Just Wondering Your Opinion On A Comment Made
GavinsMommy wrote: I was on the phone w/ my best girl friend last night. We have known each other literally since we were born bc our parents went to hs together.
We had stopped speaking for a few months and then she emailed me and I let her know that I was pregnant. Well we have gotten back on good terms but last night...
We were talking and I told her that the baby wasn't really moving that much yesterday and she kinda laughed and said..."Maybe he's dead" She thought it was a funny joke that she said that. I told her that wasn't funny and that she shouldn't say stuff like that bc people lose their babies all the time and she was like, "I was just kidding, GOD!"
But I don't think that's anything to kid about. I think she is just jealous that I'm pregnant because though she won't admit it now, she wants a baby with her bf and they haven't used protection in the whole 2 years they have been together.
How mad would you be about that comment? I'm debating not speaking to her again since she thought it was so funny
A&A'smommy replied: That was SOO mean of her to say that kidding or not kidding its NOT funny! My opinion is she is jealous and has a LOT of growing up to do. I lost friends when I got pregnant at 17 because we were all about smoking, and doing anything that had to do with being teenagers, although we weren't really wild I knew that they didn't have a clue what it was like to be 17, pregnant and married it was very difficult we didn't talk much and when we did it was very uncomfortable. We are friends again now best of, in fact I'm going to be the matron of honor in her wedding in Febuary, and I'm planning her wedding shower in January. Do what you think is best for you and your little one, if you think its going to be like that a lot don't talk for a little while and see how that goes. I know its difficult but it kinda sounds like you don't really want to be friends with her right now anyway. I'm sorry that she is being like that!
Edited: If you don't mind me asking how old are you?
amynicole21 replied: Sounds like pure immaturity to me. I would have been so mad... sorry she said that to you 
loveydad replied: Oh I would be PISSED. That is NOT funny. I know the uncertainty of not being able to feel the baby move - I went through that with some of my kids. I would totally ball her out for it if it was me (not saying you should do that!) That's rude and immature.
Kirstenmumof3 replied:  OMG I can't believe she said that too you! That's just awful! Glad you told her how upset your were about it!
GavinsMommy replied: I agree with all of you. I'm just not going to even talk to her anymore. We have been friends for so long and I think that part of the reason is because it is just convenient to continue to be. Did I mention that her bf is my ex? Lol.
I am 18 and my husband just turned 25 and she is turning 19 soon and her bf is 20 but she is just not on my level anymore. I was over the whole "teenager" thing when I was still barely into my teens. I feel that I am a lot more mature than she is and that her comment was made just out of jealousy because I am about to have a family. She is doing nothing with her life and it would be sad to me if she were having a baby. I have tried to tell her, even before I got pregnant myself, that having a baby at such a young age if not prepared or planned for, is not something one should strive for but she just doesn't get it. She *tries* to get pregnant but I think that she can't have children because she had some cervical problems that required laser surgery. I know now that it is most likely a jealousy thing because before I told her about me being pregnant, she always talked about wanting a baby. Now that I am pregnant she says that is the last thing she wants, but interestingly enough is still not using protection and has recently said she thinks she is pregnant. I know she is just lying about that for attention but ya know...
I graduated hs with a 3.8 gpa and she dropped out but hasn't even tried to go back. We're just different people now and I understand she is still immature. Oh well, just hurts to think of my baby "dead" as she said. 
A&A'smommy replied: I feel for you! One of my friends in our group tried to get pregnant after i did and then she had two miscarriages possibly three. Its sad, she like your friend dropped out of hs, and did absolutly NOTHING. My husband and I with our baby lived with her and her fiancee (ex now) for two months and I was miserable because she was SO lazy I did everything and she continued to try and get pregnant. It was all just a bunch of immature crap, if you look back in general discussions to last year when I was pregnant you will see a few of my vents about her. Anyway You are SOOO close to having a baby, are you ready? 
ediep replied: OMG! That is the most disgusting comment anyone can say to a pregnant lady! I would have burst into tears right then and there. That is so rude!!!! not to mention...I was very emotional while preg.
cg_inc replied: Hi all,
Im new, but I just wanted to say I am a young mom too and I had to deal with losing my friends and them just not understanding my kids are the most important thing in the world. I have a good friend who would compare her cats to my children! My friends did not accept that I can not go out and party or hangout. I would have been really hurt and upset if a friend would have said something so horrible, your so close to having the baby and I know that with both of mine I got paraniod at the end. You worry if movement stops or slows down and the last thing you want to hear is somthing so awful! good luck with the rest of your pregnancy, this is the most amazing time of your life  Enjoy it. PS I would not drop her as a friend, but I would not take her so seriously, she sounds like a child.
Candace
GavinsMommy replied: Well she hasn't called today so I'm glad. I'm just going to play it off like I am really busy with the baby almost here and everything. Then I just won't talk to her anymore.
Jessica, my husband's name is Jerimiah too...cept he spells it with two i's instead of the e, which is weird. I'm SO ready for this baby to come! I'm going to love being a SAHM. I didn't realize until I read your second post that you are what...19? 20? I thought from the first one that you were referring to being pregnant at 17 a long time ago or something until I put it together with my pregnant brain! Pregnant or not, I have no desire to hang around "normal" teenagers or young people. The things they engage in just aren't my style.
But thank you guys for all of your comments, makes me realize that I'm not overreacting by reconsidering our "friendship". Because it wouldn't have been too funny had something *really* been wrong.
Josie83 replied: Hi sorry I almost missed this topic. I would be so annoyed too! I agree with Amy, this person is just immature. I had my baby when i was 18 too, and I know what some ppl can be like . . . especially friends, who are interested in going out and being kids whereas you're thinking about your baby. Its not their fault, its just that you have to mature way fast because you're suddenly a mummy! I would have been so angry at her - ppl don't understand how precious that life inside of you is! I'm so sorry she said that to you - glad to see you getting to grips with the board now! There are quite a few mums on here who weren't very old when they had their babies, we can all help if you need it! xx
kimberley replied: that was a horrible and very immature thing for her to say. it sounds like you are a very well adjusted person and could do with friends who bring you up instead of down... what this girl seems to be doing. it is great that you recognize how full your life is. i think you are going to make a great mom 
Kaitlin'smom replied: what a terrible things to say, and as you pointed out it could have come from jeaslousy. I would maybe send an e-mail, or call her and let her know just how much that hurt you and if she is unable to support you then she need not be around. sorry she was so inconsiderate to say something like that, and mayeb it is tiem to maove on from people like that
TANNER'S MOM replied: OOOOOOOOOO I am sry that your friend, well NOT really friend anyway said that to u! 
DansMom replied: If someone made that comment to me, I would think they subconsciously disliked me or resented me, and I would definitely feel confused by it. I have one or two friends who have a very morbid sense of humor, always pushing the limits of what is acceptable, and I think even they would not venture into that territory with a pregnant woman. She may be unaware of her own resentful feelings and jealousy toward you. You could respond by telling her you think her comment shows resentment and ill-will, and either get her to talk about her feelings (be supportive and ignore the hurtful things she says, like you would with a child), or if that feels wrong to you, just tell her she needs to work through some issues on her own before you can be friends again. For me, I don't have time anymore to take care of other adults emotionally---before Daniel, I did, but now I don't---so I'm finding my high-maintenance friends have fallen by the wayside and my newer friends tend to be other parents who are emotionally mature and generally self-aware. With a friend of that long-standing, though, it might be worth the effort to set a good example of friendship on your end and let her decide how she wants to behave in response.
My2Beauties replied: That is a very rude and hurtful to say to a pregnant woman!!!! She sounds very immature and she does sound jealous by what you have described! I would steer clear of her until you can talk to her in a civil manner, don't want to end up in a shouting match and tell her if she can't keep those sorts of comments to herself then you simply, can't be friends! Point blank, make her put herself in your shoes when she said that comment and maybe she'll realize what she has said was absolutely uncalled for!!!
momof2girls replied: That is sooo mean, you do not need friends like that!
gr33n3y3z replied: How could anyone think of something like that much less say something like that.
I would have told her off and hung up the phone. Good God what is this world coming to 
Lollie replied: What a freakin stupid and horrible thing for her to say!!!!!! What possessed her!
You dont need friends like that..even if she was just kidding. We are all here for you if you wanna chat.  Who needs her when you've got us...LOL
Nicole replied: I would have been soooooooooo mad and hurt , oh my gosh how could anyone even joke about that, that is soooooooooo not funny.
I would have said something and told her that if she ever said any thing like that again to me i would not be talking to her again.
I`m sorry that was said to you at al no one should have to hear that from anyone.
Good luck and hugs,Nicole
MomofJandB replied: What an awful thing to say! I agree with what Dansmom said. As you have children, some friends go by the wayside, and you develop other relationships. Some old friends hang on and support you, but others are just your "party" friends, need a grip on reality and drop you or are cruel to you for one reason or another. You don't need those friends in your life. I firmly believe some friends are only meant to be around for a while. It's almost as though their friendship runs its course. I have some friends that I've simply lost touch with out of laziness and others I have purposely chosen to lose touch with. They were not healthy relationships and they brought me down and made me doubt myself. Right now I am happy to say that the people that are in my life now are well grounded and great people. Very little drama from the friends. You will be amazed to see how many different friendships you develop because of your kids. Someone that could say something so deliberately hurtful and insensitive sounds needy and jealous. You have to ask yourself if it's really worth it.
Can't wait to hear about your new baby! When is the baby due? Do you know what you're having?
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