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Not sure how to handle this one.


MoonMama wrote: My little sister Malina who is 16 as most of you know is living with us 98% of the time so she can attend a performing arts school. Anyway she has become great friends with a girl named Isabella who is also 16, who attends the school too. They have been hanging out any chance they get and she is such a sweetheart. Malina asked if she (Isabella) could stay the night here this weekend (tonight) and I said yes that was fine (and it is). But I said I needed to meet her parents and to know that is was ok with them as well since I have yet to meet them. Ok know biggie she said they were fine with everything and would meet DH and I tonight when they dropped her off. All was fine and they seem like such sweet and wonderful people. But then I was shocked when they thanked me for having her over, because she never gets out or gets a brake from her daughter. huh.gif It turns out this 16 yr old has a 3 yr old daughter (she got pregnant on her 13th birthday or so I'm told). ohmy.gif Now don't get me wrong I am not trying to judge her by any means, and from I get from her parents she has really stepped up and its doing a great job as a parent. but I am pretty taken aback by this. And I have to admit I have a bit of mixed feeling over it. Part of me wants my sister to be extremely careful and another part feels so for this girl. I can't even imagine. I told me sister just to use her good judgement, that I'm proud of her for befriending this girl (most others have not), and that I am here if need be. They are doing great by the way haven't had an issue all night and she is very polite and sweet. Guys did I say the right things? What would your feelings be? I guess I am just pretty shocked. sleep.gif

Hillbilly Housewife replied: I don't know what to say..... i feel for the girl. sleep.gif hug.gif

ZandersMama replied: Poor little girl sad.gif
I would say that since you had no problems with her before, this shouldnt change things. She made one bad decision when she was 13, we all do, only hers got her into alot of trouble. And it seems she has taken responsibility for her little girl, where alot of 13 year olds wouldnt. I would wonder how at 13 she knew what to do to get pregnant blink.gif It scares me how early things are starting now. She has a long road ahead of her, good for your sister for befriending the girl.

youngmomofone replied: It would not change my opinion about her. She is still a young girl who is in the hardest (imo) time of her life trying to go to school and help raise her baby, so she needs friends like your sister. smile.gif

my2monkeyboys replied: I agree with all of the above. I would actually think that since the other girl is being a responsible parent as much as she can, it will probably be a good example to your sister on just how tough having a child can be. Nothing like seeing real life to diminish the glorified idea of parent hood that the younger generation has now-a-days.
I think it's great that your sister has befriended her, and although I would be curious as to how it all happened at such a young age, I certainly wouldn't hold it against her.

mckayleesmom replied: It wouldn't change my opinion of her. People are not perfect. When I find myself sometimes judging these girls....I stop and think to myself....That girl could have been me. I wasn't haveing sex at 13, but I was at 16....

luvbug00 replied: I had a friend who had her first at that age adn she is a wonderful mom! wub.gif she now has 3 others. I say there is no point worrying about her past becuase she is heading in the right direction for her future thumb.gif

TrulyBlessed replied: I would be shocked too. I think you handled it well. You never know, she could have been raped with she was 13 and has not shared that information, which she shouldn't have to, but it sounds like she has a great support system and it doing a good job.

MoonMama replied: Ok first off let me start by saying this did not change my opinion of her by any means. I still think she is a sweetheart and I think its wonderful that she is stepping up and being such a great mother. I just feel for her. I can't help but think when she is my age (23) she is going to have a 10 yr old. That has got to be hard. I am very proud of my sister for befriending her. I didn't mean to come off that I had an issue with her by any means. I was just shocked and felt for her big time.

She brought her little girl over today....and she is a total doll. She is obviously raising her right, she is the sweetest, most polite little girl ever. And cute as can be. wub.gif wub.gif Braedin really enjoyed having another kid to play with. thumb.gif

redchief replied: Kudos to your daughter (and you) for not prejudging this girl. We're all capable of making mistakes... some just have longer effects than others. It's great that your daughter has decided to befriend a young girl who so obviously needs to experience being a teenager despite the baggage she has no choice but to carry.

mckayleesmom replied:
Oh...don't get me wrong....I totally get your shock.....You asked what MY feelings would be....and that is what I meant.....I wasn't saying that you were judging her or changing your feelings on her. thumb.gif

MoonMama replied:
Thanks Brianne! hug.gif I just wanted to make sure I didn't come off that way. thumb.gif

Sam & Abby's Mom replied: I'd be shocked, too but I think you handled it the right way.


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