Jason's second day at the gym playroom - meltdown!

ediep wrote: As if I don't already feel guilty enough that I am putting Jason in the daycare at the gym so I can work out for an hour a few times a week, I look outside the aerobics room today and the sitter is there holding Jason. I run out there to see what happened and she said that he has been crying. I asked him whats wrong and he just said that he wanted to go home.
I got him to calm down and I tried to put him back in the daycare room so I could gather my things and use the restroom before we left, and he started crying as soon as I opened the door to the room.
I feel so bad because i am so torn.....should I keep going so hopefully, he'll get used to it. MAybe I should only leave him for 20 minutes and gradually work up to an hour (although all the aerobics classes are 1hour) I don't know what to do.... I don't want to go when DH is home in the evening.
I feel like I want to cry!

coasterqueen replied: Gosh Edie, I wish I had some advice for you I know how you feel though because Kylie will do this to me when I drop her off at daycare some days. She'll say "mommy don't leave me, please don't leave me, I need you". So I'll stay for a bit and then leave and it usually makes things a bit better, but not always. If I didn't have to leave her I wouldn't, especially on those days when she says things like that to me.

Are you going every day? Maybe go every other day or maybe just 2x a week at first and see how that goes, maybe it won't be so bad then.

ammommy replied: It's really hard, but keep at it. Megan did the same thing for the first few weeks and while it's heartwrenching to hear, he will be OK. Will they come and get you if he's unconsolable? They give Megan 15 minutes at my gym then page me to calm her down.
but stick with the workouts.

ediep replied: thanks guys!
I plan on going 3 times per week for an hour each time....Mon, wed, and Fri and most of those days my friends 2 year old is there too, Jason knows her and plays with her at home every week. I know that he just isn't used to that many kids running around, but it really breaks my heart....i feel so guilty.
they will let him cry for 5 minutes then they page me or come to get me.
I am getting a stomach ache thinking about this.

My2Beauties replied: OK I think you need to stick with your guns! I don't mean to sound harsh, but we can't always give in to our kids especially when it comes to doing things for ourselves that we really deserve! I know it's hard but Jason will get used to it and will love going to daycare eventually you just have to stick to it and be consistent with him!

ediep replied:
thanks! You are right!

ediep replied: anyone else have advice....how did your toddlers do their first few times away from you?

alice&arik replied: Arik was like this after we moved back to MN because I hadn't worked for 6 months. He would cry and scream when I dropped him off at daycare and run screaming to me when I picked him up. But she said he was fine as soon as I left. It only took a few minutes for him to forget about it. I would just keep trying it and see how it goes.

Otherwise could you work out at home? That is what I started doing. The gyms around here don't even have a daycare room. I got the Extreme Makeover Fitness DVD. Man it sure works good. And it is easy.

MommyToAshley replied: Maybe you could stay with him for a while to get him started on an activity and playing with the other girl that he knows, then let him know you will be back in a few minutes. I did this with Ashley when she went through a clingy stage and wanted me 24/7. I would start coloring (or anything) with her, then I would tell her I would be back in a few minutes. And, I would come back in a few minutes. Then I stretched out the time before I came back and then she started playing on her own again. I don't think I would sneak off though, I would let him know you are going but that you will be right back. If he knows he can count on you to come back when you say you are, then it might make things easier. I am sure he just needs to get used to it. I'd hate to see you give up the only time you have for yourself. I know how excited you were to join the arobics class again.

Sunflower04 replied: Getting him used to going to the daycare is going to make it easier for when he begins school. I guess keep that in mind. When I dropped Joey off at daycare he would cry but I wouldn't look back because it broke my heart. I bring him breakfast to eat at daycare everydayso he is busy eating while I am leaving. Now he doesn't cry and instead he waves goodbye. Good luck.

DVFlyer replied: This is one reason we don't take Chloe to the gym (other than my wife being 8 mos pg). She starts to cry. I would just stay with her for a bit and then tell her I'm going go... and point where I'm going. But she would still cry. I know she would get over it eventually. It might take a few weeks of leaving him for a few extra minutes crying each day to see if he stops.

Another idea, if the gym allows it, would be to see if he wants to bring a toy to show to the other kids. If he feels like he has a purpose there, it might not be as bad.... but probably will .

Good Luck! Keep at is probably the best advice.

loveydad replied: aww i would keep letting him go at least 1-2 times more.

Someone I know is in the same position as you are. Her daughter just turned 2 and she's really shy and doesn't like to be with anyone but mom- but of course she's never been away from mom much.

So she screams whenever she gets there - but she has two older siblings, 7 and 10, who would take care of her, but they have to go upstairs to the older kid's room (above 3) and they own't let her stay up there- she wouldn't cry if she was allowed.

anyway that daycare (in the gym) won't take them if they cry, won't feed a bottle, won't change them! They'll only take them for 1 1/2 hrs but STILL doesn't that seem exstreme?

What are the rules there?

A&A'smommy replied: Awwww Edie I'm so sorry I don't know what I would do but maybe going for a little while and then working it up! (((((HUGS)))))

mummy2girls replied: Jenna would do this once ina hwile when i drop her off at the daycare at my gym. Usually when there is other kids she is fine. But just keep at it. If he gets to a point where they cant handle him they will page you....

Kirstenmumof3 replied: I'm so sorry this happened to you! I would keep going and gradually work up to the whole hour. My oldest was like this, she had such a hard time leaving me. But she eventually got used to the idea. I'm sure he will be okay!

DansMom replied: Bummer!!! I was hoping this would go smoothly for you. I can't give advice since I've never tried to leave Daniel in a playroom or daycare environment yet (this fall with preschool should be fun....). I always hear from people that you need to give him at least a week to adjust to the new environment. I wouldn't give up just yet.