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Kind of hurt by something - someone said yesterday.


MoonMama wrote: I've been going back and forth about posting this, trying to get let it roll off but I'm having a hard time. Its REALLY bothering me. But long story short. I over heard a family member say something yesterday (they don't know I heard) and I'm pretty hurt by it. We have some extended family (my ex SIL's family, but we have all remained close, which I have always loved that we could do that). Anyway they came to Baredin's birthday party yesterday and while she and her husband were outside in front I had gone around back to the side of the house to take something to the trash. I over heard her telling her husband "You know I love Ally to pieces but she really is anal about EVERYTHING. I can see it in Alec's eyes he hates it and wants out. And she is way to over protective of Brae, and tries so hard to come off as this perfect mom in all aspects." sad.gif sleep.gif I'm just really hurt by this. Esp. since you know I don't have to let them be a part of our lives esp. Braedin's but I do....And I have know issue letting those who love him be a part of his life. I just I guess I feel a pretty stung and attacked KWIM? I just don't know how to handle this and let it go. But right now I really don't want them around. bawling.gif growl.gif bawling.gif growl.gif

Do I really come off like that? huh.gif

lisar replied: Honey I dont know you in real life, but from what I have seen on here NO your not like that. Maybe she is just jealous and wants to have what you have? I would let it roll of my shoulders and if it keeps bothering you call her and ask her why she said that.
hug.gif hug.gif hug.gif

mckayleesmom replied: Jeesh...Jealous Much.......What a horrible thing to say.....Get rid of that toxin in your life... growl.gif

lovemy2 replied: Aww Ally I am so sorry you heard something like that - and as far as I am concerned what is really wrong with trying to be a perfect Mom in all aspects - most of us do hug.gif

What does Alec say???

Try to let it roll off your back but in the meantime I would steer clear of them - in my opinion there are some things better left unsaid hug.gif hug.gif hug.gif why put yourself through the pain of what else she may say hug.gif hug.gif

Maddie&EthansMom replied: I wouldn't necessarily consider being overprotective and anal about being a good wife and mother bad things. And honey, I doubt very seriously your DH wants out. wink.gif Especially if you are what she claims.

I wouldn't let it get to me. You are a very sweet person to let her stay involved with Brae. Maybe its time you part ways. You don't want her negativity getting to you. hug.gif

mammag replied: I would probably say something. Not in a mean way but just say it like you said it to us. You overheard her and it hurt but you weren't going to say anything about it except it is getting to you and you wanted to have her explain. Especially about what she said about your husband. Did you tell him what she said? It might make you feel better to hear from him that he absolutely does not want out.

The other route would be to not say anything, I'm just the kind of person who would let it eat me up inside if I didn't say anything.

I'm so sorry you had to even hear her obviously jealous rant. hug.gif hug.gif I'd rather be overprotective than what I see from many moms these days!

Nina J replied: Every parent is protective, it is a good thing. Who doesn't want to be a good mother? I don't think you try to be the perfect parent, from what I can see you know parenting has good days and bad days and isn't always the perfect journey. To me, you seem like a great parent and Brae looks like he is a really happy little boy. hug.gif

What did you dh say?

luvbug00 replied: hug.gif hug.gif how sad that she had to stoop that low to make herself feel good. I'm sorry that you were hurt in the prossess hug.gif

My3LilMonkeys replied: hug.gif hug.gif

A&A'smommy replied: not something I would have ever portrayed you as but nonetheless that was an uncessary comment hug.gif hug.gif btw I think you are a wonderful person and mom

MoonMama replied: Thanks everyone, I really appreciate the comments. hug.gif

I did tell Alec and he is furious. He said he does NOT want out by any means and has never been happier. wub.gif wub.gif He loves me and Braedin more then anything. love2.gif love2.gif

I think it may be time to part ways. sleep.gif I do and don't want to say something but I think I want to cool down before I decide for sure, KWIM?

HuskerMom replied: hug.gif hug.gif

A&A'smommy replied: hug.gif hug.gif yeah it might be if they are just going to bring you down then that is something negative in your life that you do not need. I can say that I sorta know how you feel though its a hard decision to have to make

CantWait replied: Sorry hun hug.gif hug.gif

There are way to many people in this world that want to bring us down, our "friends" and "family" shouldn't be one of them.

paradisemommy replied: hug.gif write her a thank you card for coming to the party and slip it in there - that you overheard her say those extremely hurtful things and that you are just being the best wife and mother that you possibly can and that alec loves you and brae to pieces and couldn't be happier and if that's how she feels then your family does NOT need that negativity around them.

i think you're a great mom and wife..don't let them get to you..i had the exact thing happen to me but believe it or not it was a family member that said some things about my children and my parenting - i got all riled up and was extremely ticked but once the smoke cleared i realized it just goes to show you how much that family member didn't know ME or my kids at all... hug.gif

Kirstenmumof3 replied: hug.gif hug.gif hug.gif

gr33n3y3z replied:
Are you asking yourself or us?
But just remember your being the nice one letting those people be a part of Braedins life you can always cut that tie you know

3xsthefun replied: hug.gif

My2Beauties replied: hug.gif Wow those are very hurtful comments and I can see how you'd be upset...but honestly who isn't protective over their children and try to be the best wife/mother there is! Hon, those comments are nothing but pure jealousy! wink.gif

my2monkeyboys replied: I agree with the others.... at least on here you seem like a very sweet, happy, loving mother and wife. If you're all that horrible of a person in real life, then why would she want to continue being around you???
I certainly wouldn't let it bother me, esp since Alec responded the way he did. Obviously he thinks the world of you two and that is all that matters.
As to whether or not you should say anything, well, that's up to you. Either way though I wouldn't be so quick to invite her to other functions. hug.gif hug.gif hug.gif hug.gif

MommyToAshley replied: It sounds like jealousy to me. I agree with Aimee, with the exception of the part about Alec wanting out, I would consider most those things as a compliment --

Being overprotective = not being negligent and protecting your child like a Mom should. (I've been accused of being over-protective on more than one occasion)

Tries so hard to come off as this perfect mom = wants to be a good Mom (what's wrong with that?)

Is anal about everything = Pays attention to details and knows the little things matter.

I have to admit, sometimes I am a tiny bit jealous of Moms that seem to have it all together all the time because I certainly don't. Although, I would never say anything like that, I try to learn from those Moms instead. But, you really shouldn't let it get to you. It sounds like she views you as one of those people that has really got it together and instead of trying to pick up a few pointers she's looking for a fault that doesn't exist. If it were me, I would just ignore it and go on with life. Otherwise, you let her have power and influence over you ... which is what she wants. What is important is what you and your husband know is right for your family.

jcc64 replied: Ita with everything Dee Dee said. I probably would say something, very diplomatically, even if she was anything but. When confronting someone, it's always good to focus on being hurt rather than angry, it's disarming when you admit your vulnerability to an adversary, kwim? We all just want to be loved and accepted for who we are, and I would simply put it like that. She may get it, she may not, but at least you'll know you've done everything you could to put the matter to rest. Then you can walk away and not stew about it- clean slate.
Good luck, hon. hug.gif

Calimama replied: NO you're not any of what she described. You're a GREAT mommy. Everyone strives to be the best mom they can be.. it has little to do with perfection, it's wanting to do the best things for our kids.

And the whole Alec comment... pfft. She's jealous because he stands up for you and won't let the nastiness that comes from that family affect his decision to be with you.

I know it's hard not to let it get to you but just keep in mind you're great to both of them, and if she can't get past her jealousy and resentment to see that, then it's her loss.

hug.gif hug.gif hug.gif hug.gif hug.gif

mom21kid2dogs replied: Living well IS the best revenge! cool.gif
Seriously, I wouldn't waste one more minute of my life on it. People like that are just not worth it.

MoonMama replied: Thanks guy, I'm trying to just let it roll off and realize for whatever reason she feels the need to make herself feel better by putting others down. Its her loss. dry.gif

Celestrina replied: growl.gif What is it with people these days? It is best to cool down before you say anything. Remember one thing, what she says doesn't matter, just what Alec said.


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