Don't know what to do for her birthday party?

coasterqueen wrote: I'm feeling pretty blue right now. Don't know if it's these dern pg hormones or what, lol.

I don't know what to do for Kylie's birthday party. I was going to have a party at our house for my parents, Sis and her boyfriend, MIL, FIL, BIL (7 yrs old), SIL, BIL and their two kids (9 and 5), other BIL and SIL and her baby (3 or 4 months old), plus my grandparents. So about 17 people. BUT since my SIL and BIL and their kids are coming from Georgia to go to the ball game that same weekend they won't be able to come to a party.

So I either have to do 2 seperate parties one for DH's side and one for mine or just not have them at the party. I guess that's not a big deal, but I'm not sure.

I feel bad because Kylie has no friends because she's the only one at daycare besides a 6 year old so I have no other kids to invite. So it's not like it will be a really fun party. I feel like such an awful mother because she doesn't know any kids her age.

I can't even have games or party favors at her party because they are no kids for her to do those things with. I can't have neat parties where you have fun stuff for them to do.

She does have a cousin that is a year old who lives next door but her mother doesn't approve of our lifestyle (we buy consignment) and so she doesn't really let her dd play with Kylie. I have one close friend who has a 1 year old but she thinks Kylie is too rambunctious him and she does hurt him, so that's out.

I guess I just don't have many friends with kids and the ones that do..they live lifestyles with their children that I don't necessarily approve of so while we are friends and do things without our kids we don't with our kids. I know weird.

I'm not exactly a sociable person, I guess.

Sorry I'm just whining. I just don't know what to do for her party. I feel like I should just do nothing because she's not going to care. She wants so badly to be with kids her age but I don't know any and she scares off the ones she does try to play with.

I feel like such a horrible parent.

amynicole21 replied: Karen, don't be so hard on yourself! I still don't know what the heck I'm doing for Sophia's bday, either. At least you have started to plan! Honestly, I don't think that Sophia and Kylie will even know it's their birthday at this age. Not having other kids there won't matter. She'll probably love to have all of the attention from the adults all to herself! Don't worry, you are a great mom!!

MommyToAshley replied: Karen, don't be so hard on yourself. Ashley doesn't have many friends her age either. She plays with the little girl across the street, but her parents both work so she is in daycare most of the day and then either they are gone on weekends or we are gone on weekends. And, the beautiful Kaitlin lives close by, but we don't see her very often -- we need to change that.

I was torn what to do for Ashley's party as well, but I just decided to keep it simple. I think if you have a party with family, Kylie will love being the center of attention and the cake and ice cream wouldn't hurt either. Kylie will feel special because her parents love her so much, I don't think it will matter who else is there!

Kaitlin'smom replied:
now I feel bad....but yes we need to change that


back to the topic dont feel bad, I not even going to plan one for Kaitlin this year, since christmas is on a saturday, and her birthday is on Tuesday its just not going to work to have a gathering, so it will be just us, I kinda feel bad but also I dont think she will really remember it anyway.

I am sure she will have fun no matter what you do.

ediep replied: don't feel bad, Kylie will love the attention, cake, and presents she sill be getting!!!! and think of it this way...no goodie bags or favors makes the planning a whole lot easier

aspenblue1 replied: I know Kylie will have a great time with or without tons of other kids there.

3_call_me_mama replied: You are a great mom! Don't let a silly party make you feel bad! Have you thought about just doing something with the 3 of you that would be really special to celebrate ? (Not that I have any ideas... but if i think of some I'll let you know) That way a small family/adult party would be like a traditional way to celebrate but doing something that she would love and maybe eating out a really fun kid place and doing a littel cake there would mean more to her... and chances are a kid place will have other kids her age at it! Just a thought!

kit_kats_mom replied: Karen, really, Kylie won't be scarred at all. I only had two birthday parties my whole life (well, until I was 21 then that's different LOL). One when I was 6 with about 6 other kids and games etc and one when I was 8 with 3 friends and cake.

Most of my birthdays were spent with my mom and other family if they could come. We usually had my favorite dinner, a pathetic creation that my mom would try to pass off as a cake and she'd sing to me and give me a couple of presents.

I love looking at pictures of the cakes that my mom would make, they really were awful and are now a source of legend in our family.

I dont' feel like I missed anything. We as a society try so hard to "keep up with the Jones'" that I feel a lot of the old fun family stuff is getting lost. I plan on letting K have a couple of big parties with friends when she gets older but I guarantee you that there will not be clowns or ponies at any of them. I'm not oppoosed to them but they are just not my style. I'm more of a pin the tail on the donkey girl myself.

I'll bet that Kylie would love to see some of the adults in her family play that, or any of the other old games. She will be fine and will love having her family around doting on her.

A&A'smommy replied: Awwww Karen I don't have any ideas but I just want to say that you are NOT a horrible mother!! Sometimes I feel bad for not taking Alyssa out and taking to her to be with other babies her age I'm not real sociable either not as much as I was before I got pg. Anyway I just wanted to say that I think your a great mom you work really hard to be a good mom and I think your doing a wonderful job especially since you pumped for so long at work My idea is just invite people who love you and Kylie and have a good time! Also my SIL had a big birthday party for my nephew with a TON of children his age (when he was two) and he HATED it did not want to be around all those children SO maybe its okay to not have a lot of kids.

paradisemommy replied: ita with everyone else on this one. we didn't do anything for taven's birthday but he was under the weather anyways. he doesn't have any friends his age either but didn't even know it was his birthday. the saturday after his birthday we had our family (only 8 others) over at chuck-e-cheese and he had a BLAST. do you guys have anything like that over there? i agree with cam's mom..just take her out to somewhere fun..make it "her day" that's what i did for taven - we went to the park, went and played at macdonalds..just did whatever i knew he would love and he loved it (at least i think he did!!)

you're a GREAT mom and not depriving her of anything!!

Josie83 replied: Karen, I'm sorry that you're upset but I wouldn't be worried if I were you. Like others have said, Kylie will probbaly enjoy being the centreof attention - as long as she is with people who love her I'm sure she will have a grwat time, which is all the matters. She'll have friends in time, don't worry about it! I hope you have a great day and cheer up - you're a really good mum! In a few months Kylie will have a ready-made little friend anyway!! xx

Guest_jem0622 replied: As parents we always criticize ourselves and wonder about what we are doing right and wrong. It's a big responsibility. But I have to say she is only turning 2 and could care less herself. She loves her Mommy and Daddy. If you only sat with her and had a happy party she'd be in heaven!

I don't think you should have separate parties. Not at all. Whoever can make it then that is who shows up. Don't go breaking yourself over guests!

I can't believe your neighbor not being sociable b/c you buy consignment items. That is unreal to me. Ignorance is bliss I guess. Sorry to hear that.

If being around kids is a big deal then is there a local park where you could picnic or take her to a play place to play? I have to say though she won't know the purpose behind it. Only Mommy will.

I never had huge bdays and that was fine by me. Plus I have a summer bday so I could never really have my schoolmates around. Or have cupcakes in class. But I honestly did not care.

I would have one of her favorite foods to eat for the party and then if she is really into something (doesn't matter what) then that could be the theme for plates/etc and cake. But again she doesn't care about that either!

HUGS
Julie

coasterqueen replied: Thanks everyone. I guess it's hard for me because I had TONS of cousins to play with. Also every year for my birthday since it was close to labor day my parents took us camping and my dad's 11 brothers and sisters, their families, grandparents, my mother's brothers and sisters and grandparents all went camping and we celebrated my birthday that way. So you could imagine the HERD we had camping and I always had so many people around. Ya know?

This is just so different for Kylie because she doesn't have that like I did...all those cousins to play with. Plus I lived in town where there were a ton of kids every which way you looked. We live in the country so everyone is spaced out. Kylie can't just go next door to play at a friends house (now or ever).

I knew this would be an adjustment for me but I guess these pg hormones are making it worse, lol.

I think we are going to go ahead and have her birthday party at the baseball game since her cousins will be there. Then my side of the family can come over on her birthday if they want to celebrate. The majority of the people she LOVES are going to be at the game so it makes sense.

You all gave me some great ideas though. Ryan and I took off the day of her birthday. We were going to have cake that night, but I never thought about taking her to some of her favorite places during the day. DUH. See I'm irrational and emotional and can't think, lol.

Thanks again everyone. I guess Kylie won't ever know she doesn't have things in life that I did. It's a shame Dh and I both had that kind of environment where we had a ton of cousins at such an early age that we ALWAYS had someone to play with from when we first could remember. Kylie just won't have that and I have to accept it.

everyone.

Mailes_mommy replied: for mailes first birthday I wanted to go all out but we had just moved back home and my husband was coming in for it, hes overseas so I did a fairy theme and invited family there were no children I figured this was for her not anyone else. we had a great time she got lots of gifts and everyone there had a great time