I GIVE UP

Kirstenmumof3 wrote: I can't do this anymore! The doctors, I feel don't know what the hell they are doing! I'm not getting any answers from anyone and I'm starting to feel like I'm going crazy!

It's the weekend, so there will be no one in terms of doctors that can answer any of my questions. I'm so fed up with this darn hospital, I just can't take it anymore!

The GI team says that yes, there are definately signs of Graft-Versus Host Desease, the whole right side of his stomach is inflammed and he has an ulcer. The left side looks like alligator skin, which is related to the Graft Versus Host Deseas! Yet the BMT team says that it isn't! We won't know officially until Tuesday.

The BMT team doesn't think that it is becaue he only vomits after taking is meds. Once again I'm at a loss as to why Spencer was taking his meds so well for a week and then all of a sudden he started throwing up.

I don't know what to do anymore, I don't know what to say anymore. I don't want to talk to anyone, it's just too upsetting. I'm very depressed and right now I just don't care about anything anymore!

Maddie&EthansMom replied: Kirsten I'm so sorry!!! I cannot relate whatsoever, but I don't blame you ONE bit for being so tired and sick of it all. I can't even begin to imagine how mentally and physically exhausting this must all be for you. I only wish I could do something. Any chance you might can get out of there for awhile to clear your mind and get away from sickness and disease talk for awhile? Don't feel guilty...everyone needs some time away.

I love you and I'm praying for you, hun.

holley79 replied: Sweetie I don't know what to say. All I can do is offer up some heavy prayer for Spencer and you.

kimberley replied: i am so sorry hon. is the social worker being supportive at all? i wish there was something i could do or say. many prayers to you both.

C&K*s Mommie replied: to everyone. Many hugs. I am sooooo sorry. Do your best, as Aimee said, to clear your mind and take a break.

1lilpeanut2love replied: I am SO sorry about what is going on! I hope you get the answers that you need and are looking for!!

My3LilMonkeys replied: I'm so sorry to hear that they're making things difficult for you.

b&bsmom replied: I am with everyone else. Try and get a break, you have been so strong for so long you deserve to have to take a little time for yourself. I can not imagine what you have been going through. Hang in there you are getting closer to going home. THE DAY WILL COME SOON!!! I believe that with all my heart. lots of hugs and prayers for you

Kirstenmumof3 replied: Thanks everyone! I don't know that I have much strength left! DH will handle everything from now on. He is going to talk to our social worker on Monday and arrange a teleconference with the GI team, the BMT team, myself our Patient Representative and himself. I'm just fed up!

JAYMESMOM replied: You have been thru so much let your DH take over for a little while so you can rest. I know you are just trying to be mom but let him be dad for a while and take a brain break. I know it is hard when they will answer someone over us but just think at least you will have a straight answer.

Hang in there and you will make it thru.

Jamison'smama replied: So sorry. I cannot even imagine what you are going through. You have every right to feel tired, confused, and enormously frustrated. I am praying for your family.

A&A'smommy replied: I can totally see your frustration though the doctors should be talking to you and letting you know whats going on and not confusing you have a right to be upset!!! Stay strong sweetie and we are here for you if you need ANYTHING!!!

amymom replied: Lots of hugs, love and prayers. Take care!

gr33n3y3z replied:
Thats the best thing that could happen right now
I wish you luck with finding answers

mammag replied: Hugs and prayers for you

holley79 replied:
I hope that the conference call goes well. Something needs to give for Spencer and your own sake. Many s and prayers.