I Can't Do This Anymore

Kirstenmumof3 wrote: I just can't! Spencer won't take his medicine. This is the anti-rejection medication. If he doesn't take this he could get graft-versus host desease, he could have liver failure and he could die. I don't know what to do. I'm so angry right now. Things were going so well with the meds. I was so impressed, but now these past few days it's like pulling teeth to get him to do anything, homework, taking his medication, doing his physio. We can't go home until he can show the doctors that he is taking his medication. I'm so upset right now. I phoned my DH and told him that this was it, he needed to come down here I was leaving. I can't stay here anymore. I can't fight with Spencer anymore. I'm tired, I'm depressed and right now I just can't stop crying! I want to go home!

redchief replied: Can the doc order the meds subQ and train you to give them to him in his leg or butt? I'm thinking if he thinks he'll get a shot when he doesn't take his meds he'll reconsider his stubborness? Just a suggestion. Sorry you're having such a tough time.

huggybugboy replied: That might be a good thing to consider. Something that shows him that taking his medication is a GOOD thing. I'm sure it must be awful for him too, but he needs to understand that it will make him better.

I'm so sorry Kirsten. My family is praying for you.

mckayleesmom replied:
Ed....your good....a mention of a shot as a kid could get me to swallow a horse if I had to....anything to avoid a shot.

redchief replied:
My kids would disagree with your characterization of me as "good." They say that good and "evil" can't be that close together. Thank you Brianne.

mckayleesmom replied:
Well...when it comes to being a little "evil" vs's your child getting sick....You do whatever neccessary right?

luvmykids replied: My thoughts and prayers are still with you and your entire family. I know this whole ordeal has been a total emotional drain and it must be so frustrating to be so close to going home .... I wish I could do something to help!

redchief replied:
Those meds are a necessity, not optional. If I were Kirsten I'd do anything I needed to in order to make sure those meds get on board. Poor Spencer has to be completely sick of anything relating to health care right now after all he's been through, but sometimes tough love is the best love. Right?

At any rate, I feel for you all deeply, Kirsten.

holley79 replied: Honey you sound like you need a break. I think it would do some good for DH to come down for a day or two and you to go somewhere quite and depressurize. I think you have stretched yourself just WAY too thin there. I really can't say anything because I am not in your place. If I was there I would stay with Spencer and give you a break. I wish I was closer.

Please know that I continue to pray. I'm sure that Spencer is just as tired as you are. I can't even imagine what is going through his little mind. for you both sweetie.

Kirstenmumof3 replied:
Thanks Everyone!

Ed, The only alternative is in a liquid form and I've been told that it tastes awful! I gave Spencer some gravol at 9:30 waited until 10:30, he wouldn't take the med. So I called the doctor on-call and he told me to try to get him to take the med. Well I just forced him to take it and he threw up! So now he is sleeping in my bed and I feel awful because I didn't believe him when he told me he was feeling nauseaus. He has lied so much today, I just thought he was trying to be difficult!

Anyway I called the doctor back and he said that we should just consider this a missed dose and to call the nurse in the morning and find out what I should do. He also thinks that now Spencer has developed an aversion to taking his medication and that now he will throw up everytime! GREAT! Just what I needed to hear!

ilovemybaby replied: Sorry I don't know how old he is. I was going to suggest mixing the medication in with his drinks or food... but if he is over 2 or 3 he would probably notice. I'm sorry you are having trouble. I would ask the doctor if he can give him a shot instead.

MamaJAM replied:

mom21kid2dogs replied: Some days are just so hard it hits you like a ton of bricks!

b&bsmom replied: I know you are streched to your limit and you just can not take anymore. I think it would be very good for dh to come and give you at least some back up if not a break. I hope they can find a way that works for both of you. I can not imagine how frustrating and heartbreaking this must be for you. You have been so strong and I don't know of anything else you could do that would make things better. I will be praying for you still and I hope everything works out quickly for you.

na81 replied: I am sorry you all have to go through this! As others have said, I wish there was something I could do to help! You and your family are in my thought and prayers!! Hope things get better for you and your little guy!

coasterqueen replied:
Kids.

Kirsten, I think Ed has an EXCELLENT idea.

CantWait replied: Kristen, I'm so sorry. I can't imagine how fustrating this is for you. Try and take a break for a couple days if you can. I'm sure Spencer is just as tired of this as you are, I can't imagine how tired of fighting he is right now.

redchief replied: Oh Kirsten, I'm so sorry. Don't feel badly about not believing he felt sick though. With all the poor boy has been through I can't really say I blame him for developing an aversion to his meds. Of course that doesn't help you much...

Can the liquid medicine be mixed with a drink, perhaps? Something to at least offset the nasty taste, or must it be taken on an empty stomach. I'm not thinking about tricking him, I think you have to keep reinforcing his need to take it. I'm just trying to come up some ideas to make his medicine more palatable and at least let you and Spencer think you have some kind of choice.

Kind of like this, "I know you hate this stuff, Spencer, but you need it or you're going to get even more sick. We have a couple of choices though, either the tablets or the liquid. We can mix the liquid with "insert a drink he likes here" if you really can't stand the pills. How do you want to do it?"

I don't know! I sense your frustration and feeling of helplessness. Did the doc's office have any other recommendations?

kimberley replied: sorry i am reading this late. my prayers are with you both. i know how much you want and need to go home and i am sorry things aren't going so well. is dh gonna switch with you for a while?? i think you going home even for a week or two could be just what you need to rejuvenate and face it all again.
if there is anything i can do, just call.

ions_momma replied: I am so sorry to hear this. I know that it is very hard for you, and I think you are such a strong person to go through all of it. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers!!

TLCDad replied: I am so sorry to hear this. I can't believe there is not version of the med that can be taken as a shot. But like others have mentioned maybe mix it with some kind of liquid can help.

It is good his dad is coming in to take over for a bit... you need a break and some rest.

My prayers are with you, Spencer and your family.