How can people be so insensitive? - Expecting a boy vs. girl

juliajaj wrote: DH & I found out today that we're expecting a little girl. My level II ultrasound was this morning. The u/s technician & doctor said everything about the baby looked picture perfect. We wanted to find out if it was a boy or girl, and the u/s tech & doctor said it looked like a girl. Olivia is 19 months old & will be just about 2 years old when baby #2 is born. It didn't matter if baby #2 was a boy or girl to DH & I. The most important thing is that our baby is blessed with good health. Yes, part of us thought it would be nice to have a boy to have a "matched set", but that doesn't mean that we're disappointed that we're having another girl. I have a sister that's 1 1/2 years older than me & we share a special bond that we probably wouldn't have if it were a brother/sister relationship. I'm not saying that brothers & sisters can't have close relationships, it's just different (I have 4 older brothers & 2 older sisters that I have great relationships with). So as you can see, we feel blessed no matter if our baby is a boy or girl.

One of the guys that DH & I work with (we work for the same company), told me congratulations, but he also said he ribbed my husband about there must be something wrong with him since he couldn't produce a boy. WHAT?!? What an insensitive, immature & chauvinistic thing to say. Since I was in an office I couldn't display my feelings as to how this statement hurt me. I told him that you can't select the sex of your child, this is God's plan. We're blessed with a healthy child & that's the only thing that matters. He tried to appologize, but then said that every man wants a son. Ugh!! I told him that we could always adopt if we want to have a son. Gender selection is out of our hands when it comes to conceiving a baby. At this point I turned my chair around, so my back was facing the guy & quit talking to him. He appologized again & said he was just teasing. I'm sorry, but I don't find this funny at all. By him "joking" that there's something wrong with DH or I since we aren't having a boy, in my eyes he thinks having another girl means we're defective. He & his wife his wife have 1 boy. I told him that there aren't any guarantees that when he & his wife are pregnant again that they'll have a girl. He kept on appologizing, so I think he knows that I don't appreciate his careless jokes.

I just can't understand how people can make these type of statements. We're lucky enough to be able to have children. I know several couples & people on this board that have been trying for a long time to have children. I'm sure to them it wouldn't matter in the least if they have a girl or boy.

Sorry for rambling & ranting, but I feel much better after speaking my mind here.

Julie

Kirstenmumof3 replied: People don't think before they open there mouths! Try not to be too hard on him, I think he probably was just joking with your DH! CONGRATULATIONS on your new little baby GIRL! I'm so happy for you! I too have an older sister and when we were growing up we were very close! I think it will be great for Olivia to have a little sister!

A&A'smommy replied: (((BIG HUGS))) That was very rude of him to say that! Some people need to think before they speak! Congrats on having a baby girl!!! c

kimberley replied: i am sorry your co-worker was so rude and insensitive. i got a lot of that "teasing" when i was pg with Jade saying i don't make girls and it's a shame if i have another boy. people really don't think before they talk. hopefully you have showed him his jokes are in very poor taste.

congrats on your baby girl!! you are so right, every baby is a blessing regardless of gender.

aspenblue1 replied: That is very insensitive.

Congrats on having another baby GIRL!!!

MomToJade&Jordan replied: Welcome to the pink team. I would have been upset at that guy too. When and if we decide to have another baby I would like a boy, but if we have another girl that's great too. All I want is for them to be happy and healthy.

ediep replied: Rude Rude Rude!!!

Congrats on the Pink News!!!!

mummy2girls replied: Thats pretty insensitive for him to say! CONGRATS on having another girl. I have to disagree with the guy with what he said but mostly from one comment on how every man wants a son.. That is so untrue. My dad wanted nothing but girls and jennas dad Aron wanted a daughter not a son. And if he ever has more kids he wants girls.

*Heather* replied: I totally know what you mean. We have a neighbor who has 6 girls. And he keeps busting my DH's balls about us having another girl. He keeps saying how weak DH is... HA little does he know, girl spermies are stronger than boy spermies...so there...NANANANA.

A lot of people are making comments about us having another girl...but I just blow them off....I love girls, THey are the best (a little bias is all).

Congrats on your little girl!! Welcome to the pink team!! And it is so true...every baby is a blessing!!

MomToMany replied: Congratulations on your little GIRL!!! I'm the opposite, though. I had 3 boys and then a girl (don't know what #5 is). I always hear comments about "finally getting a girl" and the like. It makes me SOO mad!! And now, it's the "trying for another girl" comments! People can be so rude!!!

Lots of to you!!!

Julie (jem0622) replied: People say and do stupid things. I am sorry that you were a witness to it, especially when it is a time that you are happy to have a healthy baby growing in there. Congrats on the girl! I have an older sister (by 13 mos) and a younger brother (2 1/2 yrs my junior) and we both have different relationships...but we are very close.

Julie

MommyToAshley replied: Congrats on your addition to the PINK team!

How RUDE! Sometimes people just don't realize how insensitive they can be... and as you probably already know, it only gets worse once the baby arrives.

5littleladies replied: Congratulations on your girl! I love girls (of course I have 3 of them). That's too bad about your co-worker saying that. Sometimes people don't think before they talk. I'm kind of expecting comments like that when I get pregnant again if it's a girl.

Congratulations again!!

Kaitlin'smom replied: Some peopel just dont know when not to talk, I got some 'its about time' DH and I had been married almost 8 years before I got PG tell you I about slapped them, course now I get so when are you having another? Gurrrrrr

Sorry you had to indeer such rude behavior......


PS CONGRATS on the girl!

Hillbilly Housewife replied: yeah... and then if yo uiDO trn out to have a child of the opposite sex as your other kid, the comments of *so are yo ugoing to get fixed now?* or *oh how lucky - you have one of each! now you can stop, right?* or even *you have the perfect family, why make yourself even poorer?*

you're so lucky! I'd LOVE another girl. Who knows...maybe a couple years from now!

Elle replied: Congratulations on your new little girl! As you said, there are people who can't have children at all, we must feel really blessed to have babies, no matter if they're boys or girls!
I went through a similar issue with a certain person when I had Brighton (third kid, only boy for now). This person had no better idea than to tell me: "Wow, Nathan (my boyfriend) finally got a little man! I'm sure he was hoping for this one to be a boy!"
I got really upset. Nathan didn't care at all about the sex, if Brighton had been a girl instead of a boy he would have been equally happy. But people are sometimes stupid and don't think before opening their mouths! Oh well, what can you do?

amynicole21 replied: Aw! Congrats on your little GIRL I'm sometimes surprised at the stupidity of some people... I'm sorry your co-worker didn't think before opening his mouth