Please help were trying so hard - Trying to have our first

Jo wrote: Please can anyone fill me with hope and good news, possible tips and advice.

Me and my long term partner are trying to have our first baby but things are proving a little hard.

I have been on the pill for 7 years and only recentally come off it. I'm 24 and he is 25.

I would like some sucess stories as everywhere else i have only heard bad reports and so on.

Please so us that there is a light at the end of the tunnel

Thanks

Jo

Anything please halp Littlejojames@hotmail.com

Jamison'smama replied: Well this board is full of success stories. Any reason to think you will have problems? Some of us had fertility issues and some not so we have all kinds of advice whenever you need it. There are lots of websites and books out there that can help you chart your cycles to get the best possible chance each month. I'm sure someone will post them --I'm not sure which are best.

Good luck to you and welcome to the board!

Jo replied: Thanks for the reply and your little girl is lovely

There is no meidcal reason why we cant just everyone which i have spoke to in rooms like this (not this one) have always gone on about because i have been on the pill so long people have been telling me its taken them nearly a year and that they had loads of complications!

Elle replied: If you've recently started trying, then it's normal that you didn't get it immediately. If you've been trying for more than a year and still didn't get pregnant, then you should go to the doctor.
I know many people who had trouble to get pregnant, and finally got what they wanted. So good luck, don't stress too much (because stress is bad when you're trying) and there is surely a light at the end of the tunnel.

jcc64 replied: Well, first off, welcome to the board. I know once you make the decision to have a baby, the waiting can seem endless. But despite what we were taught in health class, conceiving a baby is harder than you would think. There are only a few opportunities each month, and there are so many random factors that could interfere with conception. I'm not saying this to discourage you- just to remind you that it can take time, sometimes lots of time, even if nothing is anatomically wrong with either one of you. Your age is definitely working in your favor. I'm not sure how long it's been since you've been off the pill, but it can take a little while for your cycles to right themselves. Finally, getting really anxious about it is a very real impediment to fertility. Try to put it in the background for awhile. Just enjoy each other's company- there'll come a day when being alone with each other will be a rarity. Relax and enjoy yourselves sexually, I can't tell you how many friends I have who felt just like you do, and always seemed to get pg when they were "taking a break." I'm assuming you've visited an ob/gyn for a pre--conception check up? Anyway, good luck, I'm sure things will work out for you eventually.

coasterqueen replied:
Hi Jo. I'm 29 (going to be 28, lol, here soon). I had my DD September 2002. Before getting pg with her I had been on the birth control pill since I was 13 years old, so that's about 14 years of being on the pill, give or take. I was on the pill for a medical reason, that's why I was on it so early, lol.

Anyways, I stopped taking the pill in September of 2001 by direction of my OB/GYN. She said I should be off the pill for 2 months before actually ttc. We ttc in late November 2001 and got pg right away.

Sooooooo, even though you may not have gotten pg yet, it IS possible. My OB/GYN did tell me it could take up to a year to get pg because of being on the pill for so long.

So give it some time, it will happen

Jo replied: I would like to say thank you to all who have replyed.

This must be one of the nicest places i have been in to talk about things like this.

Its nice to know that there are people out there who have been through things like us and that they have come out of it with the precious thing which were after.

Thank you all so much

MommyToAshley replied: Hello and Welcome!

I have to agree with jcc64, I know a lot of people that conceived after they stopped "trying" so hard. I think all of the emotional stress does something to your cycle and makes it harder to conceive. Once you relax, it may just happen. Don't give up hope and just have fun.

I am looking forward to getting to know you, be sure to keep us updated on how you are doing!

paradisemommy replied: Hi Jo! I am 32 and had my first ds in July 2002. Prior to that, I had been on the pill since I was about 16. I went off it for 3 months to clear everything out and get things back to normal and got pg right away. I, too, was afraid that being on the pill for so long would be harmful to my body. My ob/gyn had nothing but good things to say about being on the pill and how it actually helps your body more than anything. SO - there is a huge light at the end of the tunnel. ITA with everyone else. You just need to relax and let things take it's course. I think the more you want it, the harder it is for it to happen.

Good luck and I'm sure some of the other gals here can give you some great pointers!!

Heather replied: Hi there and welcome!! I agree, if you just came off the pill it might take a little longer to conceive, get your body a chance to catch up. The first thing you need to consider is relaxation!! I am a true believer of NOT trying so hard to try. We are the success of that. I tried for several months to get pregnant with this baby and the month we "stopped trying" we were pregnant. Like the other ladies have said...Just relax and have fun...afterall isn't that what it is all about Stop trying so hard

Good luck and lots of baby dust coming your way!!

****BABYDUST****

Littlejojames replied: Hello everyone its Jo.

As you were all so nice and made me feel like what were (me and my partner) are doing is not just going to lead to heartache and problems i have decided to join the site.

When i went home and told my partner about all the stories and the way you have all been so nice he gave me a big hug and told me that everything was going to be ok, which i think was what i needed after the stress which the other not so helpful sites gave me.

So i would like to say thank you from my partner in giving us that hope back!

paradisemommy replied: AWESOME!!! So glad you decided to join our little (well getting bigger) happy family!! Lots of awesome people here!! I look forward to getting to know you and your s/o better!!

Littlejojames replied: How did it feel when you became pregnant after being on the pill for so long?

Craig (my partner) is being so supportive, we had his niece last night (just turned 1) which made us a little more broody.

Think that its harder trying to keep it to ourselfs that we are trying as his familyare always saying that we are the perfect couple and that having a baby will be the best thing ever where as mine are more towards us getting our life and careers going and having children later in life.

We had a false alarm in March and when we found out i wasnt we were so down for a few weeks that he went out and got me 2 baby fish (bubble and squeek) to make me smile (got a dog when we had out first ever false alarm) called Snoop (staff dog) If this keeps up we will be moving to a fram.

paradisemommy replied: for me it was bittersweet..i had wanted to have a baby since i was about 21..just kept looking for the right guy who would make a good father. i wasn't *trying* tc but i wasn't doing much to prevent it either and was totally excited when i found out i was. i had, for the most part, the best pg ever - didn't have any morning sickness, no nauseousness, but my face broke out really bad (acne) which was a sign that i was having a boy (so i was told) and sure enough!!

i did the dog in my bad marriage and got too attached - i had to give him up when i split with him because he was just too big. our house is sooooo tiny that i didn't want to deal with a baby and pets.

hang in there - it will happen when you least expect it!!

momof2girls replied:

I did not see how long you have been trying.
The first time it took us almost 2.5 years... no medical reason why I wanted to be a mommy so bad in some ways Im glad it took me a lil longer because I know just how much of a miracle it is.
After my daughter was 3 we started trying again after 3 years I just gave up and said I have one daughter Im blessed and I will just be thankful for that.
7 years later I went to the Dr because I thought I had the flu and I was PREGO!
I now have my new baby girl that is almost 8 months.
The best advice I can give you is pretend your not trying and just let it happen.
Good Luck!

MommyToAshley replied:
LOL! That's funny! Glad to see you all still have your sense of humor in all of this, that's important!

Sounds like you and Craig have a wonderful relationship, hang in there... it'll happen!

Sending some more baby dust your way!

lsjulee replied: After my first miscarriage 10+ years back, I have problem conceiving. Don't know was it due to the hormone changed or what. Cos I have polycysts ovaries after the miscarriage. This made my cycle goes haywire too. It took me 5 years..... 5 long years to conceive. I was at the verge of having to go thru the IVF program even. But fortunately, my ovaries worked before I'd to pen my approval on the program. Wow you don't know how much a bomb IVF program cost here.

I was prescribed Clomid pills which is actually a fertility pill for women. I don't know how easily available is this pill over there. For my two kids, they were clomid aided. And I'll have to take the pills again, if I ever want a third one..... and this has been shelved...... for the time being. Else, the plus side for me is I don't have to go thru any birth control program nor having to take any precaution. I always tell Sean, if I really ever got pregnant without the pills, then this baby is really a lottery.

Littlejojames replied: Got back last night and craig has got me some Sea Monkeys. They look like mini Fleas.

When we eventually do have a baby we might not have the room for it! We have to see the funny side i think if we dont we will be going mad at each other.

Feeling very down today, having problems down below with un-controlled bleeding. Just got into work and decided that i need to go home and spend the day with craig. Making an appointment with the doctor and having a long weekend off (relax and rest)

Love craig loads he is the most wonderful man and very supportive

Littlejojames replied: Got so many questions i dont know where to start.

How long is it before you can tell that your pregnant?
How many days do you have to wait till it shows up on a home test? or is it able to pick up the day after?