Need mom/Teacher Advice

mummy2girls wrote: Jenna this year has been going to a school that is literally right behind Marcus's school he works at. You walk out the back way of his school take 3 steps and your at Jenna's school. Every morning she takes the city bus with marcus and they arrive at his school an hour before she goes to school. So he takes her in his school has breakfast and just hangs out till he has to walk her to her school. This one teacher marcus works with pretended she was mrs. claus and gave jenna 1 present a day for 5 days. Every mornings he would go to marcus's room and there would be a present from mrs.claus. Ok very nice and generous. Well the presents have not stopped. Since returning to school after christmas break Jenna has recieved... Uggs type boots, new clothes, things like books, purses, socks, etc. She even brought jenna a sluch on lunch break. went over on her spare block and read to her. I asked marcus how the heck did she be allowed near jenna? marcus says.. she asked me to write a permission note. Today he phones up and says so jenna got some valentines presents... i said oh geez what... he says 2 pillows, a blanket for her bed, purse and change purse, and socks. This teavher has kids but they are grown up( high school i think). OK IM WIERDED OUT!!! How to approach a co-worker of marcus's and be very polite but firm on how this needs to STOP! Or am i over reacting???

CantWait replied:
Umm this is nothing short of odd.

msoulz replied: OK, maybe this is paranoid, but you asked.

IMHO, any adult that expresses that much interest in a child needs to be closely, VERY CLOSELY watched and Jenna should NEVER be alone with Mrs. Claus unless you are 100% sure of her intentions.

Now it could be that she is just a lonely lady and took a liking to Jenna and it is all just over the top generous.

Or it could be that she is predatory and trying to earn Marcus' trust with intent to harm your child at some point.

It sounds like your gut is leading you down a path that is more than just generosity. If that is the case, do not ignore your gut!!

I would rather someone call me lots of ugly names and think I am nasty and paranoid than have anyone hurt my child, and I never want to say "I should have...".

Good luck, I certainly hope she is just a generous, lonely person who wants to share with Jenna.

ETA I think Marcus needs to just tell her that while her generosity is wonderful, you feel gifts are for special occasions and you also would like to be the one giving them to her. Or whatever, something like that, but it should come from Marcus. He can fully blame you if he wishes, but similar to family, it's his coworker and he should handle it.

MommyToAshley replied: I agree, that is just bizarre, and I would go to the school right now and revoke that note that Marcus wrote giving the lady permission to be around Jenna. Does that mean the school will dismiss Jenna to her too? CRAZY!

my2monkeyboys replied: I agree with all of you - Marcus should definitely let her know that the gifts and all should stop immediately, and I would certainly make it a point to revoke the permission note AND make it clear to everyone at Jenna's school that the lady is NOT allowed to visit, drop off gifts, or take her anywhere.
Better safe than sorry.

luvbug00 replied: Ita weird....too weird. Revoke that note pronto.
Has jenna ever been alone with her?
I hope not. U said jenna was having behavior issues and that can be triggered by abuse. I'm just being hypothetical right now. But what this lady is doing doesn't sound right.

mummy2girls replied:
the note was just a one time thing, the note does not give her permiossion access to her whenever she wants. And no they will not dismiss her to the lady either...

But yes I feel its very odd and im just not happy with it all now...

mummy2girls replied:
no the teacher didnt abuse her. she is never left alone with her EVER. and i know its not right its all around odd and disturbing. And the note is not for her to have any and all access to Jenna, it was just for that one time only.

mummy2girls replied:
Oh i know thats why we are now concerned. As this is very wierd for a teacher to have that much interest in Jenna. I admit jenna is sweet and the most loveable child ever known to man...LOL. BUt seriously...

we think its a lonely empty nest syndrome she is going througha nd just picked jenna... whcih we still feel is odd!

no we feel she will not harm her. We just want it to stop before it MAY lead to that... which we feel it wont but again you never know...

Oh i know he should handle it as its his coworker but mamma bear is coming out... so its hard to just sit back

coasterqueen replied: Yes, I agree, very odd. I don't know anything about this lady, so it's hard for me to comment, but if she doesn't have kids and is a bit older, maybe she just wants someone to "love". I know this isn't the same situation, but my father had a co-worker that became very close to my children, like an aunt, and she bought them presents 24/7 all the time. More presents than my parents ever have. It was strange, but the kids really liked her and so I let it go. Again, my parents trusted her, though, and like I said I don't know your situation fully. ETA: the co-worker had a grown child, but no grandchildren to love and she just really loved kids.

Boo&BugsMom replied: Do you think she might be trying to win Marcus over with her generosity?

moped replied:
I wondered this right from the start

mummy2girls replied:
yes she had 2 daughters but they are grown up... either in highschool or college.

mummy2girls replied:
not sure i never thought of that. BUt with marcus I dont have to worry if thats her intention as marcus is not that kind of guy...

~Roo'sMama~ replied: ITA, no matter what her motive is, or if she even has one beyond having taking a liking to Jenna and wanting to be nice to her, it's just a little too weird and would really bother me too! Even if you were good friends with this lady, I wouldn't want my kid getting so many presents all of the time, kwim? I'm sure it will be awkward but Marcus should definitely have a nice little chat with her and tell her you both really appreciate how thoughtful she's been and all the nice things you've given Jenna but it's gotten to be too much and you're not comfortable with it.

luvbug00 replied: I don't think they are saying Marcus would.
What they are saying is what this lady may be hoping for.
Hoping being the key word.
He needs to have words with her. Regardless of her intentions, u as jennas parents are not cool with the gifts. She needs to stop buying and giving them.

Boo&BugsMom replied:
Yes, exactly. I always tell people I trust my husband with my entire heart, but it doesn't mean I trust other people.

msoulz replied: Shelly, have you talked to her?

mummy2girls replied:
Oh i know they were not saying marcus would do that. Im just saying if that her motive good luck with that one. She can hope all she wants if thsi is the case but im not concerned about that ...LOLOLOL. Besides I would KILL marcus...HAHAHA

Oh i knw he needs to have words we talked about it the other nighta nbd its now time i think...

mummy2girls replied:
i agree

mummy2girls replied:
marcus is going too