Honeymoon Dilemma

My2Beauties wrote: OK we leave for Vegas in 3 weeks and 1 day to be exact. I'm so excited, can't wait, etc etc...

The dilemma.......at first my mom was going to keep Hanna the whole week like she did last year and take her to Brian's grandma during the day while she worked. Hanna is really comfortable with my mom as she sees her all the time and loves her to death. She was fine the last time we left town. Mommy wasn't - but that's a different story Well, recently my dad has been talking about seeing if he could keep her the week we were gone down in Alabama with him. I know my dad worships the ground she walks on and she would be spoiled rotten down there, but she only sees my dad every 3-4 months or so when he comes in town or we go visit, and she was really leary of him and his girlfriend when they were up here for the wedding. She just doesn't know them as well. I let them take her Sunday to the lake with them so that Brian and I could have the day to ourselves, open presents, etc...and they said she did ok. She actually warmed up to them within a couple of days, but then they left and without her seeing them on a frequent basis I'm wondering if she would freak out again when dad came to get her before we left. It's a 5 hour drive too that she would have to take with dad. The last time she stayed a week with him she was 9 1/2 months old, she wasn't really clingy to any certain person like she is now, especially momma and mamaw! But it broke my heart when we went down there that time to pick her up because she had gotten used to Dad and Susie (his girlfriend) and wouldn't come to me the first day I was there, I literally cried my eyes out because she acted like she didn't know me! I'm afraid if she leaves to go down there with him she'll A) freak out and be upset the whole week, being away from not only me but everything she knows B ) might have too good of a time and be upset to come back and not want to leave Dad or C) If I split up the time mom takes her and dad takes her, like leave her with mom for the first few days then let Dad pick her up that Tuesday or so then she might freak out at that time, having mom and dad leave one day then have to leave mamaw a few days later! What would you guys do? Do you think she would be ok? I mean she has been really hung up on me lately and Brian too, she really wants to cling to us, I'm scared she'll be upset the whole week we're gone as it is, much less if she is in different surroudings! What to do??

My2Beauties replied:

Kaitlin'smom replied: Oh this is a hard one, ans it will be so much harder on you than her. In that aspect i woul dleave the plans as is, meaning let your mom watch her for the week, that wasy if she does freek then she has her nanna and familiar surrounding. this way your not worring all the time also and you can enjoy your honeymoon. Just plan another time for you dad to have her.

JAYMESMOM replied: This is gonna be harder on you than her. But since you already made plans with your mom I would leave her with your mom. Now if your mom reassures you that she doesn't mind you dad having her. Then do that. She will be fine. She may be a little leery at first but when children are left alone they adjust easier than when we are around. She will remember them as it has not been that long.

My daughter had not seen my in-laws since she was six months (she is now 16 months) and after two short visits has gotten very comfortable around them again.

As harsh at it sounds when mom is not around they always do much better.

Go have fun on your honeymoon.

My2Beauties replied: Oh yeah let me re-iterate that mom is ok with dad having her and honestly he would be upset if I said no, he never gets to keep her - EVER! I mean the last time he kept her was when she was 9 1/2 months old, she is 18 months old now! So I would feel bad if I said no, but I just don't want her to freak out.

A&A'smommy replied: Can he come down and stay with ya'll for a couple of days before ya'll leave that way she can get use to them? Or vice versa? I know all traveling is difficult but really that is the only thing I can think of!

My2Beauties replied: Alyssasmommy I thought about asking him to do that, I would feel so much more comfortable if he did! I think I may ask him to do that so I know she gets comfortable with him!

A&A'smommy replied:
Oh lol I hope it works out I know you would like for them to spend some time together but you also don't want her to get upset about the whole thing ((((HUGS))) I hope it goes well!!

mom2tripp replied: I don't know if your mom is like my mom or not but when she knows she is keeping Tripp that is all she looks forward to and she would be so mad if I told her I changed my mind. On the other hand your dad never gets to see his granddaughter and I'm sure she would be fine as soon as you left:) Let us know what you decide

Maddie&EthansMom replied: Can you tell your dad how you are feeling about this? Be honest and tell him that she is at the age where she has separation anxiety and if she is upset it will upset you. I'm sure he will understand. And if he does end up with her half the time, she really will be okay. Kids are resilient and it just takes a couple of minutes for them to adjust to change.

Good luck, hun!

amymom replied: I don't have any advice. I think what someone said about him coming a few days ahead will give her 'get used to' time.

Have a great honeymoon.

JessC replied: I would definitly split the time between them.

ediep replied: I would leave the plans as is. She is really comfortable with your mom and she is used to her routine of going to Brian's grandma every day, then thats what I would do....but on the other hand, its so nice that your dad wants to take care of her too and would be mad if he can't.....I guess what jessyAnn said about having him come down to your house a few days before to spend time together then take her back to his house when you guys leave is the next best thing

~Roo'sMama~ replied: Jessy Ann had a good idea. If he'd be willing to do that then I'd say go for it - otherwise I'd leave the plans as they are and plan a time in the near future for her to spend a few days with your dad too.