This is really bothering me... - Just a vent

lesliesmom wrote: At first I kind of laughed it off but the more I sit and think about it the more it's bothering me. Here's what happened.

I get to our daycare this morning and our DCP says she needs to talk to me. She sends my kids off and keeps her kids upstairs until we're done. I'm thinking great, what did my kids do, right? Well, no. Our kids are in the same school. I guess yesterday some one overheard other mothers talking (not very quietly or nicely from what she said) about the jacket I've been wearing. It's an older jacket and not in the best condition but it does the trick. I know it's not the best but the $$ is not in the budget to replace it so I make do with what I have (as does DH) to make sure that our kids have a home, food, clothes, coat and can go to school (this is a private school). Why am I letting these other mothers (and I can speculate who some of them are) get to me?!? Then I start thinking.. if these mothers are saying this in school, are the kids hearing it? What does my daughter think? It's a coat. Do people have nothing better to do than "gossip" about a stupid jacket?!?!

Thanks for reading. I'm sorry, but as I said, the more I sit here the more I'm bothered by this and I just don't know why I'm letting it get to me. It makes me feel like I'm back in school.

PrairieMom replied: I totally get where you are coming from. Things like that get to me too. I really find my self worrying about what the other parents will think of me, and my kid is just in preschool!

At my MOPS meeting last week we had a speaker talk to us about finances. He said that the number one problem we have today is that we are spending money we don't have to buy things we don't need to impress people we don't know.
that really hit home for me and has been my mantra for the past few days.

Boo&BugsMom replied: Some people just have too much time on their hands. Sounds immature and completely out of line. I'm just baffled how some people just never grow up. What's even more sad is that it's in a private school (a Christian school I'm assuming? correct me if I'm wrong), a place where you are suppose to model Christ...doesn't seem very "Chirst-like" to me.

holley79 replied: People have nothing better to do with their time. They don't care about other's feelings at all. I remember growing up my mom wore my brother's hand me down shoes because she did with out to make sure we didn't. If people can't understand that, then it's their problem.

Calimama replied: Those mothers need to get a life.

lovemy2 replied: Ask them to see their checkbooks and credit card statements - they probably don't sleep at nite cause they are in over their heads with their new coats, etc. - it hard I know to let it go but try - you are the only person you have to answer to

jcc64 replied: So, the reason the dcp told you this was???
She did you a favor, hon. Now you know exactly who the shallow, judgmental and unforgiving harpies are in the schoolyard, and you can steer clear of them. Hold your head high- you're being economically responsible and you have your priorities straight- unlike the vast majority of Americans drowning in their own debt.

A&A'smommy replied:
ITA!!!!!

and its mean and immature that they are sitting around talking about your jacket.. aren't there better things they can talk about???

MommyToAshley replied:
I completely agree. Well said.

luvmykids replied: I'm sorry Some girls never do grow out of the catty comparisons, do they You're doing right by your family and should pat yourself on the back. And if it makes you feel any better, the coat I wear most days is about five years old I look at them as an investment, not something I replace with every trend.

Destined_4_3 replied: How awful of them? it's not their place to judge you or your situation! unless they're sitting in a fully paid off house with no debt and plenty of cash, it's not their business. I thought this was going to lead to them talking about something of substance, not just silly gossip!

lisar replied: Its none of thier business what you want to wear. Heck I have some clothes that are old and nasty but you know what some of them are the most comfortable things I own. And I wont get rid of them. Dont let it bother you. My modo in life is: I dont care what other people think of me. If they dont like me then so be it. If they dont like the way I look then dont look. I dont care.

gr33n3y3z replied: some of my best clothes look like they could use the trash including almost all of my sweatshirts
Let them mean girls look like idiots and start trouble its no ones business but your own

TheOaf66 replied: that is just nice, I guess if they saw me running around in my heavy flannel that I use as a coat I would be totally talked about. Oh well I would just forget about it and not let it get to you

bawoodsmall replied: People are rude. I think it is rude the dcp told you also though. She knew it would hurt your feelings. Sometimes you just cant afford it. Try not to let it get to you. I work at a fancy club and trust me just because people pretend like they have money doesnt mean they do.

kimberley replied: as always, i totally agree with Jeanne. try not to let it get to you.

i had a similar incident with a teacher. jade was a baby, so i was insanely sleep deprived. they called a meeting at like 8:30am and well, i had spit up on my jacket from burping the baby as i ran out the door, my outfit was clean but not the most stylish, my hair was not perfectly coifed due to snow, and i looked tired (duh). i was questioned a week later by the principal about it, told the church could help if i was in need and asked if i needed help. i was like WTF?!
if ignorant people need to put me beneath them and make completely inaccurate assumptions about me, let em. i do right by my kids and it sounds like you do to, so forget them.

My3LilMonkeys replied:
Exactly.


sorry they were so mean

redchief replied: I never got this whole "It's a year out of style" nonsense anyway. So what? We should scrap all of the things we have because of a date on a label? I'm so glad guys aren't like this (are they?).

BTW, Jeanne, I haven't heard or read the most appropriate term "harpies" in many years. Thanks for the smile and more than adept description.

My2Beauties replied: I don't understand how people can be so insensitive and judgmental of others. HOw would they feel if the tables were turned or worse the day their kid comes home and says someone made fun of the outfit they had on..boy they won't like stuff like that then will they When will people grow up?

MoonMama replied:
as well.

Jackie012007 replied: god, how ridiculous. I work at a daycare in a rich community and I get looks all the time when I am asked where I live and I say "east Utica" - people from Marcy think that all of utica is a scum-hole and where I live, it's definitely not. Its sad that some people can be so catty - I'm sorry you are dealing with that.

I dress in the same 5 shirts every week because its not worth buying nice clothing when every day it's a possibility to get puked, peed or pooped on!! I got them on clearance at Old Navy for $3 a piece - there is NOTHING wrong with being thrifty, especially when you are using the extra money to put your kids in a good school! Don't let the B&%$#es get to you!

moped replied: Brutal!

Sorry about that........