Dear John Letters? WDYT?

Crystalina wrote: I read that in Escambia County, Florida that sheriff officers will be sending out letters to the wives/husbands of anyone found receiving (not sure about giving) prostitution services. What do you think? I made a poll so it's easier.
I would want to know for sure. It would be nice to get a heads up on any critters being brought home.

moped replied: Gosh I don't know - sounds like it could interesting, let me think on this one!

BAC'sMom replied: Sure why not. I think the list should be posted in the local paper or on a website.

DVFlyer replied: If prostitution is illegal in that area (is it legal anywhere?) the offenders should be punished. I'm not sure, though, that it should be legal to notify other parties not directly involved... except in the case of a minor.

i.e. Morality aside, if the husband or wife gets a traffic ticket, should they send a letter to the spouse telling them?

Now if the spouse happens to open an odd letter addressed to their spouse, that's a different story.

cameragirl21 replied: I put not sure. In principle, I imagine the spouse would want to know but then again, I'm sure the spouse would want to know if her/his spouse was cheating in principle so how far do you intend to police things?
I don't like the idea of letters being sent in principle, it's an invasion of privacy, not so much for the prostitutionbut for anything that might come afterward. Once you start this sort of law it branches out to other things.
As for prostitution, it's legal in Nevada. I am no fan of it but don't think it should be illegal. It is, afterall, the oldest profession in the book. Imo, too many women do this sort of thing for free so if they want to get paid for it, so be it.
I've always been quite fascinated with courtesans, btw, and firmly believe I was one in a past life.

mckayleesmom replied: Yes...I think they should be sent. A wife or husband should have the right to know if they are in danger of contracting diseases.

A&A'smommy replied: yes I think they should and I say that because I would want to know if my husband was cheating on me PERIOD and i think that all spouses should be told what kind of marriage they are in.

my2monkeyboys replied: Yes, I would want to know, but NO I would not want the gov't telling me. It's not their business. If it's illegal where it happens then the spouse will find out anyway, if it's not illegal than it's up the spouse to find out the old-fashioned way as with every other affair.

redchief replied: I read CAD entries often and I know how often one person gets confused with another. Holley can tell you that it is quite common. I'd be worried that the system would let some of those mistakes go through. Like DV said, are they sharing traffic violations with the significant others? Then they shouldn't do this either. On the other hand, perhaps they could arrest the johns as well as the prostitutes and have mandatory court appearances. I think that would be difficult to hide from the dear wife. I know they do that for public urination, and I don't think a drunk peeing on the lawn is anywhere near as socially degrading as a married man hooking up with a... well, hooker.

Boys r us replied: Yeah I would want to know!! and as far as 'privacy' is concerned..that's out the window when you commit a crime. I our smaller little local town paper, all arrests are published. It only comes out every wednesday and there is a column on the 2nd page with a list of all arrests over the last week. I love reading them!! LOL

TheOaf66 replied:


I agree with this. If the PD is gonna have access to these letters, what is to stop any of them from using them as a blackmail thing or selling them to tabloids etc.

Say for example there is a letter made to me and then they do their yearly calls asking donations for the police ball or whatever and when I say I am not interested they say well I would hate to send this letter to your wife.

If the spouse is using these services odds have it they will slip up and get caught anyways. The last thing we need is more government regulation and interference.

Don't get me wrong, I don't think it is right to use the services but I think just arresting the guy is good enough, not getting the mail involved...as many times as my neighbor has gotten my mail, I can just imagine that exchange.

moped replied:
Yes I thought about this overnight and decided that I don't think it should.

jcc64 replied: I think it's a health issue, and for that reason alone, yes, I think the spouse has a right to know. For instance, what if the dh is cheating, contracts AIDS, sleeps with the wife, who is bf a baby??

My2Beauties replied: I'm on the fence, at first I answered yes and then when I read Ed's response it made me re-think it because I didn't realize there were that many cases of mistaken identity, I would be SUPER PO'd if my DH got a letter in the mail on something I didn't do and vice versa.

Celestrina replied:
ITA. Why shouldn't the johns be prosecuted?

It would be just as easy for the one cheating to intercept the letter. Not to mention what if it was accidentally sent to the wrong house? Would you want your neighbor opening it by mistake?

DVFlyer replied: For me, this is a black and white case. There is no legal basis (that I can think of ) to tell the spouse. And, in fact, notifying the significant other can do as much (or more) harm than the actual cheating.

The disease reason is sketchy at best. While that reason could be argued morally, there is no legal basis for it. My limited knowledge of that "profession" is that regular health check-ups are standard practice, which means an S/O would have as much of a chance of picking something up from a person they met in a bar who doesn't get tested regularly.

But as I mentioned, when someone's wife or husband sees a note in the mail from the Attorney General, they'll know something's up.

Boo&BugsMom replied:
I completely agree. Once you do something that dispicable I don't care about your "privacy" anymore!

Calimama replied:
I agree.

holley79 replied: I live in Escambia Co and work in Santa Rosa. I think it's a great idea. Just think of all the "paid sex' that will get cut back on. My sister does sting operations and looks like a total "crack whore" and you would not believe the Johns she gets. It's insane and I'm not talking they are nasty guys "picking" her up they are business men who are picked up and I think their wives/ husbands need to know they are not safe. They could be bringing home disease to their spouses. Why should they be subjected to something life threatening because their spouse can't keep it in their pants. JMO

I sent out notices for Misd offenses all the time. They could get a post card starting they have a court date and the offense on it. Innocent enough, right? One that same token I could easily go to court without DH knowing. Court is during work hours and I could just take an extended lunch for all anyone knows. It doesn't make the papers because it's a Misd. Also most of the johns being arrested are during a sting. They are popping prostitutes as well. Trust me after seeing them I know I could make a killing as fat as I am. LOOL

wcs40110 replied: The guys could just as easily hide the letters if they know they are being sent out too....