Having a Panic Attack - Vent

CantWait wrote: I just keep thinking about the next year. My EI is now up, so I have no money coming in. DH's pay goes strictly towards the bills, and there's not anything left for extras. Now there's no money for Robbie's extra activities like swimming lessons, or tae kwon do, I got no money to get clothes before we go to Toronto which I need cause all I got is jogging pants since I haven't lost any of the baby weight. My dog's ear infection is back, his hair is still falling out, and the vet's visits are too much, and I can't pay for them. I keep thinking about school this year, and how I gotta take out a loan for the tuition and daycare for Anthony plus before school care for Robbie. By the time I'm finished my course, the original cost of $9000 is going to be close to $20,000. I'm wondering if it's going to be worth going to school, or if I should just work, so that my kids can have everything they want, need and deserve.
I'm hoping I've got one cheque left....Robbie has a competition next week for tai kwon do, and I've got to pay for his lunch program and a couple little things. I'm so use to having money for things since I'm always working I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't wanna work while going to school cause it's too much taking care of the kids, going to school and work, and dh is leaving again in January which is half way through my course.

Sorry for the ramble, I just needed to vent and dh doesn't understand.

amynicole21 replied: Oh hon, I'm so sorry you're stressing about this. I hate money. Well, I don't really hate money, just the lack of it I guess It sucks that in order to get a better paying job, we have to go to school, but we can't afford going to school without working because the kids still have to be in daycare! I am going through this exact dilemma right now.

My opinion is that you should take care of YOU in this instance. Your kids will benefit from a happy mommy, and you will be happier knowing you haven't sacrificed your life for anyone elses. Of course, this is easier said than done.

alice&arik replied: I'm sorry you are going through this now. I know how you feel. I tried going to school last summer and working full time. Plus I was a single parent. It was really tough. And I havn't gone back since. But I plan on going back for dental assistant this fall since it is a short course. All I know is that last summer I didnt' get much sleep and I missed out on a lot of Arik's milestone's.

I don't know if this is too personal, but what are you going to school for? I want to do the dental assistant program so i can work as that while i go for my RN that I have always planned on.

Don't get too stressed out, it just makes things worse, try to relax. It will all work out.

MommyToAshley replied: I am sorry you are going through such a rough time. I have to agree with Amynicole... I think you should do what you can to go to school and take care of yourself. I think kids this age don't really care about all the extra things, they'd rather have time with Mommy. (Now, teenagers are a different story. LOL.)

Could you rearrange some of your classes and take them at night so your DH coudl watch the kids and you wouldn't have to pay as much for daycare? Just a thought.

A&A'smommy replied: (((BIG HUGS))) I wish I had some advice but I don't all I have is my support for you! I think the other girls are right though and that you should do something to make you happy because when you get done with school think about what you can do plus the extra money (if you choose to work).

pinka_star replied: I'm sorry you're going through this. I totally understand where you're coming from. I'm in the same boat right now. DH's pay check goes strickly to the bills and food in our tummies. Other than that, we have no extra spending money really. I'm planning on going back to school this fall semester. I know how tough it will be for us, but this is really important to me, and I need to finally do something for ME. I think you should do the same, do this for yourself. It will be hard, but worth it in the end!

coasterqueen replied: Sounds like a tough situation.

I'm not sure what I'd do. I have the same predicament about wanting to be a SAHM. I *could* be one if we sold our house, land, cars and moved in to a tiny apartment, but that land means more than anything to DH so I choose to work. We also wouldn't have any extra money for Kylie to do anything or help pay for her college. Ryan and I grew up very poor in a rich school district and it was awful growing up that way. We also had to live extremely poor just to make it through college and have student loans now that we'll be paying through the time Kylie is a sophmore in college. These are all reasons I had to tell myself that working was the best for Kylie in the long run. My parents worked and we turned out ok, I guess. That's not an excuse, but the good thing is Ryan and I don't work near the hours my parents worked, so that makes me feel a bit better. We'd also not have any health benefits or pension for our future if I didn't work.

It's just a tough situation for anyone in it. I wish there was something I could say to make it easier. Geesh, I wish I could wish we all won the lottery. Money stinks.

kimberley replied: (((hugs))) Marie. i am sorry you are going through tough times lately i wish i could help. i am in the same boat with you as far as EI is concerned. mine is about to run out too. school is a tough call. you have to decide if you can handle taking care of the kids and studying without any help. it is hard. i went to college for a couple of semesters and ended up quitting because it got too much and i was pg with Jade. now i have a $10G debt for nothing

don't you qualify for subsidized daycare? if you haven't already, you should look into it. that was the only way i was able to go back to school. even the private after school program i had Jacob in had their own "in house" subsidy for low income families. i wouldn't have known that if i didn't ask them.

good luck with your decision.

My2Beauties replied: I am actually a senior in college right now, have been in school since I graduated in 1999 and I know it's hard. When I had Hanna I had to drop down to part-time and take night classes. I work through the day and take night classes a couple times a week and while it's hard, it gives you a sense of accomplishment and it's well worth it in the long run for you and your family! I know it's hard, I've felt like giving up several times but you can do it. Could you work through the day and take a couple night classes? Or find a job that will work with your schedule? I know that is easier said than done! Best of luck and lots of ((HUGS)) coming your way! Hang in there!!

CantWait replied:
Not to personal at all. I'm going to go for Medical Office Administration for Unit Clerk.

CantWait replied:
Unfortunetly it's a set scedule. Monday-Friday 7:00am-12:00pm, dh will also be gone after the first 4 months of the course so it wouldn't matter either way

CantWait replied:
That truly does stink Kimberley. I haven't checked into subsidy yet. I don't think we will qualify for basically the same reasons I wouldn't qualify for a student loan through the government. We supposedly make to much money. However if you look at our budget and our bills, we make poop.

CantWait replied: Thanks everyone. I guess we'll just have to see what happens with the test next Wednesday to see if I can even get into school. I'm not really worried to much about spending time with the kids. Robbie was in Daycare when I finished my highschool and he loved it, and I was always able to fit quality time in for him. I know what some of you mean though. I just wanna be able to give them the best. I didn't have a whole lot growing up and grew up in a crappy area, so I just want to make sure my kids have the best they can.
You guys are great