It is a plasiic little ring put on the end of the penis that holds the forskin back. In 5-7 days it falls off on it's own. No care to it ,like there is with the "old" way. My two older kids watched it be done. & it wasn't bad. He never fussed or cried over it. I even got to put the ring in his baby book. (he is 5 mo. now).

Maddie&EthansMom replied:

My OB also uses this procedure. No bleeding, no scarring, no cutting, no vaseline or gauze. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE my OB! He came and got Ethan and brought him back himself. He told me he didn't cry at all and when he left the nurse told me that when Dr Vines finished the circ he picked Ethan up and loved on him for 5 MINUTES! Just holding him and caressing him. I know it isn't the same as ME being in there to love on him. but I love this man and think it was wonderful that he cared enough about me and my child to do that for us. I have to add that I was on the fence about the circ, but let DH make the decision.

micah replied: I had sent a reply to this the other day, but I guess it didn't get posted. Anyway, My oldest boy (he's 10 now & would kill me if he knew I shared this story) wasn't circumsiced at birth due to our choice at the time, but at 1 year we had it done. He constantly had infections & was at the dr. We always made sure he was kept clean. We chose to have it done then only because he was being put under anyway for tubes in his ears. Otherwise I don;t know if at that point we would of put him through that. Then they did it the "old" way. I have a 5 mo. old now & the Dr. did a plasti bell procedure. He talked to me before hand & made it very clear to me that he himself didn't agree with circumcision,but of course it was my choice. He said if I chose to that this plasti bell procedure was the best way. No cutting at all. My two older kids watched him do it & they said it wasn't bad. Levi didn't even cry. It is clean & care free. The plasti bell ring falls off on its own in 5-7 days & I kept the little ring in his baby book.