WWYD?

My3LilMonkeys wrote: I kind of have a problem with one of my SIL's friends that I'm not sure what to do about. We both spend a lot of time on the weekends at my MILs house so we are around each other quite a bit.

Friend had a hysterectomy about a month ago and is under Dr's orders not to lift anything for 2 more weeks. She has a 5 month old baby and so needs quite a bit of help with her. Not a problem - we all love babies and more than happy to help.

My problem is she doesn't seem to like me holding the baby. When I do she gives me funny looks or comes up with a reason for me to put her down after a few minutes. Yesterday the friend was outside for a little while and came back in to find me holding her baby (she started crying, so I picked her up). She waited until I walked into the kitchen with her and asked my SIL "Why is she holding her? Why didn't you pick her up instead?" (SIL told me about it later).

I'm not really sure what to do about it - and TBH, I'm a little curious as to why she doesn't like me holding her but doesn't mind anyone else doing it. Should I confront her? Stop playing with the baby? Or just let it go if she doesn't say anything?

If you made it all the way to the end, congrats - I think I got a little long winded here.

PrairieMom replied: Do you wear strong perfume or smoke or something? It bothers me when people that do hold my baby becuase they always come back to me smelling like that. thats the only thing I can think of.
I would ask someone who is closer to her to talk to her and find out what the issue is and then report back to me. I would have a hard time confrinting the person myself.

Lynda836 replied: I would ask your SIL to find out for you. If the friend wait to say stuff like that behind your back instead of to you...she'll probably deny anything's wrong if you confront her. Did you get along before she had the baby?

My3LilMonkeys replied:

We've never been great friends, but we can have a polite conversation - even now we will sit and talk about our older kids (she has a boy 2 months vounger than Brooke) without a problem. Actually, she is even okay with me playing with or helping out with her son - it's just the baby.

Lynda836 replied: That is really wierd....something seems to be up her butt. I'd definitely get the SIL to look into into for you.

C&K*s Mommie replied: I say go straight to the horse's mouth, and ask her, yourself. I may be shy in some respects, but I would much rather know the truth firsthand then through a roundabout manner.

MommyToAshley replied:
me too.

ions_momma replied:

redchief replied:
Ask her yourself. Her problem is with you personally. If you don't know what it is, you at least have a right to know what's up. Whether you and she can reconcile will depend upon what the issues are I would suppose. Good luck.

Nina J replied: I would ask her yourself

gr33n3y3z replied: I say go straight to the horse's mouth but dont expect a answer

I bet it was very simular to what I went through
When Rick was just 4 months old I had a tubal pregnancy and had major surgery and I was not allowed to lift him for 4 weeks so that means everyone was taking care of him but me it made me feel But it was ok if Ed,his Mom or Dad or my Mom and Dad was taking care of him anyone else that tried to help I got very upset with bc they were doing something that I should have been doing.

Good Luck

redchief replied:
Oh yea... I forgot about that. I also remember not being very sensitive to your feelings. I just didn't understand at the time. Boy was I a dummy back then.

ZandersMama replied: i think she is afraid that her baby will like you more then her

holley79 replied:
Aw Lisa I can't even imagine.

Ed, that's sweet for you to own up to it. I think you are both the sweetest couple.


I'm with everyone else, go to the horse's mouth. But like Lisa said don't expect an answer.

Jackie012007 replied: that is really bizarre and that would bother me too! I would ask your SIL to approach her about it first, because you are most likely going to get an honest answer... if you ask yourself, unless this woman really has a problem with you and is up front like that, she won't tell you the truth. Personally, that would really offend me and I wouldn't want to pick up her baby anyways (hormones? I'm sensitive!) OOh and tell us what you find out because I'm wondering what is up her butt! you poor thing!

ashtonsmama replied: That's wierd, IMHO. Sorry, no advice, maybe just ask the mom?