I was disturbed by this.

MoonMama wrote: I have been going back and forth about posting this all afternoon because I don't want to cause any kind of commotion. But today I took my niece and nephew to have pictures taken as a gift for there moms birthday. The studio was behind so we had a fairly long wait. Anyway in this time another lady came in with her little girl who I would have to say was about 3 or 4. My niece who is 10 mentioned how cute the little girl was and how cute her dress and hat was and I agreed. Then her mom opens up this huge duffle bag and starts giving this little girl a crazy hair and make up job. I'm talking curling her hair with tons of hair spray and adding hair pieces and putting more make up on this child then I think I wear in a month. The little girl BTW was not happy about it and her mom was pumping her full of candy to get her to sit still and let her do it. I was just think oh my word what the heck is this all about. Another mom sitting there and actually asked, "oh well don't you look pretty what's the special occasion?" To which the little girls mom says oh they need a picture for parents night and the year book for her pre-school (pre-schools have year books now? ) Now I ask you is this really necessary? I realize this is her child but gees. Now when I was about 7 I well down our porch stairs (thanks to our dog) the day before school pictures and my mom used a little bit of cover up to hide the bruise on my cheek. But come one what does a 3 or 4 year old need a whole hair and make up job for? An I just crazy?
Any thoughts?

My2Beauties replied: I really won't get into how badly I can't stand mothers who do this, only because I don't have time I'm getting ready to leave work, but this makes me ill and I probably couldn't have stood there and watched her a moment's longer without opening my big fat mouth. I don't agree with it whasoever!

MoonMama replied: Thank you! I'm glad I'm not crazy or the only person that wanted to open my mouth big time.

mom2my2cuties replied: Well I think each parent can do what they wish with thier child within reason. I put make up on Andrea frequently - she helps herself if I don't. She likes to wear my lipstick and my mascara and a little bit of blush.

And while I believe my daughter is a natural beauty and way to young for full scale make up - I think there is a limit to how much is 'ok' but i honestly think it's each parents discresion as to what is ok though.

Also - I make sure hers is so light that the only people who can tell she is wearing any is us.

Kirstenmumof3 replied: No I don't think your crazy at all! I agree that makeup on a 3 year old is just wrong! I think Emily painted Claudia's nails over the summer, but that's about the extent of makeup!

Boo&BugsMom replied: I personally think kids this young look ridiculous with makeup on, unless it's just a little bit of lipgloss for shiny lips. Kids this age are naturally beautiful and it doesn't look natural for kids to be pumped up with all that garbage. But that's just my opinion. I just think it looks silly, that is all, at a preschool age. Don't think it's "wrong", but it just looks silly.

ataylorm replied: As tish mentions above, she likes to put a little bit on Andy from time to time (mostly weekends), and it absolutely drives nuts! I can't understand why she needs makeup yet, let alone squirts of mom's $40 a bottle perfume. It was hard enough when Andy started begging to get her toes and fingers done when mom was doing hers, but the rest just drives me nutso...

MoonMama replied: Now I'm not saying all make up is bad and I did have play make up growing up because like all little girls I wanted to be like mommy. But i was never aloud to wear it outside the house ever.

We never did get our pictures taken BTW they were so behind we waited 2 plus hours then I finally had to get the kids home. I'm going to take them to a pretty park this weekend and take them with my digital and see what we get. What I really what is some 8 x 10 black and whites anyway.

coasterqueen replied: Well I think some of you are missing the point here. The OP is talking about doing this to get pics taken..not playing around the house. Kylie puts on play make-up when she's pretending and playing dress-up. I don't have a problem with that at all. It's putting on make-up to go get pictures and pumping the hair full of crap just so they look like something they really aren't.

I agree kids have a natural beauty at this stage and don't need that stuff. Playing around the house w/make-up is one thing...wearing it for photos is another.

MoonMama replied:
hang in there dad, I think most little girls are this way, and I don't have an issue with that so much. Its this whole head of crazy over the top hair and make up that this little girl obviously didn't want. And poor thing I wouldn't want hair piece's glued to me poor little head ether.

MoonMama replied:
exactly what I meant.

3_call_me_mama replied: I feel there is NO NEED to be dolling little girls up to look like little adults. The hair curling is one thing, (like if they ad long bangs and they were trying to keep them off the face for a picture, but spray.. no ! It's not good for US or them to be breathing that crap in let alone getting in the habit of using it on a 3 year old. Would I say anything to a parent about it? Not a total stranger, but to a friend or relative yes. basically cause i'm not one to hold my tongue but I dont' feel it's my place to tell a stranger my thoughts especially out in a public place like portrait studio. Kathleen gets her toes painted and once has had her nails done. And she has had lip gloss on twice. because she found a tube in teh overnight bag and wanted to put it on. Other thatn that nope. I dont' wear any makeup other than foundation sometimes and eyeliner rarely so she really wouldn't be exposed to wanting to be like mommy. (KWIM?) IF she asks for those pretend makeup kits when she's older (say 6-8) then maybe I'll let her, but not before then, and not out of the house. AND if someoen buys them for her before i feel she should have them, they will either get returned for a more appropriate toy or put away till she's older.

mom2my2cuties replied:
Dad usually gets told to get over it

And about the perfume - She sees me putting it on and lately has wanted to be just like mom

And now while I will say I wouldn't doll Andy up like you are describing for a picture because then she wouldn't look like Andy anymore. Which I think defeats the purpose of the pictures.

We have VERY similar skin tones and so make up that is virtually invisible on me is on her as well. The mascara - is on just enough that you can tell (barely on the edges of the eye lashes), lipstick matches our lips exactly.

mckayleesmom replied: McKaylee asks me to put on some makeup every now and then...and I do a tiny bit..not even noticeable......and toenails and fingernails polished from time to time.

This mom sounded like she did go over the top.


I ADMIT that I do put a little bit if compact powder on each of them when they go to get pictures done.....but thats because Ive usually got them done in the summer and because they swet before we got there...their foreheads get shiny in the pics.

cameragirl21 replied: haha, this question is right up my alley...welcome to my everyday life.
To be honest, when people hire me to take their kids' pictures for any occasion or for no occasion, they are not made up and since I'm very into natural looking shots, the type of people who are big into making their kids up would not hire someone like me for photography, they'd be more inclined to go to Glamour Shots or something to that effect.
BUT
when I shoot children for publication, which I do quite often ALL my blondes and redheads are made up and their hair gets done, often by a team of professionals. Often my dark haired kids get made up too but for blondes and redheads, this is a must...for girls only of course.
It's very little makeup and I always tell the makeup artist that I don't want them to look made up, it's just to bring out their features. And as for their hair, sometimes we do something for their hair, sometimes not, I'm not into updo or anything unnatrual but due to the humidity here in South Florida, sometimes we do require some spray or gel or something to keep their hair in place.
I always run this by the parents before we even come to any agreement and I've never come across a parent who has an issue with it, some parents prefer to do it themselves as opposed to a makeup artist which I have no problem with as long as they understand what needs to be done.
TBH, in the world of children's modeling, makeup is the least of issues...bottom line is it is hard work for both the kids and the parents and I always tell the parents that if I see the kids aren't enjoying it then they shouldn't be doing it. I am continutally amazed by what some of these kids can understand and convey in a picture, and for some kids, it's the opportunity of a lifetime and a lot of fun, they usually count the days till we shoot but obviously it's not for all kids, just like anything else.

Jamison'smama replied: Sounds like a pagent mom. Jamison gets toenail polish and that's it. She is pale as pale can be and would benefit from some blush sometimes but I feel she has her whole life to put that damaging stuff on her face. Keep then young and innocent as long as possible.

Okay, Jamison had a giant pimple on her nose before school pictures. I touched some powder on it to quiet it down a bit

ETA she does play with it on occasion at home only--I'm not an ogre.

CantWait replied:
There's a big difference between playing dress up with mommies make up and being subjected to wearing it when you don't want to because mommy wants you to look pretty. Doesn't send a very good message to the child if you ask me.

That's all I'll say though...

punkeemunkee'smom replied: Sounds like a pagent mom Tay's dance company is full of these little girls~recital dressing rooms were a sight to behold Tay plays with lip gloss and pink blush at home only. I think it is really sad for these little girls that get made-up for pictures, it seems to say that they are not pretty enough naturally Besides what do they have to look forward to when they are old enough to do all that big girl stuff? She is a little girl and I want her to stay that way for as long as possible

My3LilMonkeys replied: We don't do any makeup. Though I rarely wear it myself, so they don't see it all that often. Brooke does get fingernails & toenails painted when she's been good but that's it.

BAC'sMom replied:

Amen Abbie

DH flipped when Ansley had to wear make up for her dance recital last year. She is allowed toe polish and that is about it. They are only children for such a short time. We feel there is plenty of time for makeup later maybe when she turns 16.

amynicole21 replied: Well, Sophia went to the beaty shop at Disney and got extensions, make-up and press-on nails She loves that crap But, I would never even think to put it on her for "real life."

Crystalina replied: Izabella has a whole stash of make-up and she's constantly putting it on herself or Daddy. I will take her through and let her buy whatever make-up she likes. No foundation, eyeliner or mascarra. She has every color nail polish, lipstick and blush. It's all for play though. She cannot even wear lip gloss out of the house. To me it looks like she has been sucking on a peice of greasy bacon and never wiped her mouth. Yuck.

To the OP though, I don't get it either. These are mothers that are making their daughters feel like objects. They will grow up to never be happy with their bodies or the way they look. It's a sad truth that mothers do this all the time. I had Izabella in a pageant one time and she won. She was Baby Ohio in 2001. I was very proud but she was only a few weeks old. I did it because I had a girl that I waited for for 10 yrs and I wanted to show her off. I have never done it since and would never do it again. She would love to do another one but it's not going to happen. You never know who is watching in the audience (John Mark Karr ). I did it before she knew what a pageant was and before she could get feelings that she wasn't good enough.

skinkybaby replied: I put gel In Grace's hair semi-regularly. And on a rare occasion, hair spray for pictures. But she has curly hair and with the insane humidity levels here it's a must or her hair poofs out like a toddler fro.


But no makeup for pictures. Thats crazy.

coasterqueen replied:
Well that's cute and FUN......to tell you the truth I'm jealous....I would have loved it as much as the girls did.

mom2my2cuties replied: I agree with you Karen - there is a difference in doing it if the child wants to and forcing the baby to do it by bribery -

What i was trying to say (And I don't have a way with words at all ) is that if it's done in fun - I am ok with it but outside of that I'm really not. But it's not for me to judge how someone else raises thier child Because a lot of people I have met disagree with some of my parenting style too.

C&K*s Mommie replied: JonBenet Ramsey (GOD rest her soul) and the other little girls that looked like porcelian dolls, was what I thought of immediately. To each his own. I agree that I do not think it is sending the right message to the child, but to each his own. There are far worse things involving children that parents do without a second thought. This is minimal, there may be irreparable damage done to the childs self image, but it may also be strictly for pics, and pics alone-- not pageants.

Play makeup is fine in my book too.

cameragirl21 replied: Nicole, I just wanted to tell you that none of my modeling kids are made up anywhere near what JonBenet looked like...in fact when I work with makeup artists that's one of the first things I tell them, literally something to the effect of, "i don't want her all JonBeneted out." None of my modeling kids even look like they're wearing makeup, it's so light you can't even see it BUT when you see pics of them without makeup vs with makeup you definitely CAN see a difference, not that they're wearking makeup per se but rather that their features are more drawn out.
And to be fair, it's par for the course in the industry...I bet Anne Geddes put makeup on all those babies, or at least some of them. I never put makeup on babies though, and can't imagine I ever would but again, it's part of the industry....

MoonMama replied: Okay thanks for letting me know I'm not crazy here or the only one disturbed by this. The whole child beauty pageant thing, that I don't understand what so ever.

C&K*s Mommie replied: I understand Jennifer. Natural looking makeup my children would be fine in my book. Even touch ups after the photo shoot is fine too. It is just that little pageant girls (little is emphasized) are made to look like porcelain dolls, and that is too far over the top for me.

cameragirl21 replied: I agree entirely, Nicole, little girls should look like little girls. But when you take a picture for publication, you have to add something to bring out their features...I could show you some of my pics for publication and you'll not even realize they're made up at all.
Btw, I have a pic of me and if you explain to me how to upload it here I'll post it....

MoonMama replied:
I agree, and we had a little girl on our street growing up whose was mom was very hard core about pageants with her. It was so sad to see, her mom was always bribing her with candy and gifts etc. to get her to do what she wanted. Their basement was done up for her pageant practice which she did a few hours a day. Her mother was always on her case about something she was never aloud to ride her bike go swimming etc. for fear she would scrap herself or ruin her hair. Her and her mom would literally during the summer travel all over the south from one pageant to the next for weeks or even a couple months. This girl grew up honestly very sad all the time and with extremely low self esteem. To make a long story short she got pregnant at 14 just to get out of ever having to do another pageant.

cameragirl21 replied: Ally (MoonMama), I am TOTALLY against pageants for children under the age of 16. That is a ridiculous way for a child to grow up and I have been known to lecture parents on this and have lost clients because I've refused to photograph the kids all harlotted out for pageant pics.
Modeling is one thing, pageants are another.
Pageants are a waste of a childhood and I definitely think pageant moms have serious issues.

MoonMama replied:
Agreed. BTW I would love to see more of your work. I just love it.

Nina J replied: I let Emily wear make-up at home, just for fun. We dress up, she does my makeup and I do hers (I end up looking like I should be working the streets ).

I wouldn't put makeup on either of my girls to have there picture taken. I don't think it's right, unless it's to cover a bruise or something.

I've seen pictures of pageant girls, omg! Could they wear anymore makeup? I don't think it's right. It makes JonBenet Ramseys make-up look like nothing. (Plus, the media airbrushes alot of the pictures of little JonBenet, John and Patsy Ramsey's book really shows how the media exploited an innocent 6-year-old )

hawkshoe replied: I didn't read the other posts, so sorry if this is a repeat.

Personally, I think this is sending a horrible message to the daughter. Subliminally it is telling her that she isn't good enough just as she is. What a horrible thing to do to a young child. It is one thing to play dress up, it is entirely another to make her up and add hair extensions to make her more beautiful for pictures. I feel sorry for that little girl.

gr33n3y3z replied: I'm very into the natural look
for myself and kids

luvbug00 replied: I let Mya wear or have bought her the following:

pink and light green eye shaddow- ( she puts it on herself ,a very light barlely noticeable application 90% of the time I don't know she is wearing any)

lip gloss

color hair extentions- that attach to her poney holder

hair color - she has had pink hair and she wants purple after the wedding.

nail polish- she has baby blue and pinks, tangerine and red. ( red comes off before she goes out)

tattoos- temporary, Brad and I have 11 between us she sees it and wants one. ( all tattoos must be in somwhere covered by clothes ie. ankle, leg, tummy, etc....

hair gel and sprays- her hair becomes a poof ball in the humidity and so we tame it as needed.

when modeling the most make up worn was gloss and blush.

that's all i have to say about that.

mom2my2cuties replied: I forgot about one thing - that is with the hair - Andy has amazing curly hair - but it gets really frizzy if left untamed.

jcc64 replied: Well, I don't ever wear make-up, so obviously I don't see the need for little girls to be wearing it either.Correct me if I'm wrong, but I always thought makeup was used to enhance what's already there, and if you're correcting for imperfections at age 3, man, that kid is gonna be dropping alot of cash at the makeup counters over her lifetime.

redchief replied: Kids don't need make-up.

mom2my2cuties replied:
Wow Ed - man of many words today huh?

TheOaf66 replied: I agree with you, no need for the the make up and such, that doesn't look like the child in my opinion. The yearbook for a preschool, I don't get it...why? There are parents that are so hung up on looks and such, me I would send Tanner there as himself...T-shirt, jeans, and tennis shoes but I know DW would not allow that, he would at least have to wear nicer clothes. To each his own I guess.

mom2my2cuties replied: Something just struck me about this - when you do year books - aren't you supposed to be remembered for who you really are??

that is how we felt about yearbooks when I was in school...I mean sure - try to look nice that day - but don't change so much you don't look like you??

And since when do preschoolers need yearbooks anyway???? I mean really.

redchief replied:
Oh I thought of a great many words to say on this. But that one sentence pretty much said all I felt on the subject. Kids are beautiful and don't need artificial enhancements. To me, make-up just steals their humanity by making them conform to a standard of look that shouldn't be any standard anyway.

My2Beauties replied: OK so I'm going to add to what I already said. I'm not an absolute stickler, Desiree and I play make-up all the time (she's much older than 3 though) but she isn't allowed to go out with it on - ever! She had on blush at our wedding and really light beige eyeshadow, that was it. You couldn't even tell she had anything on. Hanna gets her toenails painted and that is it. When I took us all 3 to Glamour Shots, the girl begged me to let her put some make-up on Hanna and I told her no 3-4 times. After I had already told her no she still tried to put some blush on her, Hanna took her sippy cup and hurled it at her OK so I know that was wrong, but I kind of felt like that was what she deserved, my whole experience with them was awful anyways. When they did Desiree they curled up her hair and stuff and put light eyeshadow and stuff on her, she looked beautiful without looking too made up(the pic is in my siggy). I specifically requested that she not have on heavy heavy make-up. But Glamour Shots is all about going and getting dolled up, that's one thing, but regular pictures that's absurd and the hair extensions - OMG don't even get me started, does she want to ruin her daughter's hair? When Hanna is 3 or 4 I will not mind her "playing" with blush and lip gloss and stuff but she will never leave the house with it on and she will continue to go make-upless in public until she is 14 or 15. I see no need for it until then. Even at 14-15 years old, some light blush, eyeshadow and light mascara should do the trick

redchief replied: I should add that I understand that little girls like to play "make-up", and I'm okay with that. Well, okay, so I'm not, but it's for different reasons.

MoonMama replied:
Nadia I know where your coming from and I totally agree, my mom always let us (my sister and I) play with make up and our hair, paint our toes etc. Girls will be girls and I do think its a good idea to let them explore you they are.

My issue was the extent this mom was going too. Full face of make up, foundation, blush, eye liner, eye shadow, curling her eyes lashes, mascaras, lip liner, lip stick, etc. And the glueing of the hair to this poor things head. OUCH! And bribing her to let her do so.