Do you have a will?

Alice wrote: This came up in a conversation. We've talked about it before here, but not in a while.

So many new parents-to-be are so worried about the million and one details that they seem to omit this very important one: who will take care of their child(ren) in the event that something happens to them.

More important than the nursery theme or the middle name or the brand of diapers, please put some thought into who you would want bringing up your kids in case of a catastrophe. Put it in writing. It's important. Do it today.

Maddie&EthansMom replied:

Nothing to add here! I agree it is very important and yes, we have it!

My2Beauties replied: I don't have one just yet. I do have plenty of life insurance policies and my beneficiaries desginated for those, and secondary beneficiaries incase something happens to Brian and I at the same time. But you are so right Alice, I keep thinking about this and my brain is so frazzled lately that I forget. I think Brian and I will do one as soon as we get married! Thanks for the reminder

5littleladies replied: We don't have one yet, primarily because we can't come to a decision on who we would want to raise our kids if anything happened to us. It's such a hard thing to think about, but we keep talking it out.

coasterqueen replied: We have one drawn up, just haven't taken it to our lawyer yet to be proofed and set in stone.

mom21kid2dogs replied: Great idea to repost this, Alice! My husband is an attorney who works mostly in Probate & Real Estate. He's had 3 really sad cases over the years of being appointed as a Guardian Ad Litem or attorney for a party fighting over a child (or in one case, children) whose parents dies intestate. He, too, was left parentless and guardianless at age 11 when both his parents had died from cancer. He bounced around for 1.5 years among strangers and relatives before he and his sister came to live with his family.

For those of you who have had trouble "picking" a successor guardian for your child, it helps to remember that nothing is set in stone. Wills can and are changed all the time. If you pick someone and circumstances change it is easily changed. I know, we've done it.

Also, guardians need not be family. Ours are our best friend/neighbors and we are theirs as well. Sometimes, all things considered, this is a better choice. Also, it's a very good idea to check with the persons you are naming as to their willingness to serve. Just because you name a guardian for your child in your will, it doesn't mean they have to accept the responsibility.

chloe&tysmommy replied: we have one I MADE dh go with me and get one done after Chloe was born

amymom replied: Yes we have one. No money but children to care for!!

Great topic

3xsthefun replied: No, we do not have one. One reason is that we have not totally agreed who is going care for our kids. We are pretty sure who we want but we want make sure, that the person allows his family to visit with the kids. It does worry me alot if something should happen and we don't have a will. Where will our kids will go?

mysweetpeasWil&Wes replied: Not yet, but I have it on my "to do" list...I think about it every day and worry because my parents are getting much older and I wonder WHO will really take care of the kids if something happens to DH and me??

lisar replied: Yes I have a will. And yes It states in it that my life insurance goes to a specific person who would be responsible enough with the money to take care of my kids. My husband is first but if something was to happen then there is a secondary.

Lisa

Nila replied: As scary as the topic is, we decided this way before our boys were even born. We even have back ups incase something were to happen to the "original" guardians. I can not stress how important this is.

gr33n3y3z replied: We don't have one either. We do have plenty of life insurance policies and what goes where.
But we know who will take care of Katie and Erin its her older brother
But yes we have to make it legal.

3_call_me_mama replied: We have one sort of. DH has the program and has imput the info but hte whole gaurdian thing is up in the air sort of. Real conclusive huh!? We have it set that both sets of grandparents are to raise our kids together, but the childrne are to be raised in our house, meaning my inlaws would have to move here into our house and raise them with the joint decisions from my parents. But this may change cause it's not really written down yet and notorized. But our wishes have been told to both sets as well as several close friends, they are also beneficiaries on our ins policies, so it shouldn't be too big of a deal to finish up.

TeagansMom609 replied: My father is a lawyer, and I work for a law firm, darn skippy we have wills! LOL

MM'sMama replied: We sure do

SOUTHERN MOMMY replied: You know i have never thought about it until i read your post if my DH can get home i am going to make it #1 thing to do i feel so STUPID

Alice replied:
Don't!!! The subject comes up periodically, and it's one of those things that most people don't think of... that's why it's good to bring it up once or twice a year for new members. It REALLY should be in all the "What to Expect when you're Expecting" type books-- in bold letters in the beginning!!!!!

Plus, I live close to NYC and am a lot more aware of stuff like that since 9/11.

But I'm glad you're going to do it. You'll probably never need it. But it's still really important.