Don't like photos of yourself.... - give it some thought

grandma wrote: When my kids were small, I was thin, but I thought I was fat. I was 5'8" and weighed from 115 - 130 (fat lol). So when my sil would take film of our families at gatherings, I would hide behind a chair, behind a wall, but usually would make sure I wasn't in the pictures. I did that from 1976 - til 1991.
Last summer my family went to visit my sil at her vacation home in Utah. She had taken all that film and had it put on dvd, with music. It was so beautiful becuz it was our boys, her boys as babies, her and husbands parent's, plus other siblings, relatives, etc. People that had passed.
My new husband wanted to know why I was in so few pictures. And then it hit me how sad I was that I hid all those years, it was like I wasn't there, when in fact I was always there. If I could take it back I would, but I can't. And now I'd kill to be as thin as I was back then (in my hiding years).
Just thought you might not want this to happen to you.

luvmykids replied: WOW, my MIL and I just had this same EXACT conversation this morning

You're very right, and God forbid something should ever happen to me, I want my kids to at least be able to look back at photos and see me in them, with them, hopefully whether I'm around or not they'll be able to see the joy and pride in their moms eyes when they look back

holley79 replied: I am the one usually behind the camera. I am a little disappointed with myself because I hate having my picture taken but not I realize there aren't very many pictures of my daughter and I together.

grandma replied:
Let someone else take pictures too, you'll miss those in years to come!

Boys r us replied: I know what you're saying is true..and I do have pictures of me with my kids..most of them I have some stupid expression on my face and look silly with my eyes half open half shut etc etc..I'm not photogenic AT ALL..so while my kids will have pics of me..those pics will not be shared with the rest of the world...why would I torture myself like that? LOL Ya know..

grandma replied:
You look pretty/cute to me...kwim?...lol

Boys r us replied: LoL..I guess that's where what I was saying about non-legitimate flaws comes into play! When I see my pics, I see 30 extra pounds, I see a scar above my eye, I see teeth I wish were whiter, see dark circles under my eyes etc etc etc I am my own worst critic and I guess to some degree that is normal...but I have huge body image issues, even when other people don't think it is warranted, it makes it difficult to post pictures. and I mean, what's someone going to say, OMG you're so unattractive. No..lol..I could post my worst pic ever on here and people would reply, "Ohh that's a great picture, you're beautiful" even if that's NOT what they're thinking in their head! LOL

Boys r us replied: But I did want to add..THANK YOU for your reminder to us, b/c what you said is SO SO true! Even though I do take my pics with my kids, I don't take enough!

and also, thank you for the compliment! LOL

grandma replied: Your welcome! Sounds like you see way too much in that mirror. When you get older your gonna see that you didn't look like you think.
If there's any way I could help someone not make some of the silly mistakes I did, I'm all about that.

My3LilMonkeys replied:
That is EXACTLY the mentality I have....I carry more weight than I should, I have crooked teeth, I feel I'm 'ugly' in general....so even when people compliment my photos I'm thinking of course they're going to say it's a good picture...who's going to tell someone else they look terrible? It's nice to know I'm not a complete freak.....

Anthony275 replied: i usually "mysteriously" move out of the room when those things are happening. i dont regret it, and i sure dont want people watching videos with me in them when im dead

grandma replied:
Honestly other people don't look at pictures of you the same way you do, that's a given. Others are much less critical...really!

kimberley replied: i needed this reminder. thanks.

grandma replied:
So your relatives will say "Anthony who, what did he look like?"

Anthony275 replied: i wouldn't care, that's how i am. why should i do something thats way out of how comfortable i am?

grandma replied:
At your age, I loved having pictures taken of me...lol

Anthony275 replied: well that's with two different people

Calimama replied: That's a good reminder. I don't mind pictures but I think I could do a better job of making sure I'm not the ONLY one taking them.

grandma replied:
you know most cameras have timers....great feature!

Insanemomof3 replied:
so I am 5'5 and 150 lbs. Am I fat? Oh and I agree with you about being in pics to remember.

Danalana replied: This is a very good point. I need to be more conscious of it.
My father stole all my baby pictures when my parents divorced, except for one...MAYBE two. So there's going to be little record of my existence, as it is.

lovemy2 replied: You are a very wise person - thank you for sharing

grandma replied:
No, you're not!
I had a very bad body image. I never thought I was thin enough. I would say I was on the verge of anorexic, but back then there was no such thing.

MommyToAshley replied: You make a very good point that hits home with me. Thanks for sharing your wisdom and experience with us.

grandma replied: Gosh thanks, I'm really glad I decided to post that!

CantWait replied: I hear ya. I only took 1 picture of myself when I was pregnant with Robbie and I was in a bikini. I looked at it one day and was disgusted, and threw it away.

I really regret that now cause it was the only pregnant picture I had with him.
I don't have many with Anthony, but I still got a few.

coasterqueen replied: Good advice...I need to give this to my Dh to read. He's more like this than me. He forces me to get my pic taken whether I look like crap or not.

My2Beauties replied: Wow, great words of wisdom there. I take TONS of pics, I always have, I love having my pic taken. My DH is the opposite, I need to remind him of this.

Sam & Abby's Mom replied: I've been thinking about this alot lately. Even my niece commented that all of our pics are of the kids or the kids with Daddy. I'm in very few, usually because I dont have any makeup on. When I do have make up on - I'm usually too busy to remember to ask someone to take my pic with the kids. This is something I really need to work on.

Its great to have someone confirm what I've been thinking - that I will regret not being in many pictures with my kids. Thank you for the reminder!

:.Mrs_Mommy.: replied: My Mom talked to me about this a while ago too. Looking back on my childhood, and looking at pictures of it, there are not many pictures of my mom and I have forgotten what she looked like back then. I really don't want my children to forget what I looked like.

My son tells me everytime I put on a shirt I haven't worn in awhile or ask DH how I look that I am the most beautiful mom he has seen.

If he thinks I am beautiful than that is enough for me to take pictures of myself.

When we get family pictures done I will post them so you guys can see my beautiful family.

A&A'smommy replied: I try not to be too weary of the camera, I have been taking a LOT of pregnant photos and I actually kinda like to have my picture taken I'm not skinny or gorgeous or anything and I see LOTS of flaws BUT I want my kids to look back and say wow mom you looked great... so young blah blah Thats a GREAT reminder thank you for sharing with us!!!!

Maddie&EthansMom replied: I've never been known to hide from a camera. I don't like every picture that is taken of me, but there are plenty there for my kids to choose from.

Jackie012007 replied: very true - my grandma died very quickly from cancer (she knew she had it and didn't say anything until she was dying) and we don't have any pictures of her because she was heavy and self-concious. She died when i was 7 and I barely remember her and only have 2 pictures of her.

I feel bad because I don't have many pictures of me bring pregnant with Carly - some early ones, but none when I was 6 months and up! I only have a pic from the day I had her. I wish I had gotten those cute professional ones done while I was pregnant!

I tend to be the picture taker too - carly is just so darn cute when she is hanging out with daddy! But I need to get more of myself in there so it doesn't end up like it did with my grandma.

msoulz replied: Have I mentioned how nice it is to have your wisdom here on the board Grandma? I really appreciate it!!

grandma replied:
Thank you so much. I'm really glad I posted that story, all of your response made me feel like I may have helped some of you out. Usually my comments are just for fun.
Really when I watched all those years on dvd without ME, I almost cried.