I need some advice.....

5littleladies wrote: Lst night I was doing some researching on the internet about how to maximise my chances for conceiving. I stumbled on an article on cnn that says male obesity can cause infertility, due to lower sperm counts and lower sperm quality. It can even lead to miscarriage. My dh is overweight-technically he would be termed obese although he really doesn't look it. So here's the question. Do I talk to him about this? I don't want him to feel like I am accusing him of being the problem, but it terrifies me to think that this may be a problem for us because I can't technically do anything about it. Am I overreacting? Dh has always been overweight, and I don't think he has really gained too much since Brianna was born so obviously we have been able to conceive. Should I even bother to talk to him? And if so how can I do it without hurting him?

MomToMany replied: I wouldn't be too worried about that. My DH is "big", and we haven't had a problem conceiving. I'm big, too. I wouldn't pay any attention to that article.

5littleladies replied:
Thanks Mollie-you are totally right. We've never had problems in the past. I'm just paranoid and want to do everything I can to make it work. I guess I just have to wait for it to happen in it's own time.

amynicole21 replied: I wouldn't worry about that too much, either. There are so many factors going into why we conceive or not - I doubt that something like that is the cause. Keep trying, it's going to happen!

MomToMany replied: I know it can be so frustrating to want something and not succeed at it. Then you look for something to blame for the problems, and that's not good. Try to relax, and take your time. It will happen, don't worry .

MommyToAshley replied: I can understand why you feel this way. It is so hard not knowing the reason why this miscarriage happened, and you want to do everything possible to ensure things go right the next time. But, I agree with the others. There are so many factors involved, giving birth really is a miracle. I don't think I would mention to your husband that his weight might be a factor. He may already feel a sense of guilt, and it may sound as though you do blame him (even if you don't).

That doesn't mean that you can't talk to your husband about making some lifestyle changes for the two of you. DH and I have discusses this ourselves. Maybe you can talk about the general health benefits of eating better and getting more excercise.

P&PT's coming your way... I am sure it will happen.

coasterqueen replied: I agree with everyone else. I first don't think there is much truth to that article and second it may cause more problems if you bring it up with DH. He might feel like you are trying to blame him.

I might have said this before but stress really is a road block in ttc. I know, it's so hard to not be stressed out when you've had a miscarriage and are ttc and it's not happening....but I've seen it happen to many people I know. A past co-worker and her DH had a few miscarriages and then had trouble ttc...they had tried for a really long time. They say all kinds of specialists..etc and no one could explain why they couldn't conceive. They finally decided to just NOT be stressed out about it and BAM they finally got pg. It's so funny how our bodies work.

Have you talked with your doctor about this subject? Maybe he/she have some insight on what might be the issue if any.

((HUGS))

Maddie&EthansMom replied: I'm so emotional lately....your post made me want to cry. It isn't fair of me to say I know how you feel b/c I've never miscarried, but when I was TTC I read EVERYTHING and tried SO hard every month. It is so stressful b/c you want it to happen so fast. It truly is a miracle how it happens. The one little sperm penetrates the egg and from that you get this precious little life. How does that happen??

Try not to read too much and I agree with the others that you need to relax and just let it happen. It WILL happen!! My DH is overweight, too. The internet can be a scary place when it comes to wanting to be pregnant to being pregnant.

I'm praying for you, sweetie. Hang in there.

maestra replied:
I agree with M2M- I wouldn't say anything about the ttc issues, but just promote a healthier lifestyle for the 2 of you. Dh has had some high blood pressure problems recently and is dealing with this too.

mummy2girls replied: I agree...no worries about that article. Both of my babies fathers were overweight. Aron is overwieght by at least 80 lbs and we got pregnant on the second try...

favre4fan replied: I agree about not letting the article get u down. I think stress plays more of a part than anything. I don't think it would hurt to suggest eating more healthy and getting more excercise though not for the ttc part but just for your overall health benefits.

kit_kats_mom replied: for males hot baths, saunas, tight jeans and tighty whities have also been said to reduce sperm count. That means that any of our DH's that lived in the 80's (era of painted on jeans for men) should not have been able to get us pregnant.

I think it's malarky. Ok, maybe it does reduce the count a bit but it only takes one healthy little spermie to make a baby

I agree with the others, try not to stress and maybe just talk to him about making some lifestyle changes. My DH has dropped 10 lbs in a month due to the new diet he's been on. When he told me what his doctor had said, I pictured me having to walk our DD's down the aisle years from now because he would be gone. We had a heart to heart and I explained to him how much I want him around for the girls, and me too of course. If both of us don't start taking better care of ourselves, we likely won't even see them graduate...that's depressing. Anyway, if you couch it like that, don't even mention the conceiving stuff, it may click and help to make some healthy changes.