I need lots of help here! - Baptisim questions..

MomofTay&Sam wrote: Sammy is 9 months old and still not baptised. I am Lutheran and DH is Catholic. DH does not care if we go Lutheran at all. His family is pressuring me into a christening. I believe my child should be baptisted but I am not a church goer. How do I go about doing this w/o having to met the pastor and have meetings after meetings. Thats how it was done when my oldest son was born. It was drummed into my head early on that a child should be baptised at birth or soon after to save their soul in case of death??? I am feeling wierd about this now. Like I should have done it already?? Should I do this or not?? Help guys!!

MomofTay&Sam replied: You guys can answer this however you feel, I promise I wont be offended or get upset. I am looking for some solid advice and only have you guys to turn too.

supermom replied: Man, that's a pretty loaded question (or bunch of them) - I don't think you'll be able to have him baptized without some meetings with the Pastor - at least several. I am no religious expert by any means, and we don't have Anders baptized either, but that is something we are going to wait to do so that he can make up his own mind (I wasn't baptized until I was 32 years old!).

If you feel that strongly about it, then by all means get in touch with your local Lutheran church and see what the requirements are, and discuss them with the Pastor openly - most are pretty "modern" and discuss the trappings of modern-day realities pretty well with someone who is willing to be open and honest about how they feel about it all.......

HUGS and good luck in this decision.....

~CrazieMama~ replied: I am an active church goer. Neither one of my kids are baptised, as I am Baptist. I chose not to do this because I want them to make the choice of what religion they want and if they want to be baptised or not. I do hope this helps.

MomofTay&Sam replied: Great advice so far keep it coming! My father and step mother dropped us off to church every Sunday and went to eat doughnuts and read the paper. We were always the kids standing outside when everyone had left waiting to be picked up. Does anyone want to share with me the idea that I have from somewhere about the babies soul. I dont want to start a church war but in the same breath I dont want to keep on believing that my son wont go to heaven if he isnt baptisted. What exactly is baptisim?? I am serious in this issue and want to figure out whats right and whats wrong. Like I said, I will not be offended and I care what you guys have to say.

mummy2girls replied: I was baptized in the catholic religion as was my brother. My parents did not believe in the catholic religion they just baptized us for my grandparents sake(my moms parents). As they are very strict ukranian catholics. When my son was born I baptised him before he passed away at the hospital(not catholic) and then when my daughter was born me and aron both agreed to wait until she was older for her to decide if she wants to be baptized and in what religion. I know though that if you do decide to baptize you have to meet up with the pastor and such, and even someplaces have to attend the church for awhile before hand also.

I dont know the real reason behind baptisim i think alot of people have alot of oppinions. this is my oppinion... A baby is innocent and i believe all babys go to heaven when they passaway(god forbid if that ever happens to anyone). This is my question...babys that are born asleep...they have never been baptised so does that mean they dont go to heaven? or do parents still baptise them even though they already passed away?

ediep replied: I am an active church go-er... we are catholic. My did is a deacon and he performed our wedding and Jason's baptism. The idea about the baby's soul in the Catholic religion is that the baptism wipes away the original sin that the baby is born with, so he will go to heaven. I felt strongly that Jason needed to be baptised because religion is a big part of mine and Dh's life.

If you aren't an active church go-er, then in order to get your baby baptised you would most likely need to meet with the pastor and maybe even attend a class.

Guest_jem0622 replied: I was raised Catholic. Church every Sunday until I married someone who was agnostic. He was eventually baptised, but not in the Catholic church. Our boys are baptised Catholic. I did register with my local parish, filled out a form to show who the godparents would be (one of them must be Catholic to be baptised in the church). I also attended a class. Nathan was baptised at the parish where I was raised and my parents still attend there.

Gabe was baptised at a church near our home. We registered as new parishoners, met with the pastor, and took a short class before the baptism.

It really depends on what you want you want to do in so far as rearing your child. They are definitely more curious when they are age 3-4.

There is no hard and fast rule about baptism. Even in the Catholic church. Many presume that you have to be baptised at birth, but that is not true. It just depends on how you feel about the matter.

Some faiths do not believe that a child should be baptised until they can ask to receive baptism. Instead, there is a blessing ceremony for babies/toddlers.

Hope this helps! Nathan wasn't baptised until 4 mos and Gabe was baptised at 6 mos. Your DH would definitely have to register with a parish and it would not matter if you weren't Catholic. However, he would need all of the info on his sacraments to register with the parish. They usually ask for that type of info.

Julie

jcc64 replied: I had a very intense conflict with my mom concerning the baptism of my oldest son(now 11). I was raised Catholic, although we were far from devout, in fact, we hardly ever attended church at all as kids. When my oldest son was born, my mother just assumed we would baptise him, despite the fact that my dh is an atheist. I had no intention of raising my son in any organized religion, and thus believed that the public declaration of said intention was hypocritical at best and completely disrespectful of the very religion my mom was professing to uphold. She argued strenuously about my son's soul being damned for all eternity should he pass away without baptism. My personal belief is that any God that would deny an innocent child (or anyone for that matter) entry into an "afterlife" on a "technicality" is not a spirit I could put any faith in. My own spiritual journey is incomplete, I'm not sure about a lot of things,and probably never will be, but I feel completely comfortable about this decision. Should my children express any interest or curiousity about religion in the future, I will follow their lead.
Hope my experience was in some way helpful to you. Best of luck in your decision.
Peace,
Jeanne

coasterqueen replied: Well, here is my experience.

I have never been baptized, DH has, and I really wanted to be as well as Kylie. DH does not like going to church, he was forced to do so as a child. I never got the experience to go except with other family members, my parents would not take me. That was why I was never baptized, my parents were, though.

I always felt I needed to be baptized and wanted Kylie to be, too. I mean my parents are, my sis and I aren't, DH and his family is. So when it came time to have Kylie baptized I felt I should be too.

So we got baptized together We had one meeting with the pastor, that's it. I don't go to church anymore. I did for awhile after we were baptized. I would really like to go, but until Kylie can sit still in church we are not going. I don't believe in going to church and putting her in the nursery. So we will wait until she is ready.

DH says he will never go, though. I feel bad that we don't go and people I meet from the church make me feel guilty as well. I thought it was very important to get baptized at the church my husband went to as a child and the same church we got married in. I really didn't know much about the church and the Lutheran religion before and really still don't but I do know the few times I've gone to church it is not what I am looking for. So I've been at a loss ever since.

You have to do what you feel is right for you, IMO.

5littleladies replied: I don't believe in infant baptism. I believe the ONLY way to rid oneself of sin is through faith in Jesus Christ. I wasn't baptised until I was 13 and that was because I chose to and even then I don't think it is something you have to do. There is nothing in the Bible that advocates infant baptism. The closest thing to it is when Jesus was brought to the temple when he was 8 days old to be named and dedicated. I don't believe that by not having a baby baptised your child won't go to Heaven. God knows the state of the heart and He knows when each individual is old enough to understand what sin is and therefore when they are old enough to be held accountable. I don't mean to offend anyone but this is what I sincerely believe. HTH.

Schnoogly replied: Well, let me preface this by saying that IF I believed in god it surely wouldn't be a god who would send little babies to hell because they didn't get water sprinkled on their heads. To me the doctrine of original sin (which infant baptism supposedly cleanses) is archaic, patriarchal, and horrible.

Anyhoo, it sure sounds to me like you're being pressured into this by your family. If you had really thought it was necessary you would have done it by now. I'm just getting this by the tone of your post. If you don't go to church it doesn't seem like it is worthwhile at all--the only benefit of baptism as I see it is to be initiated into a community of believers, and if you don't participate in that community, what's the point?

Just my .02

maliksmommy replied: I am sure glad you asked this question, I have had been wondering a lot of the same things you have. My mom is very insistant about me getting Malik Baptized. I was raised Catholic and went to a Catholic school and everything but as I grew older I realized that I don't believe in some of the things that the Catholic Religion is very adament about so now I don't go to church and don't feel that I am a bad person because of that. I would someday like to find a church that I feel comfortable at, but don't feel that I need that to make me complete and I definately don't feel that my son is going to Hell because he is not baptized. It is such a touchy subject it all just comes down to how you feel yourself about it and I think that is what right.

MomofTay&Sam replied: Thanks for all the great replies. I was never offended and have maybe just opened my eyes alittle more. It's a very interesting subject and times have changed so much from when I was a child.