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Am I doing some wrong as a Mom?


toady_buckshot_noodle wrote: sad.gif I should really post this on a different board but this one moves faster. hehehe.

My oldest Daughter is 12 and super smart. I don't talk about it much because people tend to think you are bragging, but she has a 170 IQ. She scores advanced on all sujects of standardized testing well into college level. She participated in People to People World Leadership Forum in Washington D.C. as a student ambassador. She was given an 8th grade equivalancy test through Duke University in the 5th grade and ranked in the 99th percentile. She is taking the SAT in a couple of months through Duke University to rank her scores.

Well, it is great but it is hard! She CAN NOT keep quiet in class. Ever since she was 4 I have had meetings with teachers about her talking in class.

This morning I had to talk to her social studies teacher about it. The teacher said she comes in wound up from the class before (PE) and takes a while to settle down. She said she blurts out answers and does not pay attention. I asked the teacher if her grades were reflecting this (I didn't think so) and she said dd has an 102 average! Her principals in the past have had the teachers give her extra work to keep her busy but this is a new school and they don't "single kids out" they are all treated the same.

Some have suggested that she skip a grade but I don't like that idea, we live in a small town and everyone knows her and she would be treated differently and I am afraid it would make things worse.

When I ask her why she talks in class when she knows and undestands the rules she simply says " I don't know". I have tried every kind of punishment I can think of. I just don't know what else to do. She is 12 and I am tired of this!!

And no, she does not have ADHD, that was determined years ago.

I have scheduled an appointment with a counselor but I am afraid she will think that I think she is crazy and it will make things worse.

Does anyone have any suggestions???

luvbug00 replied: I'm sorry but I think you need to have her re evaluated I am 23 and I had that problem all my life it sounds like she does have ADHD! All the smartest minds in the world did ( they just hadn't diegnosed it yet. wink.gif ) it's not a horrible thing you know.

toady_buckshot_noodle replied: happymom, I know that's what it sounds like and I thought so too. But she does not have a "hyper" bone in her body. She can sit down and read an entire chapter book in a day! Her teachers even told me not to have her tested because they didn't think that was the problem because they see it all the time.

luvbug00 replied: I am not hyper at all I sit threw plays and read full books with ease I was a ballerina and champion dancer. I made ehh grades but I was never hyper or acted like a crazy child but I had ADHD which later was diagnosed as ADD . and with that comes the persons lack to hold on to thier attention span. for example I hear the teacher I learn the material but I can do it while talking to my friends or listening to music. My mind will focas on the task at hand but it will also wander off and I'll start talking or thinking of somthing else but I retain the infomation presented to me.

for example while I talk on the phone I'm able to type on the computer papers for my work and hold a full conversation and not really [pay attention to what I'm typing but when i hang up My paper is written including all the thoughts I wanted to incorperate into it. It's complicated I'd be more then happy to explain more if you want to PM me. hug.gif

toady_buckshot_noodle replied: happymom please check your pm

gr33n3y3z replied: I think she is bored
But the calling out in class is her way saying it even tho she knows its wrong but she just cant help herself.

We both know its wrong to call out in class I think the teacher has to figure out away to control that.

Good luck smile.gif

Let us know how she does

amymom replied: I agree with Lisa. I think she is bored.

I also think Nadia has many good points and speaks from experience.

I think a counselor is your best bet at this point. Going to a counselor does not mean you think she is crazy, so don't present it that way.
My DD IQ tested out at over 150 at 4 yrs old, so I understand what you say about not skipping a grade, but now that she is getting towards HS I think more advanced subjects may be what she needs.

Can you homeschool?

CantWait replied: I'm agree with greeneyes, I'd say she's bored. The work is obviously too easy for her and she's got nothing else to do. Who cares what people in your town say, skip her...it would probably be the best thing for her.

MyBrownEyedBoy replied: I was the 150+ IQ, 10 year old. Not easy. I was not a talker, but I was constantly in trouble for daydreaming in class. Well, I was bored to tears, what else was I to do? Ask your daughter how she would feel about skipping a grade. She is 12, she should be involved in decisions. It may help her feel like she can talk to you and like she has a say in things. Also, I was finally put into a once a week enrichment program in 5th grade, I had tested for it since I was 7, but all my teachers until that point said I couldn't focus well enough (daydreaming). Maybe see about other programs for gifted kids in your area. And don't hesitate about counseling. Feeling different left me with some unique scars on my wrists. Not saying she is me, but I could probably have talked with a stranger better than I could to my parents. Hugs to you, this isn't easy for you or her.

T&MsMom replied: palmettomooner,
I agree that boredom is an issue but I also think that with an intelligent child like your daughter, the teacher should do a better job reaching her. I don't know about your school but the problem with the schools in my area and surrounding areas is that there are to many kids in a class and the teachers just can't get to know each child like they should be. Just from talking to many moms with kids in different schools and school districts, it seems a good number of kids in class for good student teacher communication is no more than 18 in a class.

toady_buckshot_noodle replied: Our district has a "gifted and talented" which they start in the 3rd grade. She has been in it from the beginning. Now, in the 7th grade she is in honors classes. She doesn't want to skip a grade because of having to leave her friends (understandable at 12). I don't think I could handle home schooling her at her level she would fly through the cirriculum too fast and then what? Private school is an option and she knows kids at all of them but she doesn't want to change schools. She says she will keep trying to be quiet. We are taking her to a counselor just so she has someone to talk to that will listen to how she feels unconditionally, she thinks we can't because of the teachers' complaining, she may be right.

Maddie&EthansMom replied: I think it is a smart decision to take her to a counselor. wink.gif She needs to be placed in an environment where she is more comfortable and can learn at her pace. ADD may be a reason, and no it isn't always bad, but in this case I think she is just bored. wink.gif

Let us know how it goes. She is very beautiful, btw. wink.gif I know you must be so proud of her. I have a friend who's friend is going thru this very thing. Any chance you live close to D.C.? happy.gif

toady_buckshot_noodle replied: Maddie&ethan'smom,
No we don't live near D.C. That picture was taken there, though. We live in SC. The pic was taken when she was there as a student ambassador.

A&A'smommy replied: She sounds bored to me too!!


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