Children on the Spectrum

DVFlyer wrote: Not so much a question, but a chance for dialog on this subject.

Keian just turned 3 in April and doesn't really talk. When he does, it's not like a specific "dadda" while he's looking at me or "mamma" when he's looking at Michelle. If we prompt him like, "Say cocoa please", he'll say "coco peeeeeze", so he can do it, but he should be further along at this point.

If we put a movie on that he's seen 500 times, he happily "talks" along with the movie. The latest one was while watching Casper. When one of the characters saw Casper and yelled, "A ghhooooossst", Keian jabbered right along and even had the little vibrato while saying, "ghoooooooossst". It was pretty darn cute.

We had at-home therapy for about 6 months. Can't say I really saw much improvement, but the therapy was definitely not doing any harm so we liked it. It ended when he turned three (their rules) but we may get an exception so they can continue it until he's 5.

Their has been talk about Autism, but he seems like he's on the outer fringe of that but is still considered on the "Spectrum". He's been seen by hearing, speech, and psychological Dr's and there is no consensus.

Anyone else dealt with this?

mckayleesmom replied: Sorry he is having such a hard time.


Honestly...before I even read down far enough to see you mention it..the first thing that clicked in my head was MAYBE HE IS AUTISTIC.

Maybe he is just a selective talker too.

lisar replied: Raygen was a little behind in alot of things because she was so premature. But not like that. So I am sorry you are having to deal with this and cant get the answers you are looking for.

Maddie&EthansMom replied: I'm sorry they can't give you more answers now. Is this always the way it is? They can't really tell until the child enters school? I know with dyslexia it is this way, obviously b/c they can't read until a certain age. But with autism there are certain behaviors associated with it as well as a learning disability. Since you said he seems to be "on the fringe" maybe they want to wait until he matures a bit.

DVFlyer replied: It's tough but we feel things could be *much* worse. He's "normal" in the physical sense. i.e. stacking, playing, walking, running etc. It's just the vocal part.

Autism is such a broad term. There are varying degrees. If a boy spins his toy car tires, that's a sign of Autism.... but it's also normal. If they don't look at you in the eyes, that's a sign of Autism, but it's also something kids do. If they line up their toys, that's a sign, but "every kid does that".

It's tough because since he can't talk, it's hard to communicate which frustrates him, but as I mentioned, it could be a lot worse.

After reading the story about the member who found the kid on the street and asked what color their house was, it started me thinking..... Keian would never be able to do that. Of course I don't plan on letting him escape like that, but let's be honest, it *could* happen.

DVFlyer replied:
Thanks Aimee,

It's actually the opposite. They are worried that since he isn't talking right now, it will be harder the older he gets.

One psychologist described it like this- if I interpreted Michelle's description correctly:

By 2 or 3, a child has already built their "box". i.e. Thinking outside the "box" means "one's personal beliefs etc". Once that box has been built it's hard to reconstruct or reform it to something else. Think of the times a problem was obvious after you realized the answer. This is because your "box" was preventing you from seeing it. (could be way off on this, so take it for what it's worth)

Hopefully, he's just "late". He seems to be talking more but it's no where near where Chloe was at this point.

mommy~to~a~bunch replied: I am so sorry that you guys can't get a straight answer. This link might have good info on it to help deal with the professionals. I know opinions can vary widely through each specialty, but that's no excuse for waiting and leaving you guys hanging.

Crystalina replied: I don't know much about Autism but it does seem to me that it's quickly given out as a label to some kids. My sister has a set of twin boys. They are now 5 and one just started talking at the begining of his 5th year. I mean there was pretty much nothing up to that point. His brother did a lot of talking for him but now he talks. He's still quiet and it takes awhile for him to start talking but he does. Maybe you just don't have much of a talker?

Hopefully that's all it is.

::ETA:: They tried to label him as autistic and my sister started thinking he was but he showed no other signs. His ped said he was fine, just quiet. That seemed to be it.

DVFlyer replied:
Thanks for the link. Been to that site before.

I'm not sure the professionals are leaving us hanging as much as they just don't know. And if that's the case, they should really hold off labeling a child with anything.

I think Autism will be one of those things that in 10 years they will still not know what causes it, but will have a better understanding of it. But does that really help anyone?

DVFlyer replied:

He has shown some signs, but one Dr. says it's a sign of Autism and another says, "Oh, all kids line up their cars like that".

My mom, who is a nurse and has seen her share of Autistic children, does not think he is Autistic.

jcc64 replied: If autism is a possibility for your son, you need to aggressively pursue consistent, high-quality treatment. Therapy at his age can make a HUGE difference, however mild his disability may or may not be. Even if it's not autism, it is a significant speech delay, and that alone entitles him to services.
The reason therapy was discontinued at age 3 is b/c early intervention is only funded up to that point, after which it becomes the responsibility of the school district in which you reside, despite the fact that he is not yet of school age. They are responsible for providing and/or paying for services if he is deemed eligible. It certainly sounds like he qualifies for services based on your description.
I would call the nurse/school psychiatrist/even the principal of your local elementary school and get the ball rolling. First step would be a comprehensive evaluation. You are entitled access to any and all evaluations regarding your child's evaluations.
Don't be passive. This is a federally protected right, but schools count on people not knowing their rights. Services don't come cheap, kwim?
Best of luck, and kup!

MommyToAshley replied:
I was going to say the exact same thing. I would start with the school system. Most schools also have a specially funded preschool program that coincides with the therapy.

I know that most poeple think of the most extreme cases when they hear the word autism, but as you said yourself, there is a broad spectrum. There are a ton of audio processing disorders, some very mild. But, as Jeanne said, early intervention is the key. I have a good friend that her son has a mild audio processing disorder and his preschool teacher was quick to pick up on the signs. She got therapy for her son very early on, and I believe that is why he is so successful in school now. It may just be that he's not ready to talk yet, but getting help now won't hurt anything... it can only help.

bawoodsmall replied: I just want to ask if it is possible that he is just lazy in the speech area? Aiden has to be prompted most of the time(he just turned 2.) He will just try to say juice when he wants it. I make him say mommy i want some juice please. He also has some oddities that I have a tendency to worry about( if I am in his face a lot of the time he will not look me in the eye, and he never wanted to be held close as a baby. I am praying he is just my little odd fier ball. As far as the boy girl comparison....dont go there. Trust me! My ped always said you will kill yourself if you try to compare them. Emily talked like you and me at 2. I would continue with the speech therapy and try to get some diagnosis. If it does turn out to be autism it seems the earlier you know the better. KUP! You and your wife are in my thoughts.

DVFlyer replied: We have begun the steps to further the therapy through the school system. Luckily we have a supervisor who likes Michelle so he is working hard to get us another two years of therapy.

If he doesn't make something happen soon, I'll get involved. I have very little problem getting people to listen to me when I want to.

Thanks for the tips on the school system. I'm pretty sure he's been evaluated by them recently. Time will tell if they think he's bad enough for therapy.

DVFlyer replied:
Yup. Totally possible. And I lean more toward lazy than anything else. We make him say "thank you" "please" etc. But he won't do it unless we prompt him

He must have got his laziness from his father....

jcc64 replied: I believe the threshold for a language delay is 25%- how they arrive at that figure I don't know, but I would say that he should qualify for something.
My son had a speech delay that was obvious to me from the outset. He spoke, incessantly, but he had an articulation problem- no one could understand a word he said, including me. He also used to put things in a very strange order. They tested him for a processing issue, and decided that it was simply an oral motor thing. However, I was able to get him services through the school district. I had to fight, but I got them. Now he's 12, and he's fine.
Best of luck!

coasterqueen replied: It is my understanding from all the reading I've done that Sensory issues are considered "on the spectrum". I've asked Megan's therapist about this and she doesn't like to put autism and sensory issues in the same sentence - for fear of what parents minds will wander to.

Megan took a LOT longer to speak than her sister did. She took a lot longer to do everything. She definitely started speaking before 3, but not much. It was maybe 2.25 or 2.5 when she really started to speak a bit more and now she's a motor mouth. Of course we've been in occupational therapy for awhile, too. When we first started therapy she barely spoke and now she's talking a lot.

I wonder if he could have some sensory issues that is causing his delay. I can't remember if you said in your OP if you took him to an OT or not ??

julesmom replied: I had my son evaluated at 6yrs of age by a neuropsychologist. I was so sure he was "on the spectrum". I had even mentioned it to his speech therapist when he was 4.

The neuropsych came back saying he's dyslexic and some other things like dyslexia with math and writing. I said, "You mean he's NOT autistic??!!"
The doc said, "NO". I was so surprised.

We also found out he has CAPD which is central auditory processing disorder.
That paired with dylexia were causing him ALOT of problems. But he's in 2nd grade now and getting all the right help and is doing wonderfully. You would never think anything is wrong with this kid!

jcc64 replied: See, proves my point about finding the right help early! Glad it all worked out for you!

Boo&BugsMom replied: Has anyone suggested Selective Mutism? There are a number of possibilities, not just autism, and it could be something much less severe. Although autism seem to be coming out of the woodwork, I think too many people these days jump on it too quickly like they do ith ADD/ADHD, IMO. I agree, the school systems will be your best bet at this point.

My2Beauties replied: Sorry you're having to deal with these things. My friend's son who is 5 now really just started talking when he was around 4, since then he doesn't stop, but he's very hard to understand. I've always thought he may be on the spectrum but he shows no other signs and the docs say he is fine, his speech will continue to improve. So many docs say so many different things, I hope you find out what is going on, and early intervention is key as Jeanne and others have said. Best of luck annd KUP!

bawoodsmall replied:
Hey Karen. I was just wondering what you mean by barely spoke and now speaks a lot. My Aiden doesnt speak anywhere near what Emily did but I dont know how "normal" he is. All I really know is his behavior appears odd to me but noone else(daycare) seems to think anything is odd. I always ask how they think he is doing and they say fine but then I am like are they just saying that? I honestly did wonder when he was younger if he was autistic because he would never let me rock him and be close(I now wonder if it was because he had reflux) His temper is out of control at times and if I ask him what he wants he cant tell me or is just so ticked he then doesnt know what he wants. This may sound normal to everyone else and maybe it is, I guess that is why I am asking. The talking he will do but a lot of things he doesnt say right and you have to sometimes prompt him to answer you.

Sorry I just wrote a book -as some of you know I worry like crazy about him because he is so different from Emily and she is all I know to compare with.

DVFlyer replied:
Yes, Keian "speaks" quite a bit. It's just babbling. I'm sure HE knows what he's saying, but we sure don't.

punkeemunkee'smom replied: Please don't worry too much yet or allow him to be labeled just so that they have a name to give it -KWIM? My younger brother was much the same. He pointed to things to get them-all of us jumped to help him the kid had us pegged When he was over 3 he walked into the kitchen and said 'MOM can you make pancakes this morning? I think I want them instead of eggs' My mom almost passed out He obviously could speak and had just been waiting until it was something he really wanted to say. He is still an observer and usually when he decides to join in on a conversation he has the most insightful and intelligent prospective

jem0622 replied: It could be an articulation (aka 'artic') and not an Austism Spectrum Disorder. He may need more time with a speech therapist.

His speech is much like my friend's son, and he is older than my girls. You can understand everything that my girls say. You cannot understand her son. He is in therapy for it, and he qualifies for head start too.

ITA that you need to be proactive now. Do not wait. That is the biggest mistake, and you are hearing that through affirmation.

HUGS