Just needing to vent

mckayleesmom wrote: Seriously...am I the only parent on the brink of insanity? Mckaylee is the worst behaving child I have ever wittnessed. I feel bad for saying it, but she just never quits. Im seriously going to talk to the doctor about some anxiety and depression issues Im having...along with anger issues. I hate being a parent that is constanly diciplining thier child...but I don't know what else to do. Nothing works...NOTHING....Time out...corners....sitting in her room...spankings....extra attention....NOTHING. Today she got in the fridge again and smeared butter all over my room. Our walls are so horrible looking now....the butter oil left marks on the walls....plus in her room the walls are going to need painting..Ive cleaned them so many times the paint is coming off.....While I cleaned the butter off...she poured my lunch all over the desk chair. Im sick of this already. Mckaylee knows right from wrong..she just doesn't care. Nothing phases her at all. Im about to lose it.

Jamielou replied: my sister has this problem with her youngest she doesnt respond to anything time out or taking things away nothing works on her either so i feel for you....if we come across anything that might help ill let you know

oh and this sounds mean but her nickname is lucy...

mckayleesmom replied: When do the terrible twos end?

mom2tripp replied: I'm so sorry, I can't imagine what you are going through or give you any advice to better the situation, maybe she's just testing you to see how you will react I have NO idea all I can say is I'm sorry and I sure hope it gets better soon

TANNER'S MOM replied: I had a niece that was like that...

She would do it all the time..

She came to my house once..said she had PEE and poured out my Paul Mitchell shampoo and conditioner..

But I am going to say something..b/c I think you need some advice... And I don't want to think that I think I am better than you...B/C my kids are brats..but just older...

From watching Nanny 911 and Super 911..and Being a MOM To a bunch of kiddo's...do you think that if you had her on a schedule of things do to durning the day..w/ rewards and stuff she would do better...

You know 8 breakfast.. 8:30 to 9:30 Cartoon while Mom gets dress..

9:30 -10 something fun... if she has no meltdowns durning the day ..then pool time at 2..

I am just throwing something out there..b/c you seem so flustered...and that age is fun..

Dont get mad at me..b/c I am just

ammommy replied:
At 21
I'm there with you. I feel like some days all I do is scream like a banshee. Someone on another board posted a discipline technique that currently works pretty well. I'll go hunt it up for you

http://home.earthlink.net/~guin_dt_sales/id1.html Here is the link to the "truck thing". We substitute little people for Megan and dino's for Alec.

I can't wait until it gets cool enough to get outside. I think that boredom is part of our problem.

mckayleesmom replied: That is a good idea....maybe I can try something like that....maybe buy her a sticker book or something. Thanks for the idea....and I would never be mad at you....I will try anything at this point.

Insanemomof3 replied: You know, I am having the same problem. The only thing is...it is happening with BOTH my kids. Tristan is 3 1/2 now and he is just as bad, if not worse than he was at 2! He is older so knows more trouble it seems.

So no, you are not alone. I am going insane as well.

mckayleesmom replied:
I think alot is being cooped up....but its too flippin hot to take them outside....Russell is really fare skinned and turns red fast...We might go to the park later when it cools off...maybe she will burn some energy...I also found the library yesterday...maybe I can look into a reading group.

ammommy replied: One thing that I've done with the kids, which irritates Brian but he realizes that I have to do something to keep my sanity, is to put a mattress on the floor and let them jump and roll on it. I happen to have an extra crib mattress so I use that, but before we got that down from the attic, I used Alec's mattress or just the couch cushions. It burns up a lot of energy and is pretty safe since I'm right there with them.

Kirstenmumof3 replied: Trust me I know exactly what you are going through! Spencer was a little devil when he was around 2 1/2. He would dump shampoo, baby powder, soap and anything else that he could reach all over the floors. He flooded the toilet 4 times and so badly that we had to replace the tiles in the hallway. He was also bad for emptying the fridge, so I eventually we ended up putting a fridge lock on the fridge. It's a strap that sticks to your fridge, it goes onto the door of the fridge and around the side. It's not very big and I believe we bought it at Walmart. This is just a phase and she will outgrow it soon. Hang in there!

My2Beauties replied: Brianne I'm so sorry! You sound so frustrated. I agree with Mel, when she does do something good really go the extra mile and reward her - clap and cheer and make a big deal of it. Then when she does something bad, totally ignore it or punish her by making her stay in the corner (like they do on Supernanny). I hope she comes around soon! Sorry hon

ediep replied: my friends daughter is similar and she is always diciplining too. When she is over, Jason starts acting like her too. She uses the line " if you keep doing this we'll have to go home" or "if you don't listen, Jason will have to go home"
It sometimes works.

This is going to sound dumb, but have you tried locking your fridge and putting door knob covers on all the doors that she shouldn't be going in and keeping them closed? If anything, that may help the butter situation.

mckayleesmom replied: I have looked for a fridge lock,,,but can't find one...She was doing good staying out of it for a week or so...Almost thought it was just a phase,,,but then I let her watch cartoons in my room (downstairs tv is broke) and she smuggled it up with her.

Mommy2BAK replied: I'm not at that stage yet with Blakley. But I can sympathize with you. I hope things get better for you soon!

mom2three replied: Hi!
When do the terrible twos end?
When they are grown!!!!
I have a 19 and a 16 year old, and an 8 year old. My 19 year old was Awful! He threw fits and generally drove me crazy! My 16 year old was a girl and totally different. My 8 year old, (another son), was a great kid, but at 8 years old, he is a tiny bit annoying.
Motherhood, isn't it lovely? ha!
e

A&A'smommy replied: I'm sorry MIL and my SIL went through this with their first boys I think its genetic I hope not but it could be.. anyway it sounds like you need some time away I thought I was about to loose it as much as I LOVE being a mother alyssa was about to drive me nuts and vice versa so I got a job... are there any groups around you that you could join so she can play with other children and you can talk with their mothers.. that may help you with your depression as far as Mckaylee my mil and sil nearly beat their kids to death and it didn't help any they just had to grow out of those HORRIBLE phases!!

ETA: i don't agree with their way of diciplining but I'm just saying they did everything including nearly beating their kids and it didn't help but they grew out of that awful phase!

JessC replied: I have no advice, but i do agree with mel.

kit_kats_mom replied: Yeah, I'd go nuts too. I'd say in addition to a fridge lock (try amazon.com or onestepahead.com) and the other helpful advice you've gotten, just really try to do an attitude adjustment. I find that if I'm getting really irritated and I just stop and make myself pretend to be happy and in a good mood, things improve. When K is acting up I suspect it's because she needs my undivided attention. I get down on the floor with her and spend time one on one with her just listening to her and playing with her. It seems to help.
Also, I'd start keeping butter and other stuff up high in the fridge. I suppose she could draw on the wall with an orange or a zucchini but it probably wouldn't be much fun. Also, make her help you clean up the messes she makes. K was having accidents on the floor a lot last week. Once I had her clean it up they magically stopped. LOL

JAYMESMOM replied: I am right there with you. Jayme is constantly into everything she is not supposed to and she is only 18 months. She keeps me going so much that I am glad when bedtime comes. The thing that irritates me the most is she is only like that for me and my sister. She is as sweet as pie for my DH, daycare, and her grandparents. I hate it.

I just keep telling myself one day it will be her turn.

moped replied: What sort of a reaction do you give her?

redchief replied: Terrible twos end at 22
Fridge lock might help.
All the other advice is great, especially the one for you.

I used to get REALLY cranky and stay that way all day. A few years back I had some real depressing issues come up and I was a total mess... especially for a guy. One day I woke up and thought to myself, Damn! I'm the one who's making me miserable. From that day on I've tried to wake up with a positive attitude every day. It sounded dumb at first, but it really works most days (some days are just total losers; I call 'em toilet days).

mckayleesmom replied: Usually I start out with "Mckaylee...what are you thinking?" ...Then I point out what she did and tell her that we don't write on walls or play in butter. Then I usually give her time out for 2 minutes...but she usually takes off on me.

kit_kats_mom replied: You may want to get a book I just finished reading. "hidden messages" by Elizabeth Pantley.

I like to think that I'm a parent that uses all of the skills I have (most days) to do the best job I can. This book taught me that I was screwing up in the most basic ways. They are obvious once you read the book but I was saying "oh, I've done that" for almost every story/lesson. I'm currently working on two lessons right now.

1. Don't...do everything for the toddler and
2. Don't say Don't. Use positive phrasing. For example, instead of telling K "don't hit Lauren" I now say "be gentle with your sister". That way I'm not giving her ideas of naughty things to do.

parenting is really tough when you are trying to do it well. LOL

moped replied:
I have been told this before and I do try to phrase things differently

JAYMESMOM replied: My mom had a suggestion of using a bungee cord on the fridge to keep her out. She did this with my brother around that age.

mommy_loves_chase replied: my sister was having problems with one of her boys and so she put up a chart and once he got so many stars she would take him to buy a toy from the store or something else fun like taking him to the zoo i know that it seemed to work for her he stopped throwing fits because he didn't wanna lose his stars ( she would take them away when he was bad) of corse he was a bit older so i dont know