Husbands & Stress?

KatieLeigh79 wrote: I guess I'm at a loss as to what to do with DH anymore.. today we had a rather long drive to my cousins Graduation open house, and we started talking on house life, finances etc while mini-me snored away in his car seat and he had the guts to tell me that the only real stress in his life is me? I guess I'm at a loss, sure I'm just a mom and don't make any $ but ..... I just wonder if it is really that bad to live with me? If so then why bother, my little man and I could make it on our own if need be....

Sorry just needed to vent, not sure what to think of this new revelation he's made in his life...

mummy2girls replied: OH HUN((((HUGS)))) men can say the most inconseiderate things at times. MAkes you want to slap them silly!

alice&arik replied: OMG hun I am sorry!! I read that and my heart just sank. He needs some Have things been good until now? I hope you can work things out with him. Go ahead and vent, that is what we are here for!

KatieLeigh79 replied: Just not sure what else I can do for him, I cook, clean, don't require him to do anything for mini-me, granted I have been snapping at JR when he gets into his temper tantrum phases and complaining when Todd goes and wastes 500 for no reason, but it is to the point now that if im so much stress why bother keeping me around? It's so terrible to feel this way just don't know what to do to make him see what he has here with me isn't that bad...

A&A'smommy replied: ((((BIG HUGS))))) I cannot believe he said that! Men do say some inconsiderate things but that sounds to me like you really REALLY need to talk to him about that! ((((BIG HUGS))))

alice&arik replied: I agree with Jessica, maybe you should sit down and talk about it with him. I guess I am not one for advice either because me and my BF are in the same boat but on opposite sides, I want to get away from him. But it did help to talk about everything, because I usually keep everything in and then when I DO talk I explode with everything.

amynicole21 replied: Sounds like he was lashing out at you for some reason I'm so sorry. If he knew just how badly his words have affected you, it would probably break his heart. I think you should try to sit down and have a talk with him. Ask him exactly what he expects out of your relationship, and have him tell you what he thinks needs to change. At least then he has to back up his hurtful comments with something that makes sense. I'm so sorry. Please vent to us anytime

ediep replied: Oh man, I am so sorry he said that to you! Some men just don't think before they speak!!!

I totally agree with Amy, have him give you specifics to back up what he is saying.

Good luck

kimberley replied: i am sorry for what you are going through. the way DH said what he did may be harsh, but maybe he didn't mean it to be. i know that my DH could say the same thing to me a million times a day but he only means that because i am always so tense and stressed out, he worries about me and it causes him stress. i suffered from PPD for a long while after Jade was born and he lived each day walking on egg shells not knowing what was going to set me off in tears or in rage. when you live like that long enough, it becomes a tense place and difficult marriage. i know. i lived it. but since DH and i really started talking and more importantly... listening to each other, things have been great. another thing that has helped is me getting a bit of my independence back so i don't put so much pressure on DH to be my only connection to the adult world. i am a happier person now. if you ever want to talk, PM or email me. i always have an ear to listen and a shoulder to cry on.

MommyToAshley replied: Sounds like your DH needs a on the head. I agree that he probably didn't mean it, and that men just say stupid things sometimes. I hope you are able to have a talk with him and straight things out.

momof2girls replied: Sometimes people say things that dont mean, so talk to him
if he did mean it tell him there are more fish in the sea and you are a good catch!

Zoe'sMommaCamie replied: oh man i'm sooo sorry. guys are such jerks sometimes when keith says things lik that i tell him to shut up and speak with his head not his penis. men think before they say things. i hope everything works out well for you. ((((((((((BIG HUGS)))))))))))!!!

Kirstenmumof3 replied: I'm so sorry your husband said this! I would talk to him about this and maybe suggest marriage counselling to get to the root of the problem! Don't worry about the vent that's what we are here for!

aspenblue1 replied: I am sorry he said that to you. I would definately talk to him about it and let him know exactly how it made you fee.

coasterqueen replied: Sorry he said that to you.

I don't know your situation well, but do you think he said that because he's the only one bringing money in? I mean did he want you to be a SAHM or did you tell him you were going to be that way and that's that? I ask because if he feels like the only one bringing in money and he didn't expect it maybe it is stressing him out.

Either way he shouldn't have said it like that. I think may you both should sit down and have a heart - to - heart.

My2Beauties replied: WOW (((HUGE HUGS))) I am so sorry that DH felt like he needed to blurt that out! You guys need to talk, sometimes my fiance would say things to hurt me like that and I totally took it the wrong way, once I told him how his words hurt me, he changed his whole tune and now he is much more considerate and loving! If DH truly does feel this way, maybe you guys should seek marriage counseling, or you should sit down and say what is that I can do to not stress you out as much, if it seems fair enough, try it! If it seems as if he is just fed up all together, well then, I dont' know what to say. Men can be so rude sometimes and they don't realize what emotional basketcases us women are, especially if we have PPD, which I had and still have a touch of. I had to totally change my outlook on everything because I felt the world was agianst me. And you know who helped...these ladies on this forum! Ever since I posted my frustrations and my concerns, my life has made a complete turnaround and I have taken that negative anger and turned it into a positive! Hun, please e-mail if you want to talk. I'm your shoulder to cry on. Please don't let this get you totally down.....maybe he just said it because he was in a bratty mood!

Maddie&EthansMom replied: ITA with Kimberly....I just don't think he meant it the way it came out. Make him elaborate on his comment. It will make you feel better....I know it will. I used to take my DH the wrong way ALL the time. Finally we both started communicating better.

Let us know how it goes.