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DH's aunt passed away today - funeral plans


amynicole21 wrote: DH's aunt had been ill, so it wasn't COMPLETELY a surprise, but we didn't expect it so soon. We hadn't seen her in years, but she did love the girls very much. She was in her 70s and lived in Virginia. I'm thinking the funeral will be at the end of the week. I just looked into flights, and for the 4 of us to fly there it will be about $1200 plus hotel and car. We really don't have that right now... well, we have it, but we were hoping to use it in other ways. I really want to suggest to DH that HE go and the girls and I will stay home. After all, they are very young and I really wouldn't want them at the funeral - I don't know if anyone will be available to babysit though. I'm scared to bring it up though as it will hurt his feelings. Also, he would like family to see the girls. Ugh. sleep.gif

Do I suck it up??

mckayleesmom replied: Yes....Personally I would just suck it up....Money comes and goes, but family you can't get back....If it would mean alot to your dh...I would say go.

You can always skip the funeral part for the girls and just do the family gathering thing.

TrulyBlessed replied: First and foremost, I'm sorry for your loss. (many prayers for the family) I do think you should be sensitive to your husband's wishes in regards if he would like you to make the trip with him. However, I don't agree with young children going to funerals. My dad died in 04 and I did not allow my daughter's to go to the funeral, I just don't think it is a place for young children. If you go with him, I would maybe mention that he attend the funeral alone, so you could stay with the children. If he really wants them at the funeral, then I would discuss it depending upon your own feelings.

Calimama replied: I would suck it up. It may not be how you WANTED to use the money but that's not always the most important thing IMO. I'm sorry about his aunt. hug.gif hug.gif hug.gif

Cece00 replied: well, considering OUR families, I wouldnt go. But we're not really close to ANY aunts or uncles. If they were local, I'd go, but no, I wouldnt spend $1200 to go to their funeral.

BUT, if he is close to her & he wants you to go, I'd go. But I would NOT bring my young children, at all, either way.

When DH's grandmother (mother's mother) died, I didnt go to the funeral. First off, it was late in the day & in New Orleans...I wasnt dragging the kids to a funeral in the late afternoon to follow with 3 hrs of driving. Second, DH wasnt close to his grandmother, at all (she was a very mean, spiteful woman who I had only met 3 times) & he said he would go (even though he didnt want to) but that I didnt have to go...we had a very young child at the time, so he said I should stay home & rest & not to worry about it. He happened to be working in NO that day, otherwise I am not sure he wouldve gone himself.

MoonMama replied: I'm so sorry for your loss. But I agree I would suck it up and go, esp knowing it means so much to DH. And I bet it will mean a lot to the whole family for you all to be there. hug.gif hug.gif

amynicole21 replied: OK, so I finally got up the courage to tell DH I didn't want the girls going to the service but I would stay back with them (still traveling to VA) while he went. He looked at me like I was crazy and said "are you thinking ALL 4 of us would go?" Uh, yeah. No, that's too expensive! So, we really were on the same page. See - this is why we need to work on our communication skills. rolleyes.gif

gr33n3y3z replied: So sorry to hear this news
hug.gif hug.gif prayers for the families

coasterqueen replied:
hug.gif hug.gif hug.gif

I am sorry for your loss.

sparkys2boys replied: hug.gif So sorry for you loss hug.gif

3xsthefun replied: I'm so sorry for your loss. hug.gif

kit_kats_mom replied: check your email amy. wink.gif


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