Drawing/writing - A bit behind?

DansMom wrote: As a prefatory note, I'm not anxious or concerned about Daniel overall, as he seems to be developing as a well-rounded and intelligent child. I just can't get him to engage with coloring/drawing/writing AT ALL. I'm worried that I tried too hard at times early on and intimidated him, because whenever I try to engage him in artistic pursuits, even making things out of playdo, he wants me to do the sculpting and drawing. So last week I thought let's give this another go, and tried not to take over and do anything for him or tell him how to do anything, but just encouraged him to make pictures in his own way. He would scribble a bit and then put down the crayon and say "I can't!" and "Mommy draw!" It bums me out to see him so frustrated, and also not getting any of the practice that will build his confidence. I think I made some headway when I had him hold my hand while I drew something, and also showed him (although he was resistant) a better way to hold the crayon to have more control. He made some spirals and seemed VERY pleased with himself. I think he's going to be a perfectionist. I thought initially that my drawing pictures with him would be motivating, but apparently it just intimidated him. Any ideas? Or similar experiences?

I guess I want him to be able to participate in preschool art activities---he's WAY ahead of the curve on things like tricycle operation, but that's not a skill they value much at preschool...

coasterqueen replied: Hmm, not sure what to say. Kylie will draw (scribble) but she has no interest in writing per se. If I ask her to write her name she comes up with this big bunch of scribble on a paper but she won't trace letters on paper or anything like that. \

I don't know, I guess this is one area/*milestone* I'm not sure about when they are supposed to learn. I wasn't stressing it as much because I thought that is something you teach them at preschool age and technically Kylie has a year before she has to go to preschool.

luvbug00 replied: Ohh poor baby. Mya gets stressed like that too. She also took some time to learn to write and now she is doing the same with reading. Getting thew 1 page is hard with her. she gets very fustrated.

maestra replied:
Exactly. Don't worry about how they hold the crayon or anything. Just give them the materials and keep them from writing on the table/walls. I rarely draw with Jaci, because I don't want her to feel like she has to live up to my drawings (which aren't any good anyway).

At 2-3, their drawing is really just scribbles and experimenting with color. As they get to the 4-5 range, more of what we think of as drawing will emerge. HTH!

DansMom replied:
It does help!! Thank you! I was looking at a parenting book about areas of development, and got worried when it seemed to suggest that attempts at representational drawing would be starting about now. I know those charts are just averages and not "goals" to set for your child, but it helps to hear a teacher reinforce the idea that just scribbling is normal at this age.

coasterqueen replied:
Yes I agree. It is nice to know that scribbling is normal at this age.

Do any of you notice when they do scribble they *see* something in their drawings that you may not? Like Kylie will draw something and say that it's a butterfly and it takes me about 10 stares but by gosh I finally see that butterfly.

amynicole21 replied: Sophia will rarely draw something on purpose... she usually scribbles, then finds something in it (look Mommy, see the robot?). I have seen her draw a person once, and it was really good! A head and legs primarily, but it DID look like a person That is not the norm though. She also has no interest in trying to make letters. It's all stuff that will come in time I guess, but it's still difficult not to wonder what the hold-up is

mckayleesmom replied: I think you just have to let them do it on their own...I will sit Mckaylee down at the table and give her a piece of paper or print pages for her to color off pbs.com,,,,but it took her a long time to get interested in not EATING the crayon. Now she is obsessed with drawing.....I usually only draw little things for her...like trace her hand and let her try to trace mine and then let her be...shes only 2 though.....I also have to watch her because she likes to decorate the house too and smuggle crayons out....so she is now only allowed 1 crayon at at time.

Hillbilly Housewife replied: Zach can drawa a sun.

it sorta looks like a crappy circle, with 3 squiggles in it (eyes and mouth) and some zigzags across it - the rays.

It really does look crappy.... but it IS a sun.

MommyToAshley replied: Ashley does both, she will scribble but she will also draw or write letters.

But, I really wouldn't worry. Like you said these are averages. I think our children have their own interest and abilities. When I hear your stories about Daniel's musical talents and how he can play songs on the drums, I am amazed. Ashley would just bang two sticks together and say that she is making music. He'll start drawing and writing when he is ready, right now he just has other interest... nothing wrong with that.

Ashley is the same way as Daniel. If I correct her on how to say something or show her how to do something, she won't try again while I am there, she'll just say "No, you do it". But, then if I leave the room she will attempt to do it on her own. So, I try not to correct her or show her how to do something but sometimes I jsut forget.

Josie83 replied: Good advice from our resident teacher Michaelle

I think he's doing fine, its hard not to worry but they can't develop brilliantly in all areas all at once. It'll come with time! Just let him play and experiment on his own and I'm sure he'll soon be creating artistic masterpieces with th ebets of them And there's worse things to be than a perfectionist xx

ediep replied: Jason just scribbles too, actually he has just figured out how to draw a circle, but thats about it. He is really into wwaaayyyy more physical things right now...jumping, riding his tricycle, running, he really doesn't want to sit and draw.

jcc64 replied: He sounds right on target, Tracy. My boys didn't even attempt their names until preschool (by that, I mean age 4). I didn't see it as a priority, tbh. I'm sure kids can be "trained" by parents to acquire "school readiness" skills at an early age, but really, what's the rush? When he's interested in fine motor skills, he'll pick them up immediately b/c it will be important to HIM. In the meantime, I would back off from any sort of guidance where the creative arts are concerned- let him hold the pencil however he wants, don't try to get him to draw representational images. Just let him revel in the creative process. Everyone called Jackson Pollock a visionary for merely replicating what comes naturally to kids.

maestra replied:
Amen! I wish I could get half of the nation to think like you do- then maybe I wouldn't have so many stressed out kindergarteners in the first few weeks.

ian'smommy replied: Ian only scribbles at this point but he always sees something in it... He will tell me it's a dog, or something else.. He does fairly well at imitating though. If I draw a circle he does the best he can to imitate the circle. The same with making lines on a paper. I am not concerned in the least about his drawing skills....

DansMom replied: When I reread my post, I sound like such a neurotic parent Thanks for the advice to lighten up, and I agree with that advice wholeheartedly. You know, sometimes I overcompensate for the fact that I am not a SAHM, working full time, and out of guilt about my long absences I try to be very "guiding" and engaged when I'm with him. Things always go better, though, when I let things flow naturally and focus on domestic needs in general (dinner, dishes, etc.), creating family time without being right on top of what he's doing.